Glamorama
"You don't even know where you are, Victor," she says grimly, but still smiling, even managing little waves at people who wave first. "You have no idea where you are."
"Show me."
"I can't afford to do that, Victor."
"You don't love him," I say. "I can tell. You don't love Bobby. It's a job, right? It's part of the plan, right? You're just acting, right?"
She says nothing.
Bobby parts a green velvet curtain and walks in wearing a dazzling Valentino tuxedo with a Prada backpack strapped over his shoulders that he didn't check and he surveys the room while lighting a cigarette, briefly blinded by paparazzi, and he just came from a party at Anahi and his hair looks wet and he starts moving toward us, grinning tightly as he strides across the dance floor.
"I think you're afraid of him," I say. "But you don't love him."
"Let's just get through this week, okay?' she says, tensing up.
"Tell me you love him-say it," I whisper. "Tell me you even like him."
The camera suddenly stops circling, holding us both in the frame tightly while we stare helplessly as Bobby comes nearer.
"Be quiet," she says, nodding at someone passing by in the shadows.
"I'll say something to him," I whisper. "I don't care."
"Let's lower the volume, Victor," she warns, smiling widely.
"I hope that's a humorous reference to something I didn't hear you say, Victor," Bobby says, leaning in and kissing Jamie on the mouth.
"Mmm," Jamie purrs, tasting her lips. "Margarita?"
"What are you talking about, Bobby?" I deliver the line in such a way that it's impossible to tell whether I'm feigning innocence or acting hard but Bobby's distracted by something across the room and in a suave way doesn't seem to care.
"I'm starving," Jamie says.
"What?" Bobby murmurs, craning his neck.
Vaguely panicked, I swallow another Xanax and focus on an MTV crew interviewing Nicole Kidman, who has a bindi on her forehead.
"Rhinebeck is in a rotten mood," Bobby says, staring over at Bruce slouched stony-faced in a booth on the outer limits of the party with Tammy beside him, gorgeous and shell-shocked, wearing sunglasses, both of them surrounded by a smattering of young Londoners.
"I think he'll be okay," Jamie says. "It'll be over soon."
"Yeah, but Tammy's getting damaged and that could screw things up," Bobby says. "Excuse me."
Bobby walks over to the booth, shaking hands with everyone who's impressed by his presence, and when he leans in, Bruce barely registers him and then Bentley strolls over with Marc Jacobs and finally Tammy looks up at Bentley as he shows her the watch he's wearing and she smiles briefly at Marc but the moment the entire booth bursts into cackling her face becomes a mask.
"Talk to him," I'm telling Jamie. "Tell him it's over between you two. Tell him it'll be okay."
"It'll be okay?" she asks. "You dummy," she mutters.
"I'm just trying to articulate how I'm really feeling."
"Your primary responsibility, Victor, at this juncture, is to just-"
"Shut up," I say softly.
"Get over me."
"You started this."
"This is just the tip of the iceberg," Jamie says, and then she can't help it-her face relaxes and glancing over at me her eyes acknowledge mine and she whispers quickly, "Please, Victor, just act low-key and we'll talk later."
"When?" I whisper back.
Bobby returns with Bentley and Marc Jacobs and Marc and Bentley just got back from checking out Marc's headquarters at the Pont Neuf and Marc's very nervous because one of the new hot designers is a teenage drag queen who gets his inspiration from a Chihuahua named Hector.
"I was trapped in a conversation with a Belgian iconoclast and Mr. Jacobs here saved me," Bentley says, waving a fly away.
Marc bows and then kisses Jamie on the cheek, nonchalantly nods my way and says, "Hey, Victor."
"Jesus, it's freezing in here," Bentley says, his breath steaming, and then, eyeing me, adds, "You're looking tired, Victor. Gorgeous but t red."
I'm cool, I'm cool," I say evenly. "Everything's cool."
"Here-you forgot this." Bobby hands Bentley the Prada backpack while Marc charms Jamie by making goofy faces behind Bentley's back, causing even Bobby to crack half a smile.