Confessions of an Alli Cat

Opportunities like Alex.

But I shut that annoying inner voice up by sitting up and smiling confidently at the two men next to me.

“Who is up for a shower?” I ask brightly.

Shade cocks an eyebrow.  “You’re asking both of us?”

I nod what I hope is a confident and sex-vixen-ish nod.

“I’m just asking for a shower,” I say innocently.

Shade grins in reply, as does Tyler.

“I’ve rubbed off on you, Alli Cat.  You’re quite the pupil.”

I slide from the bed and grab his hands, pulling him with me to the bathroom. Tyler trails behind on his own accord, closing the bathroom door as he enters.

“Well, a pupil is only as good as her teacher,” I purr, running my hands up and down Shade’s flat, strong chest.

But as Tyler turns on the water in the shower and I step in with Shade, the only thing I can see is Alex’s face for a second. It’s startling and I gasp.

“Are you alright?” Tyler asks me in concern.  I nod.

“Yes, I’m fine.  The water just wasn’t warm yet.”

But that’s a lie.  The water was perfectly warm.  And so are my cheeks as I realize that I’m thinking of Alex while I’m showering with two young, gorgeous men.  If I had wanted to have a real threesome, which I most certainly do not, those desires would have been dashed at these unexpected thoughts of Alex.

So, instead, I block out images of him and just enjoy being washed by two attentive men.  Tyler washes my front, Shade washes my back. And they are both pressed against me, wet and slippery and hard.

Holy Freaking Hotness.

But we only take a shower.  I meant what I said.  I don’t quite feel comfortable enough with the situation to use Tyler’s “services”.   Even still, it’s a very sexy situation.  These guys are gorgeous and sexy and very good at their jobs.  This is a memory that will forever live in infamy in my mind.

But as Shade pats me dry with a big, fluffy towel, I find myself imagining that his hands are Alex’s hands.  And I sigh a very long sigh.

I’m seriously, definitely, most certainly in trouble.

Chapter Nineteen

(Or:  Fate is a Twisted, Sick Wench)

“Omigod.  You’re so going to hell,” Sara exclaims into my phone as pull on a robe the next morning and stumble to the kitchen to make coffee. “I wouldn’t even do that.  Well, maybe I would.  But I haven’t yet.”

I roll my eyes.  “You so would.  Your little guy, Chaz, just hasn’t thought of trying it yet with you.  You should mention it to him. I know you’d like it.”

“Honey, I would rock the hell out of that shit,” Sara says and I know that she has already mentally added it to her list of things to do.”

I pour the coffee into the maker as I listen to her ramble.

“So, you didn’t actually have sex with the second one?” she asks, a little incredulous.  I giggle.

“No.  I sort of actually wanted to… but that would be crossing a line for me, I think.  I can only go so far until I feel like I’m getting out of control.  But it was still fun.  I felt really naughty.”

“You were really naughty,” she answers.  “Ooh- have you ever thought of getting spanked??  A naughty girl should be spanked.  And you’re welcome. If it weren’t for me, you’d still be twiddling your thumbs all by yourself on the weekends.”

“Thank you, Sara,” I answer obligingly.  “You’re right.  You have expanded my horizons but not far enough to get spanked.  I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t enjoy that.”

I hit the brew button and then collapse into a kitchen chair.

It’s 10:00 am and I’m only just now getting up.  But to be fair, I didn’t get home until after 2:00 am.  Sophie stayed the night with Hayley again and she’s not home yet, so there’s no reason I needed to be up earlier.

Sara chatters into my ear for a while and I don’t know why, but I decide to tell her about Alex and how I couldn’t even keep him out of my thoughts last night when I was with Shade and Tyler.  She is silent in astonishment for a moment after I am through.

“Omigod,” she says again for the fortieth time today. “You’re falling for your boss. Like, really falling for him.”

“Maybe,” I tell her.  “He just seems so right for me.  And he’s so hilarious.  You know how I love a good sense of humor.  Plus, we’re in the same exact position in life.  It’s uncanny.  But I just don’t think I can bring myself to date anyone right now. That’s how you talked me into the whole Shade thing, remember? Because I wasn’t ready to date.”

“Yes, but Shade was meant as a way to ease you into the dating world. I figured if you had sex with someone, it would take the stress out of getting into a real relationship eventually.  It’s been nine months since the divorce, Alli.  And you were in therapy for a year before that, trying to figure everything out.  You’ve worked on yourself, you’ve given yourself time.  If there is someone there who seems to be everything you want, you shouldn’t hesitate to reach out and grab him by the balls.”

“You make him sound like he is ripe apricot at the grocery,” I tell her grumpily.  “Except for the balls part.  You don’t get it.  He’s my boss.  I’m afraid to date anyone right now.  I put fifteen years into my relationship with Rick only to have him cheat on me and trash everything we worked for.”

Sara snorts.  “Rick didn’t work for anything.  You did all the work.  You worked on the relationship, you worked to earn enough money for him to start his own business…. You worked.  He didn’t.  It’s time for you to date a real man.”

I’m silent as I think about that.

But my moment of reflection is interrupted by the doorbell.

“Hey, I’ve got to go,” I tell Sara.  “I’ll call you later.”

I pad to the door and peer through, only to find Rick the Dick himself standing on my porch.  Holy crap.  Speak of the devil.

I open the door.

“Yes?  Sophie isn’t here.  Were you supposed to pick her up?”

I’m confused.  No one told me anything of the sort.  But he is already shaking his head.