Deep Redemption

. . . and I couldn’t look away. I couldn’t move my hands, nor stop the flood of tears as my brother and best friend stared up at me from a now-soulless body.

Even though the night was humid and hot, cold ran over my skin. My hands had frozen on his neck . . . I couldn’t move . . .

My arms began to shake. The trembling shivers reached my locked fingers, and they fell from Judah’s neck. The red prints of my hands were splayed like burn marks on his skin. I closed my eyes. But all I saw was Judah’s dimming face mouthing, “Cain . . . Cain . . . ”

He had pleaded me to spare him . . . but I couldn’t . . . I fucking couldn’t . . .

I opened my eyes and forced myself to move off his corpse. But when I turned and was met with hundreds and hundreds of dead, poisoned followers, my head shook. My hands raked through my hair and I looked in every direction, searching for some kind of peace. None was found.

Tears blurred my sight, but I could see the Hangmen all watching me . . . I choked out a cry at so much death, the sight of endless, senseless murders too much to take . . . to comprehend . . .

My legs gave out and I fell to the floor . . . right beside Judah. My face contorted with the pain ripping me apart from inside. But the darkness in my heart remained; it fucking ran like rapids through every vein, blotting out any light and good with its shade. I tipped back my head and roared. I screamed and screamed until the sound of my pain was the only noise to be heard.

When I had nothing left to give, I fell forward onto my hands, gasping for breath. I sucked in long, desperate inhales, but nothing took this ache away, this fucking racking ache in my heart.

Suddenly, a hand landed at my back. I flinched and sat up, ready to fucking fight whoever came at me next. But when I looked up, Smiler was standing before me. He stared down with an unreadable expression on his face . . . then held out his hand. I looked at it, not knowing what the fuck to do. Smiler, swallowed. “Take it.”

So I did. I held out my shaking hand and took my former best friend’s help. Smiler pulled me off the ground. I didn’t look back at Judah. I couldn’t look back.

My gaze tracked around the gathered Hangmen. They had all survived. And they all stared at me in disbelief. “Rider . . . what the fuck?” Smiler said hoarsely, pointing at the masses of dead.

“He got out of the cell. He killed them. He made them take their own lives. I . . . ” I trailed off. “I couldn’t fucking stop it. I couldn’t save them . . . the children . . . none of them . . . ”

My gaze landed on Ky, and Phebe’s face suddenly came to my mind. “Phebe,” I said under my breath, and ran around the perimeter of bodies until I hit the line of trees. I ran, hearing the sound of the Hangmen giving chase. I slapped branches from my path as I tore through the woods toward the cellblock.

I burst through the bushes at the back of the block, and I breathed my first bit of air. Stephen and Ruth were standing near the small outdoor cell. They quickly hid something behind them with their bodies.

When Ruth’s swollen, bruised eyes landed on me, her hand flew to her mouth and she cried out. She turned her face into Brother Stephen’s chest and sobbed.

I stood, frozen, not knowing what the fuck to do. I heard the brothers push through from the woods behind me. Stephen and Ruth’s expressions became racked with fear.

The sound of safeties being clicked off made me whip around. Ky, Flame and Styx had their semi-automatics raised at my friends. I held up my hand “No,” I managed to say with the leftovers of my raw, croaky voice. “These are the defectors who helped me get Bella free. They are innocent.”

Styx’s eyes narrowed on Stephen. Turning to Stephen, I said, “This man is with Mae.” I pointed to Flame. “Flame is married to Maddie.”

Brother Stephen’s assessing gaze roved over the prez and Flame. “Thank you,” Stephen said to the two brothers . . . and me. “Thank you for saving them when I could not. I can never repay you for what you have done for my girls.”

Rustling came from the trees. The Hangmen all snapped into action and raised their guns, ready. Solomon and Samson ran through, staggering in shock when eleven sets of guns were aimed at their heads. The two built brothers stopped dead and held up their hands.

“This is Solomon and Samson,” I said quickly. “They helped us too.”

“These ‘roided-up fuckers helped?” Bull asked.

I nodded. Styx lowered his hand, motioning for the brothers to lower their guns.

“We need to get the fuck gone,” Ky said.

AK stepped forward. “Where’s the redhead? She was involved in this too, weren’t she?”

My head whipped around the cellblock. “He took her,” Solomon said. “That Meister fucker took her. We gave chase but he had a vehicle waiting for them on the side road. We could not follow on foot.”

Tanner looked at Tank. “That ain’t good for her,” he said, and Tank tipped back his head in frustration.

“She got us out,” I said, feeling nothing but guilt. “She sacrificed herself to get us out. She asked us to help her with one thing, and we fucking failed.”

Silence thickened around us as I let the guilt drown me.

Then I saw a flash of blond hair peeking out from between Ruth and Stephen’s legs. I met Ruth’s eyes. “He didn’t get her?” I asked.

Ruth shook her head. “I think Phebe had left in here for safety . . . she . . . she saved her life.”

“What the fuck are y’all talkin’ ‘bout?” Ky asked, rocking on his feet. The brother was losing patience.

Ruth turned to Styx. “Phebe made me promise her something should she not make it out of the commune when the time came to flee. She asked me to find her sister on the outside world. Her name is Rebekah.”

Ky pushed out from the line. “That’s my wife. Rebekah . . . Lilah, Phebe’s sister. She’s my wife.”

Ruth took in a breath, but instead of replying, she turned around. When she faced Ky again, she was holding the hand of the little girl Phebe had saved. “Phebe was charged as guardian of this little girl.” Ruth winced. “She was recently branded as a Cursed Sister of Eve.”

I looked at Ky, but his gaze was fixed firmly on the little girl. Her headdress had gone, and her long blond hair was flowing down her back, her blue doe eyes staring up at the VP. “Fuck,” Ky whispered and swallowed.