Cold feet(27)
Author: Brenda Novak

Just as she wanted to be left in peace. But she hadn’t really answered his question. If Ellis hadn’t been lying, why didn’t he try to prove it?

Maybe winning her over would take too long. Maybe he needed to crack her cautious facade. "Do you ever think about the victims?" he asked.

She jerked as though he’d just poked her with something sharp, and he immediately realized he’d said what he’d said to remind himself of who she was. She appealed to him at such a gut level he regretted that he couldn’t get to know her in any type of honest relationship.

"I try not to," she said.

"Did your father ever say anything about them?"

Ignoring his last question, she headed for the kitchen. "Thanks for the pizza, but I’d rather not talk about this anymore. It’s hard enough to forget what happened to those poor women without dragging it all out in the open."

"I’m sorry," he said, following her.

She didn’t answer.

"Madison?"

"It’s late."

His calculated risk hadn’t paid off. She hadn’t given him any new information and was most definitely shutting him out. "Are we on for breakfast in the morning?"

"I don’t think so. I promised Brianna I’d take her to the zoo, and we should probably get an early start. Maybe we’ll just prorate your payment for meals by the number of days I actually cook."

"No problem," he said, because he didn’t have a choice.

She led him down the hall and flicked on the porch light as soon as they reached the front door. "Watch that first step," she said politely as she held the door open for him.

Caleb started to go, then turned back to face her. "I don’t want to go home like this," he said. It was probably the most honest thing he’d said so far.

"I don’t know what you mean."

"What’s wrong?"

"Nothing."

"You’re upset."

"I’m not upset," she said.

"Then what?"

"I’m–" she lifted her hands helplessly "–disappointed."

Caleb leaned against the doorframe, wishing he could go back in time and take the evening a little more subtly. He’d grown impatient and pushed too hard. And he’d become frustrated by the fact that he really liked her when he didn’t want to like her at all. "Are you going to tell me why?"

She sighed and folded her arms. "I guess I stupidly thought that when you offered to be my friend, you meant it."

His conscience wouldn’t let him say he did want to be her friend, even though, on some level, it was true. If there’d never been a Sandpoint Strangler…If Susan weren’t missing…"And now?"

"And now I know you’re just like everyone else. You’re only out to satisfy your morbid curiosity at my expense." She lifted her chin. "Well, I hope you were entertained."

Caleb didn’t know how to respond. He let the silence stretch, torn between his duty and how he would have handled the situation if circumstances were different. "I owe you an apology," he said at last, but that sounded trite, even to his own ears. So he stepped close and ran a finger lightly over her soft cheek. "I’m really sorry, Madison."

She swatted his hand away and blinked several times in rapid succession, as though battling tears, and Caleb couldn’t help pulling her into his arms.

She resisted at first, but he murmured, "It’s okay, come here," and she finally relaxed against him. Only he didn’t feel he’d improved matters. He couldn’t promise to be a better friend. He couldn’t declare his innocence. He was still living a lie.

He held her for several minutes–until he felt her tears fall on his forearm. Then he leaned away to wipe her cheeks and said what had been going through his mind all evening. "You’re so beautiful, Madison. You know that?"

She stared up at him, her dark eyes luminous in the porch light. His gaze lowered to her lips. Then his heart began to pound and he did something he knew he was going to regret–he bent his head and kissed her.

CALEB’S KISS WAS SOFT and lingering, gentle. Letting her eyes close, Madison slipped her fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck and refused to think about anything. Not all the arguments against what she was doing. And certainly not her father. It was late, and they were completely alone. She felt as though she’d stolen this moment out of time and could do with it as she pleased. If she wanted only to feel–to feel and forget the shadow of violence in her life–she could do it right now.

Breathing in, she caught his slightly musky scent and liked it. When his arms tightened around her, she liked that, too. For the first time in a very long while, she seemed to be drowning in a sea of warm, pleasant sensations. She’d been cold for so long; she hadn’t even realized how cold, until now.

His hand came up to brace her head as he parted her lips. She hesitated briefly as she remembered his pointed questions. But most people were curious about her father, and her disappointment in Caleb’s earlier insensitivity was swept away by his touch. All of a sudden, she wasn’t a rejected wife. She wasn’t a single mother trying to run a struggling small business. She was young and wanton and desirable again….

You’re so beautiful, Madison.

Sliding her other hand up over the muscles of his chest, she leaned into him as he kissed her more deeply. She wanted him to go on and on but, without warning, he pulled away.

"I shouldn’t have done that," he said, closing his eyes as though he’d just made a huge mistake. "I had no idea."

She cupped his chin and made him open his eyes. "No idea of what?"

His breathing was a little erratic, giving her the impression that whatever had come over her had affected him just as much. "That you, of all people, could do this to me."

"Me, of all people? What’s that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," he said and left.

THE FOLLOWING MORNING, Caleb started packing. His big strategy had been a bust. He’d spent nearly the entire night thinking about Madison, and had decided he just wasn’t cut out to use her. He was the guy who’d married a woman twice just to be sure he’d given her a fair shake. What made him believe he’d be able to divorce himself from the personal betrayal involved in what he had planned for Madison? She might be Ellis Purcell’s daughter, but she was as deserving of loyalty and respect as anyone else.

He’d just have to find Susan without her. He wasn’t sure there was any connection between the Sandpoint Strangler case and his ex-sister-in-law’s disappearance, anyway. He’d only been working on a hunch. He’d buy out the lease and be on his way and never think of Madison Lieberman again.

Except that he knew he would think of her. After that kiss, he craved the taste of her–and wished like hell that they’d met under different circumstances.