White Hot Kiss (The Dark Elements #1)(33)
Author: J. Lynn

Roth sighed. “Are you done?”

“No.” I laughed, reading over the partial incantation to summon. It involved getting nak*d and the blood of a virgin. No surprise there. There was no banishment spell. Though there was a seal that sort of looked like a messed-up compass. “How do I get rid of you?”

“All demons of the First Hierarchy have no known spells of banishment. You’d have to use a devil’s trap on a full moon, which is explained in the Lesser Key. But a devil’s trap doesn’t just banish a demon. It sends them to the fiery pits. That is like death to us.”

I looked at him, my amusement slowly fading. A muscle ticked along his jaw as he stared across the room, out the windows. “What?” I gave a short laugh. “This isn’t really you. It can’t be.”

He turned his head back to me, brows furrowed. “What do you think my full name is?”

“Whatever. You’re only eighteen and…” And I trailed off as I glanced back at the picture. The Roth sitting in front of me couldn’t be the Crown Prince of Hell. Then it struck me and I wanted to kung fu the book straight into his face. “You’ve been lying to me.”

“No. I was born eighteen years ago.” Roth shook his head. “You don’t understand.”

“You’re right. I don’t. This might be a fake, but the Lesser Key is older than dirt. How could you be in it?”

“I am just one of many,” he said, voice flat and cold. “Those who came before me met untimely ends or no longer served their purpose.” He smiled, but it lacked everything that made it human. “I am the most recent Crown Prince.”

I sat back. “So…you’re like a replacement?”

“An identical replacement.” He laughed humorlessly. “Each Roth before me looked just like me, talked like me and was probably almost as charming. So yeah, I’m a replacement.”

“Is it like that with the other demons?”

Roth dragged his fingers through his hair. “No. Demons can’t really die, but the fiery pits are our equivalent of death. All the former Princes are there, suffering in ways you couldn’t even imagine. I can hear their screams. Kind of serves as a good reminder to behave.” He shrugged casually, but I knew this whole thing bothered him. “So you see, I have lied a bit. I’m practically not even real.”

I closed the book, wanting to push it off the bed. Roth still sat beside me, stiff as stone. He was a replacement, created because the one before him had failed at something or had fallen prey to a devil’s trap. I couldn’t begin to imagine what that must feel like. Was he even his own person or an accumulation of the dozens, if not hundreds, that came before him?

I felt terrible for him. While I had barely scratched the surface of my heritage, Roth knew far too much about his own.

Silence stretched out. I could hear the kittens under the bed, purring like little freight trains. I dared a look at him and found him watching me intently. Our gazes locked.

He took a deep breath. “What?”

“I’m…I’m just sorry.”

Roth opened his mouth and then closed it. Several seconds passed before he spoke. “You shouldn’t feel sorry for me. I don’t.”

I didn’t believe him. Suddenly so many things made sense. “That’s bullshit.”

His eyes popped wide.

“It’s why you like it up here so much. You don’t want to be down there. You want to be up here, where everything is real.” I leaned forward, keeping his gaze. “Because you’re real and not just another Roth when you’re here.”

He blinked and then laughed. “Maybe that would be the case if I actually cared about that kind of stuff. I am what I am. I’m—”

“You’re a demon. I know.” I climbed onto my knees, facing him. “You always say that. Like you’re trying to convince yourself that’s the only thing you are, and I know that’s not the case. You are more than that, more than just another Roth.”

“Oh, here you go.” Roth flopped on his back, grinning up at the ceiling. “Next you’re going to tell me I have a conscience.”

I rolled my eyes. “I wouldn’t go that far, but—”

His chuckle cut me off. “You have no clue. Just because I like it topside doesn’t mean anything other than that I like places that don’t smell like rotten egg and aren’t a billion degrees.”

“You’re such a liar.”

He rose onto his elbows, his laughter fading into a smirk. “And you’re so incredibly naive. I can’t believe you feel sorry for me. I don’t even have a heart.”

I pushed his shoulders. He fell onto his back not because I’d exerted any real power, but mainly from surprise. It was all over his face. “You’re such an asshat. I’m ready to leave.”

Roth shot up and caught my arms, pressing me down in half a second. He hovered above me. “Why do you get mad when I tell you the truth?”

“It’s not the truth!” I tried to get up again, but he had me pinned. “I don’t understand why you have to lie. You’re not all bad.”

“I have reasons for doing what I do.” His gaze drifted off my face, down my body. “None of them are angelic. All of them self-serving.”

“No,” I whispered. I knew it wasn’t true. “You’re more than just the next Prince.”

He leaned down and we were chest to chest. His face was a mere inch or two from mine. Air hitched in my throat. “I am only the next Crown Prince. That’s what I am—all I am.”

“It’s not.”

Roth didn’t respond as he softened his grip and trailed his fingers down my arm. His hand skipped to my waist, then to my hip. Heat followed his touch, eliciting a sharp pang of yearning and even fear. He brought his gaze up, and the intensity in his stare had a magnetic pull. That heady tension was here, pulling us together. I was tired of ignoring it, tired of believing it was wrong when it was what I wanted—what I needed.

Because Roth was more than just a demon and I was more than just a girl caught between two races.

Slowly, I lifted my hand and placed it against his cheek. Only his chest moved, rising unsteadily. It was then that I realized he was just as affected as I was by whatever it was between us. It wasn’t just a game or a job. It was more than teasing and flirting. “You’re more than just another Roth. You’re more than that. You’re—”

Roth’s lips brushed mine. I sucked in a startled breath, freezing underneath him. It wasn’t much of a kiss, just a tentative caress, surprisingly soft and gentle. He didn’t push it or deepen the contact. He just hovered there, the butterfly kiss doing more to me than anything ever had.

And I wanted more, so much more.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Roth lifted his head and stared down at me. There wasn’t so much a question in his stare as a feral promise of things I probably couldn’t even begin to comprehend.

I placed my shaking hands on his chest. To push him away or pull him closer, I didn’t know. So many thoughts jumbled together. I wanted this, but I didn’t know what this was. The day by the park with Roth had been my very first kiss, and I wasn’t even sure if that counted as a real kiss. Oh, it had been good—really good—but had it been born out of passion? I didn’t think so. If anything, he’d kissed me to just prove that he could.

But now he’d really kiss me. I knew it in my bones.

I moved my trembling hands to his shoulders. I didn’t push hard, but Roth released me immediately, the muscles in his arms bulging as he breathed raggedly.

“What?” His voice was deep and endless.

Heart pounding, I pulled my hands back, folding them across my chest. My shirt was bunched up, our legs still tangled together. His eyes…they seemed to glow golden. “I think…I don’t know about this.”

Roth was very still for a moment, and then he nodded. I bit down on my lip as he rolled onto his side. I expected him to get up or be upset that I’d pulled the brakes before anything got started. Hell, a huge part of me was upset. Why had I stopped him?

“I’m sorry,” I whispered as I sat up and tugged down my shirt. “It’s just I’ve never—”

“It’s okay.” The bed dipped as Roth gathered me in his arms and pulled me back down to the bed. He stretched out, keeping me pressed close to his side. “It’s really okay.”

The black-and-white kitten jumped on the edge of the bed, rubbing against Roth’s foot and then mine, drawing our attention. The distraction was a good thing, because it felt like a swarm of butterflies had erupted in my stomach.

The kitten stilled, staring up at me with bright blue eyes. I waited for it to bite my foot or sink its claw into my skin, but it seemed to grow bored with me. It curled up in a tiny ball at the foot of the bed, quickly joined by the other two kittens.

Several moments passed in silence as I tried to get my heart under control and make sense of the warring degrees of disappointment and relief. Then Roth started to talk about random, mundane things. Like the television shows he missed while down under. “We don’t get cable down there,” he said. “Only satellite, and as soon as someone sends up a ball of flames, which is all the freaking time, it goes out.”

He told me how he and Cayman ended up being friends. Cayman apparently oversaw the portal and the apartment building. He’d hit on Roth, and Roth ended up with a loft above the bar after explaining he liked girls. Not sure how that one worked out, but I didn’t even question it.

And then he told me about his mom.

“You have a mother?” I asked, laughing, because it struck me as funny. I still pictured him hatching from an egg fully grown.

“Yes, I have a mother and a father. You do know how babies are made?”

I kind of wanted to show him that I knew exactly how babies were made. “What’s her name?”

“Oh, she has many names, and she’s been around a long, long time.”

I frowned. Why did that sound familiar?

“But I call her Lucy,” he added.

“Not Mom?”

“Hell to the no. If you ever met that woman—and believe me, you don’t ever want to meet her—you’d understand why. She’s very…old-school. And controlling.”

“Like Abbot?” I was too content to move and knock my hair out of my face. I tried blowing it off, but that didn’t work.

“Yeah, like Abbot.” He brushed my hair back, his fingers lingering on my cheek. “But I think Abbot actually cares about you.”

I frowned against his chest. “If he loved me, he wouldn’t have lied to me.”

“He lies to protect you.” A soft sigh shuddered through him. “That’s different.”

Part of me wanted to question why all of a sudden he was Team Abbot, but I let it slide. “What is she like?”

Roth tipped my head up, his thumb trailing over my lower lip. “She’s…something.”

We were quiet for a few minutes. “I have to head back soon.”

“Stony picking you up from school?”

“It’s not safe for Morris to pick me up anymore.” I don’t know why, but I felt like I needed to give a reason—a valid reason. “So, yeah, Zayne’s picking me up.”

His arm tightened around my waist. “Maybe I should introduce myself.”

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

He smirked. “I think it’s a brilliant idea.”

Disentangling myself, I sat up and straightened my shirt. A split second later, Roth’s hand was curved around my cheek. I hadn’t even seen him move. “You’re beautiful like this—your cheeks flushed and eyes wide.”

My heart did a dumb little dance. “Sweet-talking me into a meet and greet with Zayne isn’t going to work.”

He dropped his hand and pulled back. “Damn. I need a new plan.”

I pushed off the bed and backed up. “We really do need to head back.”

Roth gave a deep, heaving sigh and then stood, stretching his arms above his head. His pants hung low, revealing more of the dragon’s tail and the finger-width indentations beside his hips.

He caught me staring. “See something you like?”

I shot him a bland look, and then we, well, we stared at each other awkwardly. Everything had changed between us, even though I couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment when or be sure what it really meant. But later on, when I was pretending to come out of school and was heading toward Zayne’s Impala, I realized two things.

The weird spasming in my chest that happened whenever I thought of Roth was probably not going to go away anytime soon. And the whole reason for going to Roth’s loft had been lost to me the moment his lips had so carefully touched mine. If we continued this way, we were so screwed.

* * *