Gabriel's Inferno
It had been Scott’s choice. And when he stood up to dance to Tainted Love by Soft Cell, Rachel and Julia mocked him mercilessly. Aaron didn’t understand the attraction to eighties music or the humor in Scott’s slightly eclectic dance routine, but he smiled politely as he sipped his beer.
When the song was replaced by Don’t You (Forget About Me), Julia knew it was time to get another drink. She floated into the kitchen and found herself looking out the window at Gabriel and Richard, who were wearing their winter coats and sitting in two Adirondack chairs on the back porch.
“Hey, Julia.” Aaron came up behind her and pulled another beer from the refrigerator. “Corona?”
“Thanks.” Julia took the bottle gratefully.
“Lime?” He pointed to a series of lime sections in a bowl on the counter.
After watching her struggle to force the lime into the narrow opening of the bottle, he took pity on her. “Want me to do that?”
“Please.”
Aaron was a Corona specialist. He pushed the lime into the bottle, and capping the opening with his thumb, proceeded to tip the bottle upside down, sending the lime to the very bottom. When he righted the bottle, he carefully let the air pressure out at a snail’s pace and with a smug look, handed the bottle back to Julia.
“That’s the correct way to do it,” he said, grinning at her.
She took a quick pul from the bottle and smiled. He was right. It was good. “You’re a good man, Aaron.” Julia surprised herself by speaking the words aloud.
He reddened but returned her smile. “How are you doing?”
She shrugged. “I’m fine. Grad school is a lot of work, but I seem to be doing well. I’m applying to different doctoral programs for next year. I hope I get in somewhere.”
Aaron nodded, and he fixed her with a serious but sympathetic look.
“Rachel told me that Simon called. I don’t want to upset you, but we’re both really worried. Are you okay?”
Julia blinked slightly as she worked through what he’d said, realizing that Gabriel must have told Rachel about the phone call.
“I was scared. Even though I was so far away, he still found me. He wasn’t exactly happy with our conversation.”
Aaron gently patted her arm. “You’re with us. You’re part of our family, and we stick together. If he shows up, I’ll take care of him. Hell, I’ve been itching for a fight. What better way to work out your frustration than by teaching someone like him a lesson?” He grinned and took a swig of his beer.
Julia nodded but did not smile. “What’s happening with the wedding?
Rachel said that you picked a date, but when I asked her about it tonight she clammed up on me.”
He shook his head. “Don’t say anything to anyone, but we were planning to get married in July. That is, until Rachel saw her dad break down during grace. She pulled me aside after dinner and said that there was no way she could bring up the topic of a wedding now. So we’re back to where we were before — engaged with no fixed wedding date.” Aaron hung his head a little and wiped at his eyes with the back of one of his hands.
“What about a happy Aaron?” he muttered, his eyes momentarily hard.
He sighed and shook his head. “I didn’t mean that. I really didn’t mean that.
But I love her. I’ve loved her for years. I never wanted to live together — I wanted to marry her as soon as we graduated high school. But she always wanted to wait. The waiting is killing me, Jules.”
“Some people think that marriage is just a piece of paper. Rachel is lucky you think differently.”
“It’s not just a piece of paper. I want to stand up in front of her and God, and all our friends and make promises to her. I want her to be mine.
Not as my girlfriend, but as my wife. I want what Richard and Grace had, but some days I wonder if that’s ever going to happen.”
Julia shyly put her arm around Aaron’s shoulder and gave him a sideways, one-armed hug. “It’s going to happen. Don’t give up. Once Richard is out of the house and settled in his new life, Rachel will see that it’s okay for all of you to be happy again. Being in this house without Grace is hurting everyone. It’s so empty here without her.”
Aaron nodded and tipped back the rest of his beer. “Scott decided to play a slow song. Rachel will be wanting a dance. Excuse me.” He disappeared into the living room, leaving Julia alone with her perfect Corona and her imperfect thoughts.
Meanwhile, Richard and his eldest son sat outside enjoying Gabriel’s gifts — Cuban cigars that he’d smuggled from Canada and a bottle of Richard’s favorite Scotch, The Glenrothes.
“Grace would never have allowed this in the house,” Richard mused, blowing smoke rings toward the inky velvet of the November sky.
“I’m sure no one would mind now.”
Richard smiled at his son sadly. “But I would. For her. Thank you, by the way. These are probably the best I’ve ever had.”
“You’re welcome.”
They clinked glasses and wished one another cheers, falling silent to gaze out at the woods behind the house and up at the delicate strands of stars above.
“Julia looks well. Do you see much of her?”
