Love’s Suicide
Author: Jennifer Foor

Prologue

September 11th 2001

It was just like every other school day in Washington, D.C. The traffic was wretched and my mother cussed under her breath the whole time. After she’d dropped me and my neighbors, Branch and Brooks, off for seventh grade, we walked inside and went to our lockers. I felt a little weird being around them after experimenting with French kissing with both of them the night before.

It wasn’t like it was a big deal. We’d spent every day together since we were infants. Our parents being friends made it all the worse by basically forcing us to do everything together, all the time, even when we didn’t want to.

Branch, being older than his brother by nearly four minutes, was the one who came up with the idea to begin with. It was always the understanding that he was in charge of our friend circle, even though Brooks and I were usually the ones enjoying hanging out and not worrying what other’s thought of us.

He said we were twelve and needed to know how to do it, so that when it happened for real we’d be prepared.

Even at my young age I wasn’t stupid. Branch always had ulterior motives and it was his way of admitting that he wanted me to be his first.

I told him that I would only agree to it, if we included Brooks.

So the three of us pinky-promised and went out into the tree house to test out our abilities, hoping that we wouldn’t get caught by any of our parents.

It was kind of funny because, even though it had been Branch’s idea, Brooks ended up going first. Branch used the excuse that Brooks would need the most practice, but we both knew it was for the simple fact that he was scared. The only time Branch let his twin do anything first was when he was afraid of doing it himself. Brooks was always Branch’s guinea pig and I hated that about him.

So there we were, me and Brooks, slowly moving in toward each other with our lips parted. I couldn’t look at him, in fear that he was also looking at me. When we first made contact, our eyes shot open and we heaved away, scared to express what was happening.

I wasn’t sure about Brooks, but when his lips touched mine it felt different than two friends exploring something for the first time. It excited me and made me feel nervous. There were butterflies in my stomach and also the urge to vomit.

Branch laughed at us. “I knew you wouldn’t do it right.”

Then Brooks shocked me. He moved forward with an annoyed expression on his face. “Come on, Kat, let’s try it again.”

I leaned forward and felt his soft lips touching mine. We held them together, and then, at the same moment, we touched tongues. I had to admit that a tiny sensation went from my lips through each of my fingertips. The feelings were back in my stomach and I liked it so much that I didn’t want to stop.

Even though we’d promised to never tell anyone, I felt privileged. I knew that all of the girls would be envious, on account of the boys being so handsome. Not only was I getting to kiss Brooks, but I was also going to do it with Branch too.

Brooks and I separated and smiled at each other briefly before Branch shoved him aside and leaned in for his turn. “Let me show you both how it’s done.”

To be honest they both kissed similar, as if they’d read how to do it and practiced on their hands at the same time.

An hour later we were back to playing spot light in the backyard, like we did on most fall nights. One thing was different though. While Branch went running to the door the moment his mother announced that dinner was ready, his brother didn’t follow him.

When I started to head next door to my yard, I felt someone grab my hand. Brooks smiled at me. His blue eyes were dreamy and I knew why the girls wanted to be his steady girlfriend, even if we were just children. “Thanks for being my first kiss, Kat.” I loved when he called me that. It was his special name for me.

I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. “Thanks for being mine, Brooks.” I twisted my body from side to side out of being nervous. It was so weird. We’d done everything together our whole lives and I knew I was acting ridiculous.

He looked down at the ground and kicked some rocks. “So, can we try it one more time, so we’ll be sure we got it right?”

I shrugged and leaned in to do it again, all the while celebrating it silently in my mind. We didn’t hold hands or touch each other, like a couple that was going out would do. Instead, we stood with our bodies apart and just leaned in.

This kiss lasted longer. We kept moving our tongues around until his mother called out his name again.

He pulled away, gaping at me. “I gotta go.”

“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye, Kat.”

I didn’t wait for him to turn around, to see if he even did. Instead, I went running towards the gate that connected our yards. He was probably wondering if I was going to tell someone, but I wouldn’t. He could always trust me.

After all, he was one of my best friends in the whole world. He’d never be cruel to me or say I was horrible, and I also knew he’d forever keep it a secret between us.

Branch was the one that liked to brag. He would be the one that I fretted about.

So, on our ride to school, none of us said much. My mom asked us if something was going on that she needed to know about, but we were never going to tell her. She’d punish me from hanging out with them and I couldn’t imagine that ever happening, even if it were temporary.

While standing at my locker, Branch came over and leaned against the one next to it. “I saw you and my brother last night.”

I put my books inside and closed the door. “So what? We were just practicing.”

“Whatever. You know he doesn’t like you that way, right?”

I rolled my eyes and started walking in front of him, passing Brooks at his locker. He caught my stare, but never even smiled. His attention was on his brother and for some reason he seemed annoyed.

When the three of us got into class I was feeling a little uneasy. If anyone found out that I’d kissed both boys I’d be called a lot of unfair names, which none would be true. The only thing I was guilty of was being in love with both of them.

Our little private school only had a hundred students and went from kindergarten to twelfth grade. Our class had eleven students, and was one of the largest. We stood, like every morning, to say the pledge of allegiance. I placed my hand on my heart and looked up at the flag.

All of the sudden we heard someone scream and go running down the hallway. Over the loud intercom system, the pledge was stopped and a bunch of commotion was taking place.