It Ain't Me, Babe

“Maddie, calm. You are safe now. I am here.” I looked up at Lilah and mouthed, What is wrong with her?

Lilah swallowed and looked away. “They wanted divine retribution. The elders became obsessed with punishing the sisters for your disobedience. They were livid that you had somehow fled the commune and that you were out there living in sin.” She took a deep, sobering breath. “They said the Cursed were shameful, a hex on The Order: you… Bella… They said your bloodline was tainted with evil. Said Satan used you as vehicles for temptation.”

This time I stilled. Maddie. She was of my bloodline. Did they believe she too was a vehicle of temptation and sin?

I held my sister even tighter.

“They said they needed to make sure Maddie did not go the same way… That they had to break her once and for all. Exorcize her demons.”

Maddie was now crying uncontrollably. Her heart pounded against mine and her chest jerked with the intensity of her sobs. “They took her so brutally for hours and hours until she passed out. One after the other… sometimes at the same time. They made me watch but I could do nothing. Then they turned their attention to me…”

“How often? How often did this happen?” I asked, tightly squeezing Lilah’s hand in support.

“Several times a week…” She glanced down at the floor, then back up again. “Every week since you have been absent. It truly has been a living hell. Trapped in this room, taken until we bled, time after time. Mae, we cannot take any more… We cannot keep living like this…”

We huddled together until all the tears that could be shed had been shed. Eventually, Maddie shuffled back to sit before me. Her hand stayed welded to mine though. I do believe she planned never to let it go.

“Where have you been, Mae?” Lilah asked. “What was the outside world like?”

Where do I begin?

“Sisters, it is like nothing you can imagine—the technology, the way people live. It is so, so different. When I left here, the elders found me at the perimeter fence.”

Maddie jumped and frowned and I rubbed the back of her hand. She calmed.

“I only just made it to the other side of the fence, but not before Gabriel’s dog attacked me. My leg was badly injured, yet I managed to run. I made it to the edge of the forest and discovered a country road. A truck picked me up a short time later. The woman driver, a good lady, drove me far, far away.”

“What… what is a truck?” Maddie asked quietly. I cast her a small smile.

“It is a large vehicle, like the prophet’s car but much much bigger.” Her green eyes widened, so did Lilah’s, as they tried to imagine such a thing. I wondered what they would make of a motorbike, of the Hangmen’s Harleys and Choppers. I realized at that moment just how sheltered I must have seemed to the Hangmen when they found me in the compound believing I was in hell.

“And then what?” Lilah pushed, eager to hear more. I imagined, to her, it sounded like a fictional story.

I shuddered and continued. “I was losing blood… dying, I think…” Maddie gasped and her hands began to shake. “The driver of the truck dropped me at the side of a road and I found shelter in a compound of sorts. Next thing I knew, I woke up in a strange room, alone and confused.”

I shuffled forward and tugged at their hands. “Sisters, outside is not evil like we have been told. It is filled with wonder and good people. Yes, it is dangerous at times, sinful at other times, but no more than here. I made new friends, discovered who I truly am… and… I fell in love.”

This time they both gasped loudly. “Love?” Maddie questioned, clearly in shock. Love was not something females experienced here at commune

“Yes, love. Such deep love with the most incredible man. He is strong, protective and cares for me greatly. I have been with him all this time. I love him so much, but…”

“But what?” Lilah urged me to continue, her normally restrained features had become animated.

“There was another there. Someone I believed to be a friend.” I laughed mirthlessly. “Foolish me, I could not have been more wrong—”

“Is that so?”

I craned my head in the direction of the doorway. There stood Rider—no, Brother Cain. Rider was a falsehood, a ruse to blind the Hangmen to his real purpose.

Rider is dead to me.

Cain’s formidable frame seemed to engulf the entire room. He was dressed all in black, his long hair down and falling over his shoulders—just like every other disciple. He just looked plain wrong without his standard jeans and cut.