Be Mine at Christmas(10)
Author: Brenda Novak

Taking her hand, he began stroking her slim fingers. “So you went to live with Betty.”

She stared at the places where he touched her, as if mesmerized by his movements. “She was my aunt’s husband’s second cousin,” she said slowly. “When she heard Aunt Rosemary was going to have to put me up for adoption, she knew it wouldn’t be easy to find a good home for a ten-year-old, that I’d probably be bounced around in the foster system until I turned eighteen.”

“So she decided to take you in.”

“Yes.” She shivered as his fingers moved up the inside of her arm. Liking the reaction, he immediately imagined her in his bed, and wanted more. But she was still sending him inconsistent signals. Her body responded eagerly, yet she seemed reluctant.

“Do you like this?” he asked.

She nodded.

“What about this?” Lifting her hand, he caressed the sensitive tips of her fingers with his tongue. Then, one by one, he took each finger into his mouth, gently sucking on it.

She didn’t answer. But he heard her quiet gasp. She was breathing faster, too. He was willing to bet her heart was pounding right along with his.

Leaning closer, he brushed his mouth lightly across hers.

Good. Better than good. He was just going back for another pass, hoping to claim one deep, wet kiss. Her daughter was in the other room. He didn’t want to make Angela uncomfortable; he only wanted to show her what could happen if she gave in to what she was feeling.

But she pulled away before he could show her much of anything.

Matt frowned. “You’re not interested?” he murmured in confusion. Surely he couldn’t be that bad at reading her responses. He’d never misjudged a woman’s receptivity before.

“It’s getting late,” she said. “We—we’d better go.”

She tried to get up, but he held her fast. “Why are you running from me?”

“I’m not running from you.”

“What are you afraid of? Why won’t you give me the chance to really know you?”

“I’m not afraid of anything.”

“I want to spend some time with you, Angela. I want to be with you,” he said. “And I want to touch you.”

“I—” She seemed at a loss. “Matt, listen. This…isn’t right.”

He scowled. “Are you married?”

“I already told you I’m not.”

“Are you committed?”

She tucked her silky hair behind one ear. “No.”

“What is it, then?”

“I don’t even live here,” she said.

“That’s the reason?”

“Isn’t it enough?”

“No. Not if you’re feeling what I’m feeling. We have two weeks. Who knows where it could go beyond that? We wouldn’t be the first people to try and manage a long-distance relationship.”

“I’m not feeling anything,” she said quickly. “I— I have too much going on in my life. I can’t get involved right now.”

She was lying about what she felt. The excuse of a busy life sounded flimsy, too.

He opened his mouth to argue. But then he stopped himself. He’d be stupid to press her. She was in full retreat. Pushing harder would make her run that much faster.

They sat still for several seconds, staring up at the tree. “Okay,” he said at last.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“Will you do me one favor?”

Her gaze moved over him, as if she were committing every detail to memory. “If I can.”

“Tell me what happened that night. With Stephanie.”

“It’s over, in the past—”

“I want to know,” he said stubbornly.

She pulled her legs in close and propped her chin on her knees. “Stephanie was always so…impetuous,” she said reluctantly.

“Impetuous?” he echoed. “She was the most sexually aggressive girl I’ve ever met!”

“She had a terrible crush on you.”

“Calling it a crush makes it sound normal,” he muttered. “It was more like an obsession.”

“I know. I tried to get her to leave you alone. So did her mother. She wouldn’t listen. She never listened—to anyone.”

The bits and pieces he could recall began to filter through his mind. “I remember seeing her at the party when I arrived,” he said. “You were there, too. She asked me to dance, followed me around. The typical stuff. I was annoyed, but not too worried, you know?”

“Yes.”

“It was Danielle’s mother’s birthday,” he explained. “She’d gone out to dinner with her parents and was supposed to meet me later. I can still hear the music, see the people. Someone offered me a beer, but I knew I’d be driving her home that night and said no.”

“Is that all you remember?” she prompted when he stopped.

“No. I remember the way Stephanie was touching me, my eagerness to let her. What doesn’t make sense is why I did what I did. Things got out of control, and I didn’t seem to care. Then, in the middle of everything, I’m lying naked on the bed, and Danielle’s staring down at me, screaming and crying. Stephanie’s there, too, holding the sheets to her bare chest and smiling smugly, as if she’d wanted us to be caught.”

“I’m sure she did. That would’ve suited her purpose.”

How manipulative was that? He shook his head in disgust. “She told Danielle I’d just made love to her, when, regardless of what happened, there was no love involved, and she knew it.” He winced at the memory of Danielle vomiting afterward.

“Anyway, I couldn’t deny it,” he went on, embarrassed all over again. “I really had…you know. But, for the life of me, I can’t figure out why I didn’t stop. I would never have hurt Danielle that way. I’d had plenty of opportunities to be with Stephanie, if that was what I wanted.”

“Did you eat any brownies?”

“Is that where it was?” he asked.

Angela nodded.

“What was it, exactly?”

“Betty’s sleeping pills.”

“Sleeping pills?”

“They were strong. Because of her aches and pains, the doctor prescribed some sedatives. Stephanie simply stole a few from the medicine cabinet and mixed them in when she frosted a couple of the brownies she brought to the party.”

“The ones she made for me.”