Blinding Trust (Mitchell Family #7)(49)
Author: Jennifer Foor

When we got home, he came around to my side of the vehicle and helped me out of the car. He kept his arm around me until I was laying down on the couch, but still said nothing. Maybe he knew I couldn’t deal with talking about it, or maybe he was just as broken up as I was about it.

After he got me some tea, he went into his office and closed the door. I could hear the murmurs of him talking on the phone. I knew he was calling the family. He was trying to be respectful, but just knowing he was in there telling everyone I loved my bad news, was difficult. I almost felt like I just wanted to get through it all by myself, instead of them worrying about me.

I could hear my cell phone vibrating in my purse. It had been doing it for a while and I couldn’t handle talking to anyone.

When Colt came out of the office, he heard it and pulled it out. I could see the look on his face and knew who had called. He pushed the blanket to the side and sat down on the edge of the couch. “How are you doin’?”

I shrugged. “Not good. When do the kids get home?”

“Your parents are keepin’ them. I think your dad said they are going to take them to bible school tonight, so they won’t think anything of it.”

“How did they take the news?” Right away, my eyes began to burn.

He took his hat off and tossed it on the table, then wiped his face with one of his hands. “They’re upset. They kept askin’ me a bunch of questions.”

“I can only imagine what they must be feeling. I’m their only child. They moved here to be close to me. What will happen if this takes my life?”

He turned and looked me right in the eyes. I could see the pain that he was carrying. His eyes were red and I knew he’d gotten emotional in his office. “It ain’t goin’ to. Savanna, please stop talkin’ like that. You’ve got so much to live for, darlin’. I don’t think I could live a single day without you. We all need you. I don’t care how hard it gets. You’re goin’ to fight this. You hear me?”

I nodded but continued to cry. I hated this so much. It was so difficult.

“When you went into the bathroom, the doctor told me that he thinks you have a good chance at beatin’ this. Darlin’, I know you can. I’ve seen you fight for what you want.”

With every feeling playing heavy on my mind, there was one thing that I knew for certain. “I won’t give up! I promise.”

He leaned over and kissed me. “That’s my girl.” He smiled, just enough to show me he was proud. Then he reached over and handed me my phone. “You better call Ty. He’s sent you several messages and I know he’s worried.”

I didn’t feel like talking, but I certainly didn’t want him jumping on a plane again, so I called Ty.

It’s about time.

I didn’t feel like talking.

Well, you can’t just leave me hanging. I knew Colt wasn’t going to call. I had to hear it from Conner. Do you know how sucky that was for me?

Can you not make this about you? I have bigger problems than wondering who knows my business.

So, now what happens?

They are going to go in and remove it.

Then you’re out of the woods?

No. I have to do one round of radiation.

Will you lose your hair? I bet you’d be hot bald.

I couldn’t believe he was joking around, but it did make me laugh.

Stop joking around.

If I were you, I’d wear a clown wig. That would be f**king funny.

I’m going to hang up on you, if you don’t stop.

I’m sorry. I went online and did some research. Did you know that if you get a double mastectomy, it decreases your chances of it coming back by a lot.

I can’t believe I am talking to you about this, but my doctor told me that as well.

So, are you going to do it?

I don’t know! I’m scared.

Colt will still love you, Van. If that’s what’s keeping you from doing it, you need to rethink that decision. He wants you healthy. It’s all that matters to him.

I know.

Did you know they can tattoo ni**les back on the skin? I’ve been looking at nipple tattoos for the past hour. I tried to show Miranda how cool it was. She smacked the shit out of me and called me an insensitive ass**le.

I burst into laughter. I just couldn’t help it. The day had been so horrible and only Ty could make a joke out of something so serious. I didn’t know if I was just being ridiculous, or I really found him funny. He wasn’t trying to be a jerk. He wanted me to have a reason to smile. Ty wanted me to be able to see something funny out of what I feared. He wanted to know that every single time I thought about that surgery, I thought about the funny things he’d said. I loved him for that.

You are disgusting and definitely an ass**le!

I can’t help myself. You know I can’t do serious. Whoever created sadness is an ass**le!

Yeah, you got that right.

Where’s your hubby? Is he still planning my demise?

No! he’s right here.

He still doesn’t want to talk to me?

Not yet.

What a douche. Is he treating you good? Do I need to come out there and knock him around?

I started laughing again. Ty had never been able to take on Colt and he knew it. He’s being wonderful.

Miranda said to tell you she loves you. She also said that if you don’t call her, she’s going to send the boys to live with you and Colt.

I laughed again. Okay, I promise I will call her. Just give me some time. I need to get my feelings in order first.

I get it. Listen, if you need to smile, you know where to find me. I’m only a phone call away. I’d do anything to take this pain away from you, Van. You’re the best person that I’ve ever known. We all love you so much.

I started to sob. I love you all, too.

Colt took the phone and put it back in my purse. He sat back down and gave me all of his attention. “We don’t have to talk about anything until you’re ready.

“I know.”

“Savanna, do you even know how my people love you? Do you get how many hearts you reached out and touched? You don’t have to go through this alone, darlin’. You will never be alone. I promise.”

I don’t know if it was that exact moment, but I became determined to do whatever I needed to do to get through this. I had children to raise and a family to grow old with. I wasn’t going to let some little mass in my breast end my life. Not when I had a million reasons to live.

Chapter 26

Colt

I think hearing someone has cancer is hard for anyone to handle, but hearing it about your own wife is indescribably hard. This was the woman that I promised to love for the rest of my life. If she was taken from me prematurely, I didn’t know how I would survive. I’d always considered myself a good father, but I couldn’t be the parent that she was. She was the rock of our family and without her we would crumble.