Chaos series by Kristen Ashley
“So you were that hard on her because you wanted to make me the good guy?” I asked in disbelief.
He bent slightly to me to get his face closer to mine. “I was that hard on her because she deserved it.” When I opened my mouth, he stated, “Bottom line. Burns in me my baby girl’s even got it in her to do somethin’ that fucked up. So, Millie, she deserved it.”
I had to admit, I saw his point there.
“Deb’s gonna hear about this,” he continued. “And she’s not gonna be happy. She doesn’t put up with crap like that. She offered to wade in. I’m gonna call her and tell her she’s up.”
That was a surprise.
“She offered to wade in?”
He dropped his hand from my face and straightened to look down at me from his full height.
“Talked to her after last weekend so she’d know I got this battle on my hands with Zadie and I intend to win it. She said she’s on board however I need her to help. She also said she wants to meet you and I’m thinkin’ that’s a good idea.”
That was also a surprise and a scary one.
Not the part that he’d talked to his ex.
One thing I knew for certain about men like Logan was, you trusted them. You didn’t invade their phones. You didn’t search their cars. You didn’t listen in on calls. You didn’t ask them to account for every second of their days. You trusted them to do right, if not all the time, at least by you.
He and Deb shared kids, so he was going to talk to her and I wasn’t going to be the woman in his life that demanded he detail every conversation they had.
No.
The scary surprise wasn’t that.
It was that she wanted to meet me.
I barely controlled my voice pitching high when I asked, “What?”
“You meet her. You two connect. Not sayin’ you guys are gonna be best buds. What I’m sayin’ is, you meet her, you connect, we do somethin’, the three of us with the girls. Maybe not dinner but maybe she drops ’em off here, comes in, you make her welcome. She has a drink and a chat, takes off before we take the girls out to do somethin’. They see you and Deb gettin’ on and Deb supportin’ what we got, they’ll move toward doin’ the same thing.”
This was actually somewhat ingenious.
“That’s not a bad idea, Low.”
His brows shot up in manly affront. “I know it’s not.”
“Are you… is she… ?” I shook my head and started again. “Are you sure she’s cool with meeting me?”
“She wants me happy.”
I stared at him again.
Then I muttered, “I seriously don’t get what you had with her.”
“Two kids. That’s it,” he replied, even though I didn’t expect a response. “It’s totally fucked. Lived the whole time with her knowin’ that. It’s just the way it is with her. She’s not a woman you love. She’s not even a woman you try to make happy ’cause you’ll fail. She’s just a woman. And she’s good with that. She says she’s happy. Cleo says she’s happier without me there. She’s got what she wants, two daughters she can give what she’s got to give without tryin’ to pretend she has somethin’ with her man. But she’s also a decent woman and she says she wants me happy. I believe that because she’s a decent woman. Now we both got what we want so it ain’t fucked anymore. It just is.”
“I have to admit, you having a non-psycho, pining, or pissed-off ex is definitely a plus to our ongoing situation,” I blurted.
Logan grinned.
“Yeah. Deb gave me two beautiful girls and not much else. But she’s givin’ us that. Outside my girls, best thing she can give.”
As insane as that was, it was also true.
I stood, and since he didn’t move an inch when I did, this put us deep in each other’s space.
When I got there, I pushed my hands in his cut so I could curl them in the sides of his shirt.
Only then did I carefully advise, “You need to have more patience with Zadie.”
Logan lifted his hands and rested them lightly where my neck met my shoulders. “She’s had ten years of patience from her old man, baby. This is a monster I created. It’s tough work, I didn’t like doin’ that to her, but I gotta do the work to beat back the monster and bring out my little girl. I know she hasn’t givin’ you any of it, babe, but when she’s not bein’ like that, which she’s never been as bad as that, but she still can be a princess, she’s sweet as can be. God’s honest truth. She’s funny and full a’ love. And I want her to give you that.”
“I understand that,” I replied. “But you need to have more patience, Logan.”
He looked into my eyes before he agreed by nodding.
I let go of his shirt, pushed closer, and wrapped my arms around him, tipping my head way back as I erased any space between us while watching him tip his head way down to keep my eyes.
“You only had half of what you wanted for a long time. I understand tasting the promise of getting it all and wanting that to happen now,” I said quietly.
“Yeah,” he murmured, stroking my throat with one of his thumbs.
“What you have to get, Snooks, is that we’re all here, all you wanted you now have, and things might not be great right now, but we’re not going anywhere.”
He dipped his head even closer so all I could see was his eyes and I could feel the whisper of his nose.
“Yeah,” he repeated, sweeping his thumb along my jaw.