Beneath This Man

Who the f**k does she think she is? I’m not naive enough to believe that she is trying to be a supportive friend. ‘Do you mind?’ I look directly at her so there’s no mistaking who I’m talking to.

She looks up at me questioningly, but makes no attempt to remove her hand from Jesse. I’m suddenly furious with myself for allowing another woman the opportunity to comfort him, especially this woman. That’s my job. Jesse pulls his arm away and her hand falls to the desk.

‘Excuse me?’ she splutters, which only serves to f**k me off more.

‘You heard me.’ I flash her a don’t-fuck-with-me glare and she smirks an almost undetectable smirk. She knows that I know her game. That should make our relationship a lot easier.

Jesse flicks his eyes nervously between the two women having a stand-off in his office. God bless him, he’s keeping his mouth firmly shut, but then the cheeky bitch only leans down and kisses him on the cheek, letting her lips linger there for longer than is really necessary.

‘Call me if you need me, sweetie.’ she says in the most ridiculous seductive voice I’ve ever heard.

Jesse stiffens from head to toe and looks at me, all wide eyed and with an alarmed look plastered all over his handsome face. He’s right to be anxious, especially after the barrel of shit he’s just thrown at me because of a male client and an ex-boyfriend. Matt and Mikael would be a mass of body parts if the boot was on the other foot.

I grab his office door and open it wide before fixing my eyes on the blonde, larger than life tramp. ‘Goodbye, Sarah.’ I say with optimum finality.

She looks at me with a cocky, self-assured, pouty face and slides off Jesse’s desk, sauntering across his office at a leisurely pace while giving me the eyeball. I hold her cocky face with my own take no prisoners’ stare, all the way to the door that I’m holding open for her. As soon as her six inch platform heels are over the threshold, I slam it behind her and silently hope it collided with her toned arse.

Now, let’s deal with my challenging man. I’m suddenly filled with determination to sort this shit out. Seeing him sat there with Sarah has made something perfectly clear to me.

He’s mine…end of.

I turn to face him. He hasn’t moved from his chair, the bottle of vodka is still sat in the middle of his desk like the proverbial pink elephant that it is and he’s chewing his bloody lip, cogs steaming.

I nod at it. ‘Why is that there?’ I ask assertively.

‘I don’t know.’ he replies. His face is tortured and it kills me to be on the other side of the room from him.

‘Do you want to drink it?’

‘Not now you’re here.’ His quiet words register loud and clear.

‘You walked out on me.’ I remind him.

‘I know.’

‘What if I hadn’t of come?’ That’s the operative question here. I’m re-visiting the same thing over and over in my mind. He behaves like this is a piece of pie, constantly reassuring me that he doesn’t need a drink as long as he has me, but now I find him keeping company with a bottle of vodka because we’ve had words. Okay, it was more than words, but that’s not the point. I can’t worry like this every time we quarrel. It doesn’t escape my notice that the vodka wasn’t the only thing he was keeping company with.

‘I wouldn’t have drunk it.’ He pushes it away.

I glance at the bottle and notice it’s sealed and full, but it’s still there and something made him put it there…me. I’m the reason for his screwed up mind, his ridiculously ambitious objectives and his meltdowns. This is my entire fault. I’ve made him into a neurotic control freak.

We remain looking at each other for a few moments, my mind racing with all of the things we need to sort out, while he bites his bottom lip, clearly not knowing what to say to me. I’m not sure where to start either.

‘Why is it there?’ I ask.

He shrugs casually. It makes me mad. My fear was warranted, and now he expects me to let him brush it off and play it down with his vague answers and shoulder shrugs?

‘I wasn’t going to drink it, Ava.’ His voice is slightly irritated.

I’m staggered. ‘Would you drink it if I leave?’

His eyes fly to mine, panic invading his handsome face. ‘Are you going to leave me?’

‘You need to give me some answers.’ I’m threatening him, but I feel like it’s my only option. There are some things he needs to tell me. ‘Why is Mikael so interested in our relationship?’

‘His wife left him.’ he spits the words out quickly.

‘Because you slept with her.’

‘Yes.’

‘When?’

‘Months ago, Ava.’ He looks at me, sincerity in his eyes. ‘She was the woman who turned up at Lusso. I’ll tell you before you threaten to leave me again.’ His sarcasm is quite endearing.

‘She wasn’t worried about you, was she?’

‘Yes, probably, but she wants me too.’

‘Who wouldn’t?’ I feel incredibly calm.

He nods mildly. ‘I’ve made it clear, Ava. She’s gone back to Denmark, and I slept with her months ago. I don’t know why she’s decided to pursue me now.’

I believe him, and anyway, Mikael has been sorting his divorce out so it has to be some time ago. Divorcing someone takes time. It’s all becoming very clear. Mikael is the no one specific who will try to take me away from Jesse.

‘He wants to take me away from you, like you did his wife.’