With My Last Breath

He threw his head back and laughed, a sound that warmed my soul. No matter what we had to go through or how many times he didn’t remember me, he was the same and so was I. That was all that mattered.

Courtney Cole 92

With My Last Breath, Book Three

Chapter Fifteen

We sat around a flickering campfire, the orange and red flames licking upwards toward the night and I stared at Lucan’s face through them. Without his knowledge, Hecate had bewitched our horses’ legs, enabling them to carry us farther than humanly possible away from the castle grounds. He didn’t even notice, engrossed in my feeble attempts to explain our predicament away.

In the darkness, Hecate nudged me.

"Here," she pushed something toward me. "Drink this. We’ll need you at full strength."

I glanced down at a gleaming nickel flask. She had brought nectar from the Spiritlands. Drinking it would maintain my immortal strength… and oh, how I wished I could share it with Lucan. But glancing at him, I knew that I could not. His face was pensive as he reflected across the campfire. He wasn’t ready to hear the truth.

"When should we tell him?" I whispered, confident that the crackles and pops of the fire would hide my question from him.

"Not yet," she replied thoughtfully. "Not yet."

I nodded as I lifted the flask to my lips, taking a sip of the sumptuous liquid.

Spiritlands nectar was the most delicious substance in the world, even if it was created from the blood of the unborn. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the overwhelming sensations as my strength returned to my limbs. I felt it flowing in my blood, warm and fierce.

"So where are we going?" Lucan asked. I opened my eyes to find him watching me, his dark eyes sharp and perceptive. I should have known. He never missed anything.

I rose from the blanket that I was seated on and crossed to his side, perching in the sand next to him. The wind gently blew, wafting his scent in my direction, and it was all I could do not to launch myself into his arms.

"We must travel to Brittany," I explained. "There is something there that we feel the King needs."

"And how would you know what the king needs?" Lucan asked me with a raised eyebrow.

"I just do," I murmured. "Can you trust me?"

He stared down at me, the bronzed angles of his face catching the firelight. His eyes were so deep that I felt I could fall into them.

"Possibly," he answered. "I feel as though I should, but I have nothing to base that feeling on."

Courtney Cole 93

With My Last Breath, Book Three

"Knights must often trust their instincts, correct?" He had told me as much many times.

"But alas, you have told me that I am no longer a knight," he answered dejectedly.

"And I cannot remember why."

"It is through no fault of your own," I assured him. "And we will work hard to put things to rights. Your assistance will be of utmost help."

He nodded. "And you will have it. I shall do what I can."

My heart ached at the pain on his face. My soul mate was loyalty and honor at its finest. It must be crushing him now to believe that the king had dismissed him from duty. I longed to reach out and stroke the pain away, to hold him close, but I swallowed hard instead, gripping my own hands in my lap. I must not.

"I think I will turn in," I said as I rose. "We will have a long ride in the morning."

Hecate and Lucan also rose and made preparations to sleep. We encircled our campground in a ring of fire in order to keep wolves away while we slept and laid our thick saddle blankets on the ground to sleep on.

"I’ll take first watch," Lucan offered. "I am not tired yet, anyway."

From the weary lines on his face, I knew he was lying. But it would do no good to argue. He would never let a woman take first watch.

"Very well," I answered. "Thank you. I’ll take it second."

I snuggled down into my saddle blanket and tried to sleep, ignoring the horse smell that emanated from it. Pulling my cloak around me, I discreetly watched Lucan. He stared into the night with alert eyes, studying any small noise with the utmost care. He held a sword on his lap. No matter where we were, he made me feel safe.

I meant to stay awake as well, but the warmth of the fire lulled me to sleep. My eyelids became so heavy that I simply couldn’t hold them open. But no sooner had I closed them, then I was standing in the Wastelands.

The harsh wind shrieked around me and the whiteness was startling… swirling with shades of black and gray. It was the strangest place I’d ever been. The cold penetrated me from the outside in and I stood shivering as I watched for Cadmus.

"Where are you?" I called into the vast empty space. "You’ve called me here…

where are you?"

There was no answer but for the howl of the wind. I pulled my cloak more tightly around my face.

"Cadmus!" I called. "Please answer me! I don’t like it here."

"No one does," a voice replied. I turned and found Ahmose standing behind me.

His black eyes glittered as he perused me.

"Cadmus is no longer here," he told me, staring at me as though I should have already known.

Courtney Cole 94

With My Last Breath, Book Three

"Where is he?" I asked, my heart leaping into my throat. "Where did he go? And if he’s not here, who brought me here? You?"

Ahmose nodded. "Yes, I brought you here, Harmonia. Everything has been changed. Have I taught you nothing over the years?"

"I don’t understand," I whimpered. "What do you mean?"

"You changed everything," Ahmose repeated sternly. "Everything that has happened is because of your carelessness. How could you let Lachesis know that you were in Camelot, that you knew everything? How could you be so careless?"

"Wait… did you know?" Something in his voice told me that he did.

"Of course I did. I’ve been with you for a very long time. I knew, but I was willing to be patient and wait until you trusted me enough to tell me. But you didn’t and now everything is in ruins."

"Don’t say that!" I shouted. "I’m going to fix it. Everything."

He shook his head sadly. "I don’t know that you can. Even a tiny ripple in time has massive consequences. I’ve told you that before. But this… this is no ripple. This is a jagged tear. Everything has been changed. There is no comprehending the consequences from this."