Vampires Need Not…Apply? (Accidentally Yours #4)(64)
Author: Mimi Jean Pamfiloff

“What did he do?” Penelope asked Kinich.

“Time travel,” Kinich replied. “And vows he will do it again.”

“Okeydokey, then,” said Penelope. “Is he really incapable of lying?”

Kinich nodded yes.

“What next?” Penelope asked.

“You must free Chaam, and Cimil must be stopped.” Maggie turned to Antonio. “I will tell you how to free Ixtab, and in exchange, she will cure Chaam.”

Antonio wasn’t sure he liked Maggie’s plan. Not only did this Chaam sound dangerous, but opening the portal and freeing Ixtab only solved one problem. The other fact remained that his father had gone in with her.

“What about Guy, Niccolo, and the men?” Penelope asked.

“Once Chaam is free,” Maggie stated coolly, “the Maaskab will remove the hex; they will free your men. They want to fight you like Emma’s grandmother said.”

“Cimil convinced them this was their path to victory,” Máax added.

“Then it’s settled, we free Chaam,” Kinich stated.

“It must be put to a vote,” Fate stated dryly. “Despite how Chaam became evil, the fact remains that he did many terrible things and is, in fact, very dangerous. Releasing him is a risk and there is no guarantee Ixtab will be able to cure him.”

Penelope sighed. “I understand that, but if we can cure him, it could be the turning point for us; we’d have the Maaskab leader on our side. No war. No apocalypse. Done. Over.”

“You all assume,” Fate said, “that the apocalypse will be brought by the Maaskab. But that is not what Cimil predicted. She said the end was coming, not by whose hand.”

“Who else could it be?” asked Penelope.

Fate picked a piece of invisible lint from the front of her white dress. “That is for fate to decide.”

A loud groan erupted.

Penelope rolled her eyes. “All in favor of freeing Chaam and hunting Cimil?” Belch, K’ak, Fate, Akna, Bees, and A.C. raised their hands. “And Kinich and I vote yes, too.”

“I will volunteer to bring in Cimil,” A.C., God of Eclipses, said in a dark voice.

“That won’t be necessary.”

Everyone gasped and turned. Standing in the doorway was Cimil and a vampire. A very, very pale vampire who looked as though the thought of living one more second might bore him to death.

Maggie instantly lunged for the goddess, but an invisible hand reached out and held her back. “Her time will come, Margaret. Do not waste your efforts on her,” Máax stated calmly.

Cimil, who wore what appeared to be a pink-checkered square-dancing outfit, smiled. “Máax, sweetie. So glad to see you!” She burst out laughing. “Get it?” She turned to her vampire who made no reaction whatsoever.

“Yeah. I know. It’s totally true,” Cimil replied, though he hadn’t said anything.

“Cimil, what do you have to say for yourself? Did you turn Chaam evil? Have you been plotting the end of the world?” Kinich asked.

“Is that all you’ve got on me? ’Cause, I can tell you right now, my list is way longer.” She looked at her vampire. “Right, Roberto, baby?”

Roberto, who wore a black cape, red satin shirt, and leather pants, nodded at Cimil and then swooped out of the room with a twirl of his cape.

“Tootles!” Cimil chuckled and shook her head. “Vampires. They’re so dramatic with the whole entrance and exit thing. Did you notice? His cape is completely wrinkle-free. I’m getting really good at ironing. Aaahh… domestic bliss at last.”

“Cimil!” Kinich screamed. “Yes or no?”

Cimil jumped and then smoothed down her straight red hair. “Yes. It’s true. Every word. Before I say anything else, I demand a lawyer and fair trial. And a fruit basket. But instead of fruit, I want it filled with bagged blood. It’s for Minky, my unicorn. You do allow unicorns in prison, right?”

“A.C.? Can you deal with her?” Penelope asked.

Antonio blinked and suddenly Cimil was on the floor, sawing logs, her pink petticoat a tangled mess around her waist and her shiny, pink hot pants on display.

Kinich nodded at his brother A.C. “Thank you. Do you mind taking her to our special holding cell?”

A.C. bowed his head. “My pleasure. I’ve always wanted to use my gift of sleep to shut her up.”

“Well, that was certainly unexpected,” Penelope mumbled to no one in particular, then looked at Maggie. “I’m sorry, Maggie. Truly sorry for what you’ve been through.” She looked at Antonio. “The tablet is in the vault, so whenever you’re ready, let us know.”

“I’m nowhere near ready,” Antonio replied. “We cannot release Ixtab without risking that jodido demonio from escaping as well.” Gods, this was the most infuriating situation, because there was nothing he wanted more than to get Ixtab back. There had to be a way to do it without freeing that bastard father of his.

“Oh! Man! I looovvvee this channel. It just keeps getting better and better.” Belch poured yet another martini and burped.

“You’re vile,” Bees hissed.

“Christ almighty.” Kinich shook his head.

Penelope reached out and stroked his forearm. “What, honey? What’s the matter?”

He grumbled and then sucked in a breath. “The only deity capable of dealing with a demon is Cimil—the underworld creatures are her domain.”

A collective “Oh, crap” rang through the air.

“Checkmate!” Belch clapped and then roared with laughter, smacking his hand on the table. “Oh, gods, Cimil is a riot.”

Penelope ignored Belch, as did everyone else, and looked at Maggie. “You can go now. Ask the soldier outside to have someone show you to a room.”

“You’re not letting Cimil go, are you?” Maggie asked.

“No. We’ll find another way to deal with the demon,” Penelope replied.

“I want your word.” Maggie looked around the table. “I want everyone’s word or no deal. And for the record, I’m not telling you how to open the portal until Chaam is free.”

“For this to work, doesn’t Ixtab need to be there when we release him?” Penelope asked.

“Guess you’ll have to take the tablet to Mexico then and open the portal outside Chaam’s prison. Won’t you? Do we have a deal—yes or no?”

“Yes,” Penelope stated.