Healed (Scarred #2)(30)
Author: J.S. Cooper

“Do you really think so?” I looked to the sky. “Sometimes I wonder if I will ever truly be a man my mom can truly be proud of. Sometimes I don’t know if I am coming or going.”

“We all feel that way, Bryce.” She smiled softly. “I think that’s a part of life.”

“You mean this feeling will never go away?”

“I don’t know. But it can’t be bad can it? To question and to never stop the journey to being a better person.”

“I guess not. I guess we’re growing up now huh, Lexi?”

“It’s weird.” She laughed. “But I think we are. I don’t see you as the hot quarterback anymore and myself as the invisible flower.”

“You were never invisible.” I stroked her cheek. “But I do take offense at no longer being considered the hot quarterback.”

“Oh you’re still hot. Just not in a ‘I hope he asks me to Prom’ way.” She laughed and I took her hand and pulled her closer to me.

“I hope you never change, Lexi. I want you to sing Disney songs at the top of you voice, I want you to write letters of hope and love to any and everyone you want to, I want you to laugh and dance and scream and shout. I want you to keep believing in your dreams.”

“I don’t know, Bryce. Dreams aren’t always what they seem. Maybe I need to just come down to earth once and for all.”

“Lexi, if you didn’t dream we would never be here.” My voice was husky. “And I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be functioning right now, Lexi.” I closed my eyes and I pictured my mom’s face. “I wouldn’t have made it Lexi.”

“Yes you would have.”

“No.” I shook my head. “No, not like this.”

“Are you going to ask Anna to date you?” She grinned at me and I laughed at her eagerness.

“Now, that’s a slightly awkward question.” I laughed and shrugged. “I don’t know.” I felt a spark of electricity run through me as I thought about Anna. “I like her a lot but I don’t know if this is the time to try and start a relationship. I need to focus on myself now.”

“Wow, look at us. Two strong, single people.”

“What?” I frowned as she attempted a smile. “What about Luke?”

“I feel like I don’t even really know him.” Her voice trailed off. “He’s so much more than I ever knew and I ache inside, Bryce. Why didn’t he tell me, oh, so many things?”

“But you didn’t tell him everything either, Lexi, that’s not fair.”

“Life has a way of not being fair.”

“Don’t be hardheaded, Lexi. Don’t become bitter. Your best quality is your big heart.”

“Eh, I don’t know about that.”

“Trust me.”

“Okay.” She rolled her eyes and I laughed.

“Dear Bryce, I know you don’t know me but I wanted you to know that I think you’re a wonderful human being. I know you may be hurting right now and I know you may think that you have no one, but I want you to know that I’m someone who thinks a lot of you. I’m someone who cares and I just want you to know. That I pray for your safety every night. Stay safe, my dearest Bryce. Miss.” My voice trembled as I tried to remember her letter accurately and she looked at me with wide eyes.

“You memorized my letter?”

“Pretty much all of them.” I ran my hand through my hair, embarrassed. “It was quite easy really. I read them soo many times.”

“You did?”

“They meant the world to me Lexi.” I tried to explain how they had made me feel. “You reached me at the darkest point in my life. I didn’t know if I wanted to live, but your letters, your kind, beautiful letters, they saved me. I think that’s why I thought I loved you.”

“Words are powerful.” She nodded. “I understand.” She still had a sad look on her face and I sighed.

“Let’s go see Shelby. She’ll cheer you up. I promise.”

“I’m ready.” She looked at me nervously. “I hope she likes me.”

“She’ll love you. Of that I’m sure.”

Chapter 11

Lexi

I was grinning like an idiot when I got home. Shelby was a beautiful and loving child who had embraced Bryce and I immediately. The doctor had stayed in the room as we told her the news, just to make sure she wasn’t overwhelmed, and I saw a few tears in his eyes as she had yelped with pleasure and given us a huge hug upon hearing we were her family.

“You’re my brother and sister?” She had looked back and forth at us with amazement in her eyes.

“Yes Shelby.” Bryce had held her soo tenderly. I’d never seen him look that happy before. Never seen such a light in his eyes. “I’d like to adopt you as well, if you’d like that.”

She had nodded happily, clinging to his arm. I could tell that that had delighted Bryce. Here was someone who really, truly needed him. And loved him for who he was. He had a chance to start over. To be the man he always wanted to be. To be a man he could be proud of.

I laughed as I got out of the car. Maybe it was just as well that Bryce and I hadn’t worked out. I didn’t want to be a candidate for the Jerry Springer show, raising my sister with her brother as his lover. That was just a bit too much, even for my lax sensibilities.

“Hey, penny for them?” I heard Luke’s voice before I saw him and I fell back into the grass as Bongo came jumping on me. “Bongo, sit. Bongo,” Luke commanded the dog, who ignored him as he licked my face. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” I laughed as he pulled me up from the grass. “Naughty Bongo.”

“I think I need Anna to come help me train him,” he laughed and then groaned as he realized what he had said. “Sorry. I can find someone else.”

“No.” I shook my head. “It’s okay. I need to make amends with Anna anyway.”

“You’ve forgiven her?” He looked at me in surprise.

“I’m not sure that forgiven is the right word.” I shook my head. “What she did is a hard thing to get over, but I know I haven’t been the perfect friend and I miss her. Sometimes a hurt is about what’s beneath the initial shock and pain. I think Anna was hurting a whole lot more than I was.”

“I think you’re my perfect friend.” I felt Luke’s lips against mine and they felt so right, the perfect fit. I melted against him and I felt like I had come home when I felt his tongue slip into my mouth. I grasped his hair and pulled his face down so that I was kissing him harder. I didn’t want to ever leave this moment. It felt so perfect. His arms slid around my waist and he placed his hands into my back pockets. I giggled as he pinched my ass.