Raw(70)
Author: Belle Aurora

When I was eight, I had her. For one night. Fate is a cruel ass bitch, and that night changed everything for me.

I can make excuses.

I could say I was just a damaged kid that grew up to be a broken man.

I could.

But I won’t.

I don’t like labels. I won’t be defined by words like normal, unbalanced, or damaged. There’s so much more to me than words. I have layers, just like the next person, and if you picked me apart layer-by-layer, you’d find a blackened crust where my heart should be. But ever since Lexi came into my life, a thin bud of greenery sprouted there, giving me hope that even I could be the person who makes someone’s day better.

It’s growing every day. And I’ll be damned if anyone tries to take her away from me. I’d kill anyone who tried.

Running a hand through my hair, I swallow hard as my gut sinks.

A decision has to be made. No one would dare take her from me, so why am I risking losing her by telling her the truth?

I know what I did was unforgivable. I could tell her. I know what the result would be, though. My girl would walk out on me in a second flat.

The sinking feeling grows.

There’s a lot that needs to be said. And Nox was right…the noose around my neck is tightening. I can hardly breathe.

“You okay, boss?” The concerned voice coming from the doorway snags my attention.

The kid. “I’m good.” Smirking, I ask, “Are you? You ask your girl out yet or what?”

He half-glares at me. “I would’ve if I didn’t think I’d have been late for work.”

There are just some things that can’t wait. I know this now.

Picking up my cell, I type out a text, press send, and wait. Michael looks more and more nervous by the second, and I smile. I like knowing he still fears me when he shouldn’t. It’s funny.

Happy appears at the office door behind Michael. “’Sup?”

Crossing my arms behind my head, I lean back in my throne and direct them both. “You’re gonna take the kid along with you today. First, he’s got a stop to make, though. Then you can both go about business as per usual.”

Happy’s eyes narrow on me. “No can do. I got…” His eye’s bore into mine. “…shit to do.”

Dammit. I forgot. He’s accompanying some runs today for some bigger drops that need to remain secure. My face falls. I don’t have time to take him myself. I’ve got an appointment in an hour.

I sigh. “Forget about it.” But then I see Mickey’s face. It falls faster than London Bridge. Fuck.

Happy raises a brow at me. I know he’d take him along, he just needs my say so. Lexi would be pissed.

That is, if she found out.

If. If is good.

A grin tugs at my lips. “Go on. Mickey, go ask your girl out, then you’ll be on the road with Happy most of the day.”

The kid’s face turns from stunned disbelief, to shock, to beaming, all in a matter of seconds.

“Seriously?”

Not wanting to see the mush coming off of him, I turn to my laptop, dismissing them both. “Go on. Get.”

Typing away, I pretend not to notice Mickey still standing in the doorway of my office.

“Thank you.” He says this so softly that I barely make it out. “For everything.”

My chest aches.

I respond with equal softness. “You’re welcome.” He gently closes the door behind him.

I whisper into the empty room, “You’re welcome, brother.”

Happy

Grinning like an idiot, I watch Michael run down the steps of the apartment building. His eyes wide, he looks like he’s about to faint.

My heart skips a beat. My smile fades.

He pauses mid-run and walks over to the car almost in slow motion.

Fuck. The kid looks like his heart is breaking.

Dammit.

When he finally reaches the car, he opens the door and sits, staring into the dashboard of the car, his eyes blank.

Reaching over, I clutch his shoulder and ask gently on a squeeze, “What happened, buddy?”

His mouth opens, but nothing comes out. He shrugs. A moment later, he whispers, “She said yes.”

I smile. “She did?”

Still looking confused beyond belief, he nods.

Pushing at his shoulder, I laugh, “Isn’t this what you wanted, kid?”

“Yeah. I mean, of course.” He pauses. “I just don’t get why she’d want me.”

Oh, man. This is getting too deep for