Fall

“It was,” Dani said in a hollow voice. “It was my fault.”

“Accident,” I said slowly. “Dani, you couldn’t have prevented it.”

Her answer was to shrug. I knew it would take time, she’d just woken up and I knew I’d probably respond the same way.

“Hey.” I changed the subject. “How about we watch a movie or something? Are you up for it?”

She blushed.

“What?”

Dani leaned forward awkwardly, her tiny body nearly impossible to see underneath all the stuff connected to her. “Is it weird to watch a Jamie Jaymeson movie when he’s actually sitting in my room?”

“Nah.” I grinned. “He’s a total narcissist. He’ll probably eat it right up,” I teased.

She blushed harder.

“Let me grab him…” I patted her hand and went out of the room to retrieve the movie star.

“Everything okay?” He yawned.

“Yup.” I tried to hold my grin in.

“What?” His eyes narrowed.

“She really likes you.”

“Love, I played a superhero last year and saved the world like five times. Of course she loves me.”

“Hmm…” I tapped my chin. “And to think, I thought the cocky Jaymeson was long gone.”

“Oh, he’s still here.” He pulled me into his arms and softly kissed my mouth. “He’s just on his best behavior.”

“I wish he wasn’t.”

He took control of my mouth again. “Oh, don’t worry, my self control is hanging by a thread, and you, my dear, possess the scissors…”

I giggled and looked to the side as he kissed my neck. All the staff gathered around the nurse’s station watched with rapt attention.

Clearing my throat, I hit him in the arm and stepped back, probably blushing like a lunatic if the heat in my face was any indication.

“She wants to watch a movie.” I nervously tucked my hair behind my ear.

“Movie it is.” Jaymeson wrapped his arm around me. I sighed into his chest. Grief was strange. I’d never fully experienced it. One moment I wanted to cry, and the next I was laughing.

Shouldn’t I be crying every minute?

For some reason, even though my entire body screamed with sadness, having Jaymeson? Well, he was the umbrella to my rain cloud.

And I knew… my dad was the type to look at the positive. Always. If he were here… Tears welled again. If he were here, he’d ask me why I was wasting my time crying, when I should be celebrating life.

Celebrating what I had left.

A little sister.

Jaymeson.

Friends.

Life.

I could hear my dad’s words like he was actually there, speaking them over me. “Life is over in a blink of an eye — so why waste your time being anything but happy that you’ve been given another day to live?”

“Hey, you okay?” Jaymeson whispered in my ear.

“Yeah.” I nodded. “I really am.”

I thought of my dad’s smile. Of his reassuring hugs, of his playfulness, and his amazing ability to captivate everyone around him.

And my mom — to her, everything was funny. Life was hilarious, she’d say. She found joy in planting flowers and baking cakes for anyone who would eat them.

If I could describe my parents in one word, it would be joyful.

And I swore right then and there, that I wouldn’t let that legacy die with them.

****

We watched two movies. Dani fell asleep during the first thirty minutes of the second one, but Jaymeson wanted to keep watching.

He claimed he’d never seen one of his movies before.

He cringed about every five seconds and covered his eyes, alternating between saying, “Bloody awful,” and “Bloody terrible,” over and over again.

I decided I needed to record his expression. I pulled out my phone and snapped a picture. I was rewarded with a glare, and then he was back to watching himself, his face wincing as he delivered lines in the movie.

Once I saved the picture — I itched to Facebook it — to share it. Which was stupid because technically he didn’t have a Facebook.

Then again.

I didn’t either.

Bad call — I shouldn’t have deleted my account. With a sigh, I quickly logged back in and reactivated my account.

I had thirty messages from Jamie Hudson who had now changed his name to Jamie Hudson Jaymeson.

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: I’m sorry.

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: Please forgive me.

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: I’m an ass (he’d inserted a picture of an actual ass)

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: …Love

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: I think I may love you.

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: Never mind… I know I love you.

The messages were all similar, each and every one of them made me want to cry.

I wiped at a few stray tears and almost dropped my phone when it went off again. I had one new message from Jaymeson. With a smile I looked up, and he winked from his spot on the bed.

With a smile, I opened the message, and this time really did drop my phone before picking it back up again.

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: Say you’ll marry me.

Shaking, I answered.

Me: Are you asking?

Jamie Hudson Jaymeson: More like ordering. I’m Jamie Jaymeson — I don’t ask.

Me: That’s too bad, because I’m Priscilla S. Garcia and I need you to ask.

He didn’t respond. My heart deflated a bit as I stared at the phone and waited for the notification alert.