Mine to Hold (Mine #3)(28)
Author: Cynthia Eden

Her cheeks burned. “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—” She stopped because Claire didn’t know what to say. They were lovers, but according to Drake, it was just some sort of temporary situation. She was bumbling around, and trying to make plans and do things because—

I feel free.

Noah put down the knife he’d been holding. He headed for her. His face was so hard. So tight.

Nervousness pushed through Claire. She’d done something wrong. “Forget I said anything.” The moment was thick with tension, and she just wanted to go back to the way they’d been before.

“You really don’t know about my past, do you?”

She shook her head.

His gaze held hers. “Some women…they make plans for me.”

“Plans?”

“They learn everything they can about my life. Then they use what they know to try and win me over.”

“I’m not trying to win you.” It hurt that he thought she was just trying to manipulate him.

“No.” His lips tightened. “You tried to run from me.”

Because she’d thought it was best.

“Dinner can wait,” he said. He reached for her fingers. Threaded his with hers. “I know about your hell. Maybe it’s time you knew about mine.” And he led her out onto the balcony. Then down the wooden steps.

Her bare feet curled in the sand. The wind blew off the water, sending her t-shirt fluttering around her body. There was a chill on the wind that sent goosebumps rising along her arms.

The moon was out. Heavy and full in the sky. The big boat was docked nearby.

“I was thirteen when they died,” he said. “They were the only parents I ever knew.” He released her hand. “My real folks gave me up when I was a kid. But Mac and Kylie…they loved me so much.” A pause. “Probably the same way your parents loved you.”

She’d never thought about Noah’s family before. Why not? The guy had to be connected to others. He wasn’t just—

“My dad loved to get out on the water. He started teaching me how to steer when I was barely tall enough to reach his waist. We’d go out on that water. Stay for hours.”

“I-I loved the water, too,” Claire whispered, needing to say something. There was an echo of pain in Noah’s voice, and she wanted to soothe him. “I always felt free out on the water.” But she sure hadn’t been out on a boat like this one. She’d gone out on a little fishing boat—one with a small motor or she’d just used paddles.

“The water’s beautiful,” Noah said and his gaze turned toward the waves. “And it’s dangerous.”

The waves crashed into the beach.

“Sometimes it reminds me of you.”

He thought she was dangerous? Claire shook her head, then realized he couldn’t see the movement. “I’m not dangerous to you.” She’d never hurt him. He’d been one of the few people to actually help her. To care.

“You’re more dangerous than you know.” The wind took that soft reply, twisted it, and Claire wasn’t sure he’d even said those words.

Then he turned his back on the water and faced her. “A storm came up. One of those freak storms that shouldn’t have happened. It sent our boat rolling. We lost the sail—hell, we lost everything.”

Goosebumps rose on her arms. “Noah…” Claire didn’t want to hear the end of this story. She wanted to picture him happy. She wanted him to introduce her to Mac and Kylie.

“I wasn’t strong enough. I couldn’t keep my dad afloat. He’d gotten hit in the head with the mast, and he was bleeding. I couldn’t keep him afloat.”

She wrapped her arms around him. “I don’t want to go out on the water,” Claire whispered. You don’t have to tell me anymore. Stop, Noah, just stop. Because it hurt him to share this story. She could feel the pain vibrating through him.

“I couldn’t save my mother, either. I tried. So damn hard. I treaded water with her for hours, but when the Coast Guard finally found us…” He wasn’t holding her back. Just standing stiffly in her embrace. “She was dead.”

In his arms.

Claire squeezed her eyes shut, but the image was there, burning brightly in her mind.

Sometimes, she forgot—I’m not the only one who has lost. Her own pain was so thick. It had blinded her. I should’ve seen his pain sooner. Noah had been so busy helping her, but she’d done nothing for him.

“I don’t take anyone else out on the water with me because I never want to be in that situation again.”

Holding someone he loved and watching that person slip away?

“I get sea sick,” she lied, talking quickly and still holding him tightly. “I hate being out on the water.”

He pushed her back. Stared down at her.

“Let’s go back inside,” she said. Her voice was husky with tears that she wanted to shed, for him.

“The water reminds me of them,” he told her. “I hate it, and I love it.” He shook his head. “I’ll never let it take anyone else from me again.”

Was that why he had this place here? A place that was both haven and hell? A place he’d brought her to? “How many…” She cleared her throat. “How many other women have been here?”

“Just you, Claire. Just you.”

Drake’s words whispered through her mind. He doesn’t keep them, you know…He sleeps with them, gets the lust out of his system, then he lets them go. He doesn’t like to have the same lover twice in a row.

“Why me?” Claire asked him.

“Fuck if I know.”

She blinked. Well, that wasn’t exactly some romantic confession. She started to ease back from him.

But then he was holding tight to her. “I just know that I need you close. Sometimes, I think if I can’t see you, if I can’t touch you—” He broke off, and his head jerked to the left.

His body tensed as he stared into the darkness.

Jeez, but she didn’t want the guy to stop talking. “Noah? What were you saying?” Keep saying it.

“We’re not alone.” Then he pushed her back and ran toward the sand dunes.

Shocked, Claire stared after him for a few seconds before understanding kicked in—it sure kicked in hard when she saw the dark shadow rise from the sand dunes and start running away.

Only Noah wasn’t letting that shadow get far.