Love’s Suicide(107)
Author: Jennifer Foor

“You didn’t sleep either?”

I shrugged, even though he couldn’t see me. When I heard heavier feet walking up the stairs I got excited. His voice didn’t startle me as I noticed the line had gone dead and he was talking from outside of the bedroom. “I couldn’t get comfortable.”

“Me either. Listen, its a couple more hours. Get all dolled up for me and meet me out back. I can’t wait to see you, Kat. You’re going to look so perfect.”

“I’m going to look fat. You better say a prayer that this dress still fits me. I haven’t tried it on for two weeks, and I swear I’ve gained ten more pounds.”

“Being four months pregnant will do that, but just to be clear, you’re not fat. You’re beautiful.” His statement gave me butterflies. “Imagine if you would have gotten pregnant over the summer. Then you’d be huge,” he teased.

I laughed and let my head drop back down on my pillow. “Are you just going to stand at the door all morning torturing me?”

He tapped twice before he spoke. “I came up to tell you that I love you. I’ll see you in bit.”

I heard him going back down the stairs before waiting for my reply. I suppose Brooks didn’t need to hear it back. He’d always known it, even when I couldn’t admit to myself.

Once I heard the kitchen door shut, I cuddled up with Brooks’ pillows and felt comfortable. Before I fell asleep I thought about my future with Brooks and our children. It was hard not to smile, even if it was for my own benefit. I had more than I could dream of and through the enduring pain that I’d put myself and the people around me through, somehow we’d found our way back to each other.

Sure, I had regrets, especially the ones concerning Bobby. Even at his worst, I hated that he was gone.

One thing that offered me peace was finding an old life insurance policy and leaving it all to his parents, including his business. They still weren’t speaking to me, and I didn’t expect them to ever be able to, but at least they knew that I wasn’t heartless.

On his headstone I’d added “Loving Father” and even donated a bench in his name courtesy of the church that had basically shunned me.

People could hate and judge me forever, but it would never bring Bobby back. Indirectly I knew his death was my fault. I’d accepted that I couldn’t change what had happened, but I could strive to be a better mother and wife. I could feel my eyes welling up with tears as I thought about him.

Then my mind went to Brooks.

I was overwhelmed by fulfillment.

Being with him wasn’t about having a heated affair, or betraying my friends and family. It was about accepting that he would be the only man to ever have my heart.

Part 2 told by: Brooks

Cold feet.

It was something I’d never have with Katy. She was mine and the piece of paper making it legal wasn’t going to change anything.

I’d been wondering how I was going to sneak into the house without seeing her, but B made it the perfect excuse. Before we headed back to my parents, I tucked a card underneath of the package of peanut butter cups on the countertop.

She’d get a kick out of the card considering it was sentimental. Being that it was both our wedding day and Valentine’s day, a particular special day for someone that carried the name, I was more than excited to give it to her.

When Katy opened my card, she’d probably cry. The poor woman had been a babbling mess with her pregnancy hormones.

I smiled thinking back to the day we found out. On the first day of her missed period, I drove to the store and bought the test, while she and B waited at home for me. I always got a kick out of seeing my daughter standing at the window, watching for me to pull in the driveway.

They’d met me at the door and the three of us rushed into the bathroom, as if it were a tornado headed for the house.

Three minutes later we celebrated.

Our lives had changed for the better, especially since we’d moved back home. Katy smiled everyday, making me feel like I was doing my job, keeping her happy and safe.

As far as our daughter, well let’s just say that she was spoiled beyond belief and had become both of my parent’s reasons for breathing.

Bug wasn’t just my daughter. Seeing what Katy and I brought into the world, and knowing that she helped bring us back together, made me the happiest man on the planet.

My brother was in the kitchen when we both walked inside. B spotted him and ran up to him, smacking into his legs. “Good morning, pretty girl. Uncle Branch has something for you.”

He leaned down and handed her a stuffed bear holding a heart. When he squeezed it, it said ‘I love you’.

B hugged it and brought it to show me. “Daddy, look.”

“I see it. Go say thank you.”

She hugged Branch and ran into the living room before we could tell her nobody else was awake, and being that it was such a special day, I didn’t care if she woke up the whole house.

While waiting for her to come back, Branch cleared his throat and got my attention. “I guess it’s not necessary to ask if you’re ready for today.”

I raised my eyebrows and let out and air-filled laugh. “Yeah, I’ve been ready for this my whole life.”

My brother looked down at his cup of coffee as he replied. “I shouldn’t have been such a dick to you when we were kids.”

I leaned across the counter and looked my brother in the eyes. “None of it matters anymore. She’s mine forever, man.”

Branch shook his head and laughed. “She always was.”

I don’t know why hearing him saying that got to me the way it did, but I felt myself getting choked up. Far be it from me to show my brother that he’d affected me, I quickly turned and refilled my cup. “You got that right.” Inside though, I felt like Branch was finally able to accept that nothing could keep her from me, not time, not distance, and certainly not him.

The room filled with voices and for the next couple of hours things were chaotic. Melissa and my mother headed next door to be with Kat, while I got everything ready, including myself.

Just like I’d promised her, I was standing there at the arbor waiting. Since it was winter, and the weather was unpredictable in D.C., we took precautions and rented a tent with heaters. One giant tent filled our two yards and I had to admit that it was quite toasty when the plastic doors were closed.

The moment I saw her walking out of our back door, my knees started to get weak. She took a few steps and wrapped her arm inside of my father’s. Even with her face covered by a tiny sheer veil I could already tell she was stunning. Bug came running up the aisle, instead of walking. When she realized that she’d forgotten to throw out the flowers, she went back and tossed them going in both directions. The tiny crowd of neighbors and friends laughed, but then gave all of their attention to Katy.