Maybe Not (Maybe #1.5)(7)
Author: Colleen Hoover

I think we may have just bonded.

• • •

After I make it home, the first thing I do is set timers on every single porn on pay-per-view. I spend the next few hours fast-forwarding through most of them, pausing it any time it lands on a girl that even remotely resembles her. I take into account that she may have been wearing a wig, so I can’t rule women out simply based on their hair color.

Ridge takes a seat next to me on the couch and I consider putting the TV on caption for him, but I don’t. Let’s be honest, pornos aren’t known for their riveting story lines.

Ridge elbows me to get my attention. “What’s with this new fascination?” he asks, referring to the fact that I’ve done nothing today other than watch porn after porn.

I don’t want to be honest, so I just shrug. “I like porn.”

He nods his head slowly and then stands up. “I’m not gonna lie,” he signs. “It’s really awkward. I’ll be out on my balcony if you need me.”

I pause the TV. “You worked out any new songs yet?”

Ridge looks frustrated when I ask him this. He shakes his head. “Not yet.” He walks away and I feel bad for asking. I don’t know what’s changed over the last few months, but he’s not the same. He seems more stressed out than usual, and it makes me wonder if he and Maggie have been fighting. He says they’re fine, but he’s never had a problem writing music for the band before, and everyone knows the number one source for musical inspiration comes from relationships.

Ridge and Brennan are both musically inclined and I’ve always been a little bit jealous in that regard. Granted, I’m jealous of Ridge in a lot of ways. He just seems to have been born with a certain level of maturity, and I’ve always envied that about him. He’s not impulsive like I am and he also seems to take people’s feelings into consideration more than I do. I know Brennan has always looked up to him and I definitely do, too, so seeing him struggling with whatever is going on in that head of his is tough. He knew what he was getting into when he began dating Maggie, so I’m not sure if he’s growing unhappy in his relationship with her or if maybe he’s concerned she’s unhappy with him. Whatever it is, I’m not sure what I can do to help him.

I don’t think I can help him.

I give my focus back to the TV and fast-forward through at least three more films before I realize it’s already eleven and I’m late picking up Bridgette.

Shit. Time flies when you’re watching porn.

I spend the next several minutes in fast-forward, making it the ten miles to Hooters in record time. When I pull up, she’s standing outside with her arms folded across her chest, shooting daggers at my car. She swings the door open and climbs in. “You’re late.”

I wait until she slams the door before pressing on the gas. “You’re welcome for the ride, Bridgette.”

I can feel the anger radiating from her. I don’t know if it’s simply because I’m late picking her up or because she had a shitty night at work, but I’m not about to ask. When we pull into the complex, she jumps out of my car before I even have it in park. She stalks up the stairs and slams the front door shut.

When I reach the apartment, she’s already in her bedroom. I try to be understanding, but this is just . . . it’s fucking rude. I give her a ride to and from work and all she does is bitch at me? You don’t have to be taught manners to know how inappropriate that kind of behavior is. Hell, I’m one of the most inconsiderate people I know, and I would never treat someone like she’s treating me.

I walk to my bedroom and head straight for the bathroom. She’s already in there, standing at the sink, washing her face. “Again with the failure to knock?” she says with a dramatic roll of her eyes.

I ignore her and walk to the toilet. I lift the lid and unzip my pants. I try to keep my smile in check when I hear her scoff at the fact that I just started taking a piss with her in the bathroom.

“Are you serious?”

I continue to ignore her comments and flush the toilet when I’m finished. I leave the lid up on purpose and step over to the sink, right next to her. Two can play at this asshole game, Bridgette.

I grab my toothbrush and squirt toothpaste on it and then start brushing my teeth. She elbows me when I get in the way of the sink, attempting to push me aside. I elbow her right back and continue brushing. I look up at our reflection in the mirror and like what I see. I’m several inches taller than her. My hair is darker than hers, and my eyes are brown compared to her greens. We complement each other, though. Standing next to each other like this, I can see how we could make a good-looking couple. We’d probably even make some good-looking children.

Shit.

Why am I allowing thoughts like this to fester in my brain?

She finishes wiping the makeup from her face before grabbing her own toothbrush. Now we’re both fighting for sink space, brushing with more force than our teeth have probably ever been brushed. We take turns angrily spitting into the sink, throwing elbows at each other between every turn.

When I’m finished, I rinse off my toothbrush and put it back in the holder. She does the same. I cup my hands under the stream of water and bend forward to take a sip when she shoves me aside, causing me to splash water all over the counter. I wait until she has water in her own hands, then I shove her arms, watching the water splash everywhere.

She grips the counter and takes a deep, calming breath. It doesn’t help, though, because she splashes her hand through the faucet stream, sending a handful of water straight at my face.

I close my eyes and try to put myself in her shoes. Maybe she’s had a rough day. Maybe she hates her job. Maybe she hates her life.

Whatever her reason for acting the way she does doesn’t excuse the fact that she still didn’t say thank you for the ride. She’s treating me like I ruined her life, and all I’ve done is try to accommodate her.

I open my eyes and don’t even look at her. I reach over, turn the sink faucet off, and then grab the hand towel and begin drying my face. She’s watching me closely, waiting for me to retaliate. I take a slow step toward her, towering over her. She presses her back against the sink and keeps her eyes focused on mine as I lean forward.

Our chests are almost touching now. I can feel the heat radiating from her as her lips slowly part. She’s not pushing me away this time. In fact, it looks like she’s daring me to keep going. To come closer.