Love’s Suicide(99)
Author: Jennifer Foor

“Woman, you’ve got a lot to learn about the things I know.” He bent down and touched the tip of the wet brush to my nose.

I reached over and ran my hands up his camouflage t-shirt. “I’m a more hands on kind of learner.”

He sat the paint can down on the nightstand and hovered over my body. “Let’s get started then.”

Even though I was aware of everything going on in my life, taking a reprieve from it all was exactly what I needed.

Chapter 57

The funeral service for Bobby didn’t take place until five days later, being that his body had to be transported and then prepared. They assured me that we’d be able to have an open casket and that his head injury wouldn’t be noticeable.

My worry increased as the days got closer, and while my house was finally getting back to looking new again, I felt like my life was a spinning tornado.

Danica continued offering her support and spending every second with her granddaughter. I’d managed to make progress getting around better on my own and insisted on attending the service by myself.

Although Brooks had been staying at my house, and even sleeping next to me in my new bed, we weren’t exactly talking about our future. He knew I needed time to sort my problems out before I could focus on our relationship.

So I did what every person does on the day of a funeral. I put on a little eye makeup, wore a black dress and grabbed my sunglasses.

My anxiety was through the roof as I pulled into the tiny parking lot at the church and found that it was already full of cars.

Then I spotted Dave, standing outside talking to his father-in-law, the pastor. Both of them stared as I turned off the vehicle and started to climb out.

It took me a good bit to make my way to where they stood. Although I was mobile, my hip still hurt when I went from sitting to walking.

When I got within four feet from Dave, he put his hand up motioning me to stop. “Hold up a minute. Where do you think you’re goin’, Katy?”

“Inside. Where else would I go?”

He shook his head. “Yeah, I don’t think that’s a good idea. Do everyone a favor and just go home. We’re all here to remember our friend, not sit in the same room with the person that ended his life.”

I knew they felt that way, but hearing him say it in front of the pastor, and him saying nothing in my defense, made it all even more bitter. “I have every right to be in there. He was my husband and I loved him.”

“You loved him?” Dave spit on the ground in front of me. “You loved him so much that you had him arrested for a crime he wasn’t capable of doin’. You know that man never laid a hand on you, but yet you had him arrested for it, didn’t ya?”

“You think I inflicted those bruises all of those times on myself?”

“It don’t even matter what I think you’re capable of. If that weren’t bad enough, you took your daughter and ran off with your lover, so he couldn’t even see her. All he wanted to do was work things out with you.”

“No, he wanted to hurt me worse.” I was crying, and begging for him to listen to me. I didn’t make up being beat on and I sure as hell wouldn’t have left town if I didn’t feel like I was in danger.

“Katy, do us all a favor and spare us the drama. Sarah’s so upset because she brought you into Bobby’s life. She doesn’t need to see you here.”

“Please, Dave. Please, just let me pay my respects. I have every right to say goodbye to him. You couldn’t be more wrong about me. I swear, I would never want this for anyone, especially Bobby.”

He looked back at his father-in-law, who took a step toward me. He placed his hand on my shoulder. “Bobby told me things during our sessions. He had his own demons, but I’ve got to be respectful of my daughter. How about we meet later and you can say your goodbye’s then?”

I heard a voice behind me and I didn’t have to turn around to see who it was. “How about you get off that high horse and let the girl through? Isn’t this the Lord’s home where everyone is welcome?”

Dave started to haul ass toward Brooks. I grabbed the back of his jacket and held him back, while Brooks crossed his arms over his chest, not afraid of what was coming. “Get your boyfriend out of here, Katy. My best friend is dead because of you. Leave now, before someone gets hurt.”

Brooks was wearing his Army dress uniform and I’d never known him to look more handsome. At the same time, I was caught in the middle of a war in the church parking lot. While holding onto the back of Dave, I knew I had to do something before our scene became the most remembered moment of my husband’s funeral. “Dave, please. We’ll go. Please just stop this.”

He shoved me with his shoulder as he walked by me and I watched Brooks explode in front of me. He charged full-force at Dave and I watched them both fall to the ground.

I reach down and grabbed Brooks’ arm before he could pound it against Dave’s face. “Please stop. You need to leave, Brooks. Please, just go.”

He shoved Dave to the ground before standing up and dusting off his clothes. “I came here for support, because I knew they were going to treat you like shit.”

I touched his hand with mine. “I can handle them without you interfering. Just go before it gets worse.”

He pulled his hand away from me and I saw anger in his eyes. “You know what, I’m sick of trying.”

I wanted to run after him, but had to worry about Dave before I could do anything else. I turned to face him. “I’m going in that church and I’m saying goodbye to my husband. You can spit on me and call me names, but I’m still going. Whatever you think of me, whatever you want to tell people, you’ll never begin to understand how much his death had devastated me. You think I don’t know that he was once a good man? I’m sorry he’s gone, but I never lied about anything, not to him and certainly not to the police.”

I pushed him as I walked by and dared him to put another hand on me. I was going to say goodbye to Bobby and there wasn’t a damn person on the planet that was going to stop me.

I don’t know what I expected, walking in there and seeing a made up version of him lying in that casket. Immediately I was in tears. People moved out of my way and I could hear their whispers. At one point I even heard the word whore. I focused my eyes on Bobby and touched his cold hands. It was hard to see through my glossy eyes. “I just came here to say I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for everything, Bobby. Please, you’ve got to forgive me. I never meant to hurt you. I’ll never be able to forgive myself for taking your life away. I wish you never met me, so that you could still be here with your friends and family.”