Isabella (The Mitchell/Healy Family #2)(45)
Author: Jennifer Foor

“No. He doesn’t know. He hung up on me. The guy hates me for ruinin’ his life. I’m the last person he wants to talk to.”

“So you were planning on telling him?”

She refused to look me in the eyes.

When she didn’t answer, I yelled, “ANSWER ME. Were you going to tell him about the baby?”

“Yes.” She started sobbing again, but this time I couldn’t be her comfort. I was so distraught; so betrayed. Even though I didn’t have any kind of hold over her, I wanted to believe that she was mine; that she wouldn’t betray me after I’d stepped up and offered to help raise her child. Didn’t she understand that I wanted to be with her? Did she not know how much being a father meant to me? This wasn’t about my deceased wife, or even the child that I lost. This was about the life that I wanted us to have together. It was about being in love with her.

A few seconds is all it took for her to reached out for me. I pulled away and walked into the kitchen. Though I could see her, I knew I needed to be in another room. She sobbed more, while I stood there watching her, suffering from my own heartbreak. This wasn’t how I saw things going.

Isabella didn’t want me to be that baby’s father. She’d tried to tell me several times, but I kept pushing to be a part of her life. Her family would be leaving in a day, and at some point they’d find out that I was covering for her. I knew it wasn’t my problem, but it didn’t make it easier to take.

The fragile woman that I was crazy about was sitting on my couch crying, and I couldn’t bring myself to be near her. I grabbed my shoes and started putting them on. “What are you doin’?”

“I’m walking you back to the party so you can be with your family.”

“I came here to be with you, Rusty.”

“For what? Did you want to play head games with me again? Did you want me to take you in my room and f**k you so you could forget about him? I’m not your damn punching bag, Isabella. This hurts too much.”

“So you want me to leave?” Her question was obvious, so I guess she needed to hear me say the words.

“Yes. I need you to leave.”

She went running out the door. I finished tying my shoes and ran after her. It wasn’t hard to catch up, and to be honest I don’t think she could run full speed if she wanted to. While stopped at a tree I caught up to her and stood there waiting for her to breathe normally. “I’m sorry I hurt you, Rusty. I swear I didn’t mean it. None of this is about some hope of gettin’ back with Tate. You have to believe me.”

“Save it. The damage is done. Besides, this whole time you’ve been telling me that we couldn’t be together. It’s my fault for hanging on for so long. I get it. I’m older, with more baggage than anyone has to carry. You’re young and beautiful, with your whole life ahead of you. I don’t blame you for wanting more for yourself, but I can’t say I’m okay with losing hope that one day we could be something more.” I reached over and she let me touch her face. Her body began shaking when her arms wrapped around my back. I held her close to me as she bawled. It was practically impossible for me to be able to have her so close and picture watching her walking away. “This is killing me, Iz. Don’t you know how much I want to be with you and this baby? Haven’t I proven that?”

She lifted her head and nodded. “I want to be with you, too. That’s what I came to tell you. It’s not about Tate, or my family. I know you’re the right choice. I just didn’t want to string you along while I was tryin’ to figure it all out.”

I moved her hair off of her shoulders and kissed her forehead. “I don’t care if we fight, as long as it’s my bed you’re sleeping in at night. Being without you is pure hell. I don’t care what I’ve got to do to prove it. Just say you’ll give me a chance. Say you’re not running back to that guy. Please.”

We were standing in the middle of the woods. The noises of the bugs kept it from being silent around us. In the distance the music still played, letting me know that nobody at the party would be able to hear us arguing. “How do I know you want me, and not just a reminder of the family you lost?”

“You’re going to have to trust me, Iz. For now, all I can assure is that I’m not going anywhere. If you want me, I’m all in. I may have first been attracted to you because of my family, but the moment I met you that all changed. You don’t remind me of what I lost, you show me what I have to look forward to. Can’t you see that? Can’t you understand that when I look at you I see my future?”

She put her hand up to her face and took a step back, as if she was in disbelief. I didn’t know if I should keep talking or give her a minute to take it all in. I knew how stressful this all was on her. She was dealing with so much all at once. The anxiety was overwhelming even for me. “I wish you and everyone else could understand how difficult this is for me.” I watched her face curl up as another bout of sobs came.

“I may not be able to feel exactly what you’re feeling, but I certainly know what it’s like to be completely lost. Let me be there for you. Who knows where this road’s going to go, but we take the ride together. I may not have much to offer you right now, but I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“I can’t ask you to make that kind of commitment. It’s not fair. We’ve got a lot to learn about each other.”

She had a point. “Fine. Let’s give it a go. If you decide that I’m not what you want than you can kick me to the curb.” I ran my hands up her arms and pulled her close to me again. “But if you fall hopelessly in love with me I promise I’ll be there waiting.”

“I just don’t want to hurt you, Rusty. You’re a good man. You don’t deserve to have some kind of built in family. I know you’re tryin’ to help me out and be kind, but it’s not fair if I let you make this kind of commitment without promises.”

I leaned in and kiss her slowly, playing her tongue against mine. Her lips trembled against mine, and I could feel her wet tears rubbing on my cheeks. Our emotional embrace signified what we both wanted. I knew it was going to be difficult, and we’d probably have more hard times ahead, but she needed me and I was going to be there.

When we both pulled away she stood there staring at me, with only the light of the moon giving us something to go on. “You’re not goin’ to give up, are you?”