Love’s Suicide(81)
Author: Jennifer Foor

I watched the color leave his face and knew that I’d hit a nerve. “What? You knew?”

I shook my head. “No. I didn’t know at first. We were together twice and he never told me. I can’t blame him. Though, at first, I wanted to kill him.”

Branch covered his face with both hands. “God, I can’t believe this.”

“I couldn’t believe it either. More than that, I couldn’t believe that the man I was planning on marrying had conned me into loving him. Did you really think that I’d be happy and that Brooks would never tell me the truth?”

He turned to me, like he was the one betrayed. “He gave me his word that I could have you.”

“He told me no that night.” It was partly the truth, but I was actually starting to feel bad. “That night at the hotel, you were so drunk. You said some horrible things and Brooks just wanted me to feel better. He found me on the roof crying, and everything happened so fast. I know you could never understand and that you’ll probably hate me forever, but I’ve never felt something so powerful as when I’m close to him. It doesn’t matter how long we’re apart, or what’s standing in our way, it’s always there. Branch, I’m so sorry that I hurt you. I left because I couldn’t face you that next morning. I couldn’t look you in the eyes and tell you that I was in love with your brother. I felt so ashamed.” I swallowed the lump forming in my throat before I could continue. “The thing is, you knew it all along. You’d been keeping us apart because you knew what we had, didn’t you? Do you have any idea what I’ve gone through because of all of this? I ran away from the only family I have left. I had a child that I couldn’t tell anyone about, because I thought they all hated me, including your brother. I moved to a town with nothing but the clothes in my suitcase. You could have prevented all of this. Brooks didn’t have to miss the birth of his daughter.”

“How did you know she was his?”

“I did the math and the doctors gave me a three day window of when I conceived. Then we learned you were sterile, which by the way, thanks for that. Another lie that you went along with to get me to marry you.”

Finally he cut in. “Okay. I get the damn point. I was a shitty brother and a lying boyfriend. It doesn’t change that fact that you were only with me because you thought he didn’t want you. I was your f**king consolation prize, so yeah, I lied. I didn’t want either of you to be happy, so I did what I had to do. I gave you everything you wanted and you still ran to him. All you had to do was be faithful for one night and you couldn’t. You had to be with him. Let me know something, Katy. Would you have still married me if I hadn’t caught you with him?”

I shook my head, knowing the answer before he finished the sentence. “No. I think I knew I wasn’t going to marry you the moment he walked through the door.” Then I really felt bad. “Branch, if you ever loved me, in any way, you’d know that I wasn’t with Brooks because I wanted to hurt you. I was with Brooks because I couldn’t stop myself. Every bone in my body calls for him. When he touches me it’s electric. We both loved you and it was the only reason that I walked away from you and from him.”

Branch started to get choked up and my anger was already gone, but was now placed with remorse. I hurt for him, feeling betrayed by his own flesh and blood. I put my hand on his and he looked up at me. “I did love you, Katy. It wasn’t the right kind of love, but it was real. I can’t live like this anymore. I’ve got a good life and Melissa’s a great woman. I love her, and I know we’ll be happy. She’s okay with having to adopt and I don’t keep secrets from her. Except for one.”

I looked at him and felt confused. “One?”

“For so long I’ve told her that I hated you. I wanted you to be miserable and poor. Then I saw your daughter and I realized what I’d taken from you. You don’t have to remind me what I did. Knowing that I can’t have children has been difficult for me to come to grips with. Seeing that Brooks had a child is when it really hit me. You’re right, Katy. I kept you apart and it’s my fault you ran away from Brooks. I’m sorry he wasn’t there for you. I’m sorry none of us were, because family is supposed to stick together, no matter what. It’s time I admit it out loud.” He took a deep breath and wiped the tears off of his face. “I want you to be happy with my brother, because he’s loved you for as long as I can remember and I’m sorry for keeping you apart. I suppose I deserved to hear about him sneaking in your room. He always was your hero.”

I let out a laugh. “He still is.” I couldn’t tell Branch that we were running from my abusive ex. “I thought he’d hate me for keeping my pregnancy from him, but he didn’t.”

Branch reached over and put his hand on my ankle. At first, I felt strange having him touch me. Sure, I’d slept with him for years, but something had changed. I no longer felt any kind of connection to Branch, and I knew why. Branch had been right. I’d been settling for him, when all the while Brooks was who I was supposed to be with. “Can we please be a family again? I’d really like to get to know my niece, and Melissa misses you. She thinks you hate her.”

“Did you sleep with her before or after I was gone?”

He put his hand out when he stood up. I let him help me off the bed and we started to walk out of the room. He laughed. “Yeah, we probably shouldn’t talk about that, seeing as you slept with my brother and all. When I took Melissa to bed is irrelevant.”

“Fine.”

I took two steps and saw Brooks sitting on the couch with his parents. He smiled when he saw us and I smiled back. Melissa was on the floor playing with B. “It’s good to be home, Branch.”

And it really was, good to be home. I was getting my life back; the one I’d never thought I’d see again. I could see my future in the horizon and Brooks was a huge part of it.

Chapter 47

It took a few hours for everyone to relax. Melissa and Branch turned all of their attention to B while I helped out in the kitchen. Brooks and Walt ran out to get her a swimming ring for the pool and a new bathing suit. We were also running low on diapers. It was funny to me knowing that two grown men were shopping for a little girl.

While I sat watching B’s new uncle and soon to be aunt swoon over her, Danica handed me some vegetables to cut up. “You know, I’ve never seen Branch around a small child before. It’s quite entertaining. Although I always knew Brooks would be a good father. He’s always been nurturing, caring about others and ignoring his own needs.”