Gabriel casually flicked the ash from his cigar into the ashtray between them. “She’s in my class.”
“She’s all grown up. She seems more confident.” Richard drew thoughtfully on his cigar. “Your university must agree with her.”
Gabriel shrugged.
“Grace loved her.” Richard watched his son’s face fail to register any reaction. “Now that I’m moving, we’re going to have to have a family meeting about the furniture and — other things. I know it’s going to be uncomfortable, but I think it would be better to have that conversation now rather than waiting until Christmas. You will be home for Christmas, won’t you?”
Richard’s lips pulled together. “You’re part of this family too. Isn’t there something you’d like? What about the armoire that Grace inherited from her grandmother? It’s always been in your room. Wouldn’t you like that?”
Gabriel studied his father for a moment. “I assumed you’d be taking all of Grace’s things.”
“It’s just not possible. There are a few things I can’t part with. But as for everything else…” He sighed. “Truthfully, this is the most important thing to me.” He held up his hand and showed Gabriel his wedding ring.
Gabriel was surprised he was still wearing it, but only for an instant.
Something told him that Richard would be wearing it for the rest of his life.
“Grace wanted her jewelry divided up. Rachel went through it yesterday.
There are a couple of things sitting on the dressing table in our room for you.”
“What about Rachel?”
“She’s happy with what Grace wanted her to have, and the same goes for Scott. In fact, they want Julia to have something, if you don’t object.”
Gabriel rubbed his eyes. “No, I don’t object. What did they have in mind?”
“Grace had two sets of pearls. One of them I gave to her, but one of them came from her parents or she bought them herself when she was a student. I’m not sure. Those are the ones that Rachel would like to give to Julia.”
“That’s fine.”
“Good. Before you leave, just be sure to talk to Rachel about the rest of it. You’ll want to take them with you.”
Gabriel nodded uncomfortably, focusing his attention on his cigar.
“Grace loved you. She didn’t believe in favorites, you know. But you were — special. She believed God brought you to her. She just wanted you to be happy.”
Gabriel nodded. “I know that.”
“Actually, she wanted you to find a nice girl and settle down, have children, and then be happy.” Richard smiled.
“That isn’t going to happen, Richard.”
“You don’t know that.” He reached out an affectionate hand and lightly gripped his son’s forearm. “Grace never gave up. Don’t you give up, either.
For a moment their eyes met. For a moment, both sapphire and gray were damp with tears.
Pray for me, Grace. How am I ever going to live without you? thought Richard.
The two men blew smoke rings across the porch, silently savoring their Scotch and their memories. But saying nothing more.
When everyone finally decided it was time for bed, they ascended the staircase almost two by two, like animals lumbering to Noah’s ark.
Gabriel held Julia back slightly so that they were the last to go up.
When everyone had disappeared into his or her respective chambers, he stood outside her bedroom door, gazing down at her with a somewhat hungry look on his face. Julia felt nervous all of a sudden and became fascinated by her feet.
He reached down with one hand and popped the top button of her blouse open, sliding his hand across her neck. “I’m sorry about this.” He touched the mark he’d made earlier.
Julia kept her eyes down.
“Julianne, look at me.” He coaxed her chin upward with a single finger, gazing at her with troubled eyes. “I didn’t mean to mark you. I know you don’t belong to me, but if you were mine, I would find a better way of showing it to the world than by turning your beautiful skin red or purple.”
Her eyes grew teary. Of course she was his. She had been his since she took his hand long ago and followed him into the woods.
“Wait here a moment.” He disappeared into his bedroom, returning with a familiar-looking British-racing-green cashmere sweater. “This is for you.” He handed it to her.
She accepted the sweater but gave him a puzzled look.
“I was worried that you wouldn’t be warm enough. I thought maybe you could wear this to the woods.”
“Thank you. But won’t you need it?”
He smiled knowingly. “I have others. And it pleases me to think that something of mine will be so close to you. If I had my way, you’d wear it all weekend.” He straightened his shoulders and took a step closer. “Perhaps this is a more humane way of marking you.”
Gabriel’s eyes shone in the dim light of the hallway. He took another step forward, as if he were about to draw her into an embrace, when Scott came lumbering out of his room, shirtless and wearing only a pair of boxer shorts. His boxer shorts had smiley faces on them.
At the sight of him, but before he could say something, Gabriel abruptly stuck his hand out. “Good night, Julia,” he said stiffly, shaking her hand.
Scott snorted loudly and scratched his ass as he walked toward the bathroom. As soon as the bathroom door closed, Gabriel pulled Julia into his arms and kissed her firmly on the lips.