His to Take (Wicked Lovers #9)(71)
Author: Shayla Black

A lopsided smile crossed Joaquin’s face. “I’m glad it is. And don’t try to distract me. I meant that you’re not alone because I’m here.”

Bailey had suspected he meant that, but she wasn’t sure she believed him. After all, he wanted information from her that—if she even had it—sat locked deep in her memories. He’d been pretty patient, too. That had to be running out. Besides, if he wasn’t going to engage with his own family, she doubted he’d suddenly want to get involved with her on any deep level.

She tried to squirm away. If she didn’t, the lure of his comfort would be too much to resist. She’d throw herself against him and sob on his shoulder. He’d only feel more sorry for her. Her eyes would only swell up more. None of that appealed.

Joaquin held tight.

“Don’t worry. I’m good,” she assured him, then leaned over to the nightstand and reached for the box of tissues she’d brought from the bathroom earlier. He didn’t let go. “Your sister seems nice.”

“You’re changing the subject again.” His tone sounded like a warning.

“Joaquin . . .” Bailey searched for the right words, something to make him shut up without having to spill every worry and feeling. “Just leave it. I’m tired and frazzled. There were a lot of strangers there tonight. That’s usually uncomfortable for me.”

He gave her a considering stare. “Did you feel out of place?”

“A little. I barely knew anyone. I’m introverted, so conversation with people I don’t know can be tough.”

“If you wanted to leave sooner, all you had to do was say so. I thought you were excited to be at the party.”

“I was at first. Then . . .”

Being an outsider in a room filled with overwhelming love had gotten to her. Crap, she had to stop this little boo-hoo fest.

“Go on.”

“I don’t know. Callie said the party would be small, but it didn’t feel that way.”

“Yeah, you might have to take her concept of a ‘little’ gathering with a grain of salt. Her wedding is intimate, but her ‘small’ reception ballooned to two hundred people.” He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “You’re feeling better now that you’re back in this room?”

“Yeah.” Just more depressed than she wanted to admit. She was alive and had a better chance at staying that way because of Joaquin. She had to stop thinking of the loved ones she didn’t have and pull herself out of this funk.

He still wore a concerned frown. “Can I get you anything? You hungry?”

She shook her head. “I’ve been in a shame spiral since eating the bagel Callie brought me for breakfast. I never wolf down that many carbs. I’m so far off my exercise regimen.”

“Don’t worry about that, baby girl.” He stroked her face again. “You look perfect to me.”

Bailey couldn’t stop melting. If only he’d quit touching her and staring at her like she mattered to him, maybe she could. He wasn’t coming on to her. His touch didn’t feel sexual. The fact that he wasn’t trying to nail her but simply asking why she’d been crying got to her more.

“You don’t have to babysit me. Go back to the party.”

Joaquin shook his head as if he knew better. “I’m not leaving you alone. I saw how you looked at everyone, like you wished you were part of the group.”

New tears stung her aching eyes. Why couldn’t he just leave it alone? “Please don’t feel sorry for me.”

“I don’t. But I know you find it hard to be without family.”

Bailey tried to downplay the truth. “I know being with yours isn’t your thing. Most of us seek connections to the people who have similar experiences and values. Believing that someone has my back is huge to me.”

“I know what you’re saying.” He sent her a soft smile that made her heart turn over.

“I’m sorry to hear about your dad. Your sister said you were just a kid. How old?”

“Almost thirteen, so it was a long time ago.”

“Kata said it hit you hard. Is that why you don’t see your family much now?”

“Bailey.” He took her chin in hand and snagged her stare with his. “I’m fine. I wasn’t the one in tears tonight.”

But he stood apart from the people who would love him for a reason. “Just because you don’t cry doesn’t mean you aren’t hurting.”

He released her and let loose a long sigh. “But when you’re crying, it definitely means you are. I put you in this shitty mess. I haven’t been easy on you. I’m sorry. Let me help.”