Better when He's Bold

He grunted and moved to the tiny kitchenette to grab his keys.

“No. A fairly decent guy who likes to gamble on baseball, only his team had a shit year and now he’s in trouble. He’s been trying to get on top of it, and so far, all he’s done is dig the hole deeper, but if I let him square up by working out something with your mom, I think he would jump at the chance. I’m not promising anything, but it’s worth a shot.” He came back over and gave me a kiss that had me squirming against him, and not just because I was freaking out about murdering him with my morning breath. “I’ll give you a call in a bit to let you know what I find out.”

I just watched him saunter away and was left to ponder how I had gone from being so frozen and stuck in a life that felt like a shadow of what it should be, to being right in the center of a life full of danger and risk with a guy like Race at the heart of it. It felt so good that he wanted to step in and try and tidy up everything that had spilled over in the last year or so, but it also made me wary.

Race was obviously a problem solver, he always had a ready answer, but when I’d asked him about my dad’s future, he had been vague. I liked Race, probably was right on the cusp of being in love with him, but I didn’t know what that looked like if I had to process what happened if he ended up hurting my dad. It was that contradiction that I always seemed to wrestle with when it came to him. He would do something wonderful like try and get my mom the help she so desperately needed, then turn around and have to take out street vengeance on my dad. I couldn’t get my head fully wrapped around having feelings for the man capable of doing both of those things in the same breath.

Deciding I wasn’t going to have a concrete answer to that dilemma right at the moment—or maybe ever—I hauled myself out of bed and went to take a shower and get presentable for the day. I climbed back into my outfit from yesterday and decided I was skipping school for the rest of the day and that I would just go to work later on. I searched high and low in Race’s minimal space for something to eat, only to come up empty. I didn’t know how he could live like this. There was something to be said for living simple and not acquiring unnecessary things, but he kept that amazing car and I saw the way he dressed. He was taking minimalistic living to the extreme, and by now I had a firm enough grasp on how he worked to know there was a reason behind it.

My growling stomach wouldn’t allow me to hang around the loft without some kind of sustenance, so I made my way down the stairs and into the garage. Bax immediately popped his head out of his office when he caught sight of me. It looked like Race wasn’t the only person keeping an eye on me around these parts. He tilted his chin at me and looked like he was going to retreat back inside when I called his name. He turned around and propped a heavily muscled shoulder on the doorframe.

I walked up to him, and putting all the old fear and questions I had about him aside, wrapped my arms around his lean waist and gave him a hug. I felt him go stiff and pull back.

“What in the hell was that for?”

Both of his black eyebrows were raised to his hairline and the star tattooed by his eye was twitching. Bax was not a guy you just randomly squeezed out of gratitude, apparently.

“I just wanted to tell you thanks for getting that creep in my class to back off. I really appreciate it. Also, if you know anyone who would be interested in buying my car, could you maybe feel them out for me? I still owe money on it but I need to make enough on the sale to get a small apartment somewhere for me and my sister.”

“Say thank you with words, not hugs. All I did was lurk around. Race was pissed and the guy knew it. Someone messing around deep in your life like that”—he gave me a pointed look—“means someone wants to not only hurt you but make your life crumble from the inside out.”

I bit down on my lower lip. “Race says it’s someone with a hard-on for me.”

He nodded, dark eyes serious and steady. “Sounds like it.”

Well, there wasn’t anything I could do about it now, not until I had some idea who it was at least.

“Will you let me know about the car?”

“I’ll keep an eye out. BMWs always sell, but you know Race will lose his mind if you get rid of that car and take up residence in some slum down here.”

“Race can’t fix every problem I have right now. The ones he’s already helping me with are enough.”

Bax grunted at me and turned back around to go into his office but not before telling me very matter-of-factly, “You bring him a problem, he’s going to try and fix it. It’s what he does for the people he cares about, and if you don’t let him help you with it, he’ll take matters into his own hands anyway. Don’t make him go around you so that you have an excuse to be mad at him later. That isn’t fair and you’re both too smart for it.”

“Why do you even care, Bax?”

He glared at me over his shoulder and I saw him dig in his pocket for his smokes. “Race and I have a shit ton of history. Most of it good, a pretty big chunk of it bad. I’m in love with his sister and she makes me appreciate having someone that you’re willing to destroy an entire city for. Race will tear apart anything and anyone he thinks is a threat to you, so you need to handle him carefully. Being with guys like us . . .” He shrugged and put the end of his cigarette in his mouth. “It’s like being in love with a loaded weapon and you’re the safety.”

I wanted to tell him I wasn’t in love with Race and that I didn’t have anything left in me to be the safety for him, but Bax’s dark eyes saw the truth so I didn’t bother to lie. I just turned around and walked away wondering how I could be Race’s safety if I didn’t even know how to handle a gun.