Meet Cute (Page 45)
Oh, how wrong I am. Emme won’t come out of her room for anything. Not even food. By dinnertime on Saturday I’m fed up with the standoff. I open the door to her room and find her lying in her bed, facing the wall, exactly as she was last night. I have to wonder if she’s moved at all. “You have to eat.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“I’m not leaving this room until you come downstairs and eat something.”
“Fine. Stand there all night for all I care.”
“You can be angry at me and hate me all you want, but you’re not going to starve yourself.” My voice breaks at the hate me part.
She stiffens but her shoulders deflate and she rolls over. “Fine.”
Her hair is a wild mess, and she still has streaks of black eyeliner rimming her eyes, which are puffy and red. I’m pretty sure I look almost the same, minus the eyeliner. She stomps past me and I follow her to the kitchen.
“I ordered pizza.”
“I’ll have cereal, thanks.”
She opens the fridge, pulls out the milk and a box of crappy sugary stuff, slamming it down on the table. I lean against the counter as she grabs a bowl and spoon and crosses over to the island. She doesn’t bother to sit down. Instead, she pours herself a bowl and shovels it into her mouth, barely chewing. I imagine she’s starving and this standoff is meant to torment me. Once she’s inhaled the cereal, she puts everything away, staunchly avoiding eye contact.
“We can’t fix this problem if you’re not talking to me, Emme.”
“Why should I bother? You don’t believe anything I say, anyway.”
“I need an answer that makes sense, Emme.”
“Well, I don’t have one, so I guess there’s nothing to say.” And with that she stomps back up to her room and slams her door. I’ve about had it with the damn door slamming.
Even though I’m not particularly hungry, I nab a slice of pizza and flop down on the couch. Emme’s phone is still where I left it. The screen flashes with an incoming message. She has loads of them from her friends from last night, one from that Jimmy kid and about fifteen from Clark.
After a conversation about privacy and me being responsible for her phone bills, she grudgingly gave me her password and free rein to check her messages. As I scroll, I note a message from Kailyn.
I key in the code and check the message. It was sent last night, probably around the same time I dropped Kailyn off. I was a complete asshole to her, and haven’t heard from her at all today. I assume she’s giving me space.
Usually when I go through messages Emme is here with me so it feels a lot less like I’m snooping. Guilt creeps up the back of my neck as I read through the last messages to Kailyn.
Emme: Is Dax mad at u cuz of me
Kailyn: No, honey, Dax is upset about the situation.
Emme: Cn u come over tmrw
Kailyn: I think you and Dax need to work this out.
Emme: Can I still msg u
Kailyn: You should ask Dax if that’s okay.
Emme: k Im sry I ruined 2nite
Kailyn: you didn’t ruin anything <3
Emme: almst home. Talk l8r
I read them over and over, trying to see inside them. What was I doing? What was Kailyn doing? All this time spent with Emme, and if we didn’t work out, what happened then? Once the custody issue is finally resolved, Kailyn won’t have a reason to be part of our lives. Would she stay in Emme’s life anyway? Fuck. My head is everywhere right now. And Kailyn is really the last place it should be. I should be worried about Emme getting caught with booze and where or whom she got it from, and who else Emme is protecting.
Around ten Kailyn messages asking if I’m okay.
I send one back to let her know Emme is grounded and I’ve confiscated all of her electronics, and that I need to focus my energy and attention on her.
Twenty long minutes go by before she responds. This time I get two words.
Kailyn: I understand
I’m not sure why they’re so painful when I’m the one pushing her away.
Sunday is more of the same. Emme avoids me apart from coming down once to shove a giant bowl of cereal in her face, and then disappears back into her room. At this point it’s a battle of wills.
After calling all the other parents, it’s confirmed that no one is missing a bottle of vodka—so it means someone bought it for them. The question is who?
I check the messages from her friends, hoping to get the answers Emme refuses to provide. Mostly the messages are about getting yelled at, and how no one knows where the vodka came from. Ainsley asks if Emme actually brought it “cuz grounded 4ev.”
None of her friends seem likely to encourage that kind of behavior, which leaves me with the same questions and no answer.
At four in the afternoon, Felix shows up with a six-pack. There’s some irony in that, but I’m not going to say no considering the weekend I’ve had.
“You look like a bag of shit.”
“Thanks.”
“Where’s the underage booze thief?”
I turn and smack his arm. “Shut up, asshole.”
“Sorry. Shit.” He looks around as if he’s expecting to see her. “Is she down here?”
“She’s in her room.”
“So why are you telling me to shut up?”
“Let’s go outside.”
He follows me to the back patio and passes me a beer. “You look like you need this.”
“It’s been a hell of a weekend, that’s for sure.”
“I’m surprised your girlfriend isn’t here.”
I glance over at the door on reflex, just to make sure Emme isn’t around to hear our conversation. “Kailyn isn’t my girlfriend.”
Felix lifts a brow as he tips his bottle back. “Really? Because I seem to recall you telling me you were looking forward to Friday night so you could get all up in that. Guess that plan went in the shitter, huh?”
“Yeah, well, if I hadn’t been distracted by a nice rack and a sweet ass, I might not have missed what was going on with Emme.” Even as I say it, I feel horrible; Kailyn isn’t a piece of ass I’m tapping, and she never has been.
Felix gives me a hard look. “You sure about that? I mean, if you hadn’t been with Kailyn, you would’ve been out with me passing off the wannabe groupies you can’t be bothered with.”
He has a point. But it’s more than that. “Emme’s too attached to her.”
“And that’s a bad thing? She seems pretty stable, and she spends time with Emme willingly, without you there.”
Kailyn is stable. She’s career driven, but she makes time for the people she cares about, and she’s sure as hell made time for me and Emme. Maybe more than she should. “I’m too dependent on her, to the point where I feel like I can’t do this without her. I mean, she’s been involved since the funeral, and they made her conservator. I keep going to her, like I expect her to make things okay. What happens when the custody issue is resolved and she’s not obligated to be part of this anymore? Is she gonna bail? Emme can’t handle that, and I don’t really know if I can, either. It’s a mess. I gotta get out before I get in too deep.”
“I hate to break it to you, but I think you’re already there.”
“Well, then I should cut out now. Make it just about the legal aspect. I don’t have time to juggle a relationship and Emme and work. I can barely handle Emme and work as it is.” And Kailyn has been picking up the slack for me in the Emme department when work gets in the way, which is another problem I’ll have to resolve sooner rather than later. Jesus, what the hell is even in this for her? What do I bring to the table other than a shit ton of baggage?
“Maybe you’re taking on too much. You were back to work a week after the funeral. Take some time off. It’s not like you don’t have vacation banked.”
He’s right. I have weeks of unused vacation time. “Yeah. I don’t know. I’ve been thinking about that, too. Kailyn’s mentioned a couple of times that her boss wants me on their team.”
“Do you really want to start over when you’re close to making partner, though? Who would I have to make fun of during meetings?”
I laugh a little, but it’s flat. “You could always make fun of Gene.”
“From the tax department? Too easy.” I can feel his eyes on me. “You’re seriously considering this, aren’t you?”
“Here’s the thing. No matter how close I am to partner, I can’t go that route now. Not when I need flex hours. I’d be working ninety hours a week, and I’d be in the courtroom all the time. I need flexibility, and I’ve looked into that company’s policies on family. It could work.”
“Would you take a pay cut?”
“I don’t know, but the paycheck isn’t the priority anymore. Neither is the prestige of making partner.”
“How’re you gonna manage working there with Kailyn?”
“It wasn’t like it was going on all that long. We can be professional.”
“You sure about that?”
“I’ll figure it out. I can’t keep going the way I am.” This train is going to derail eventually and I need to get off before that happens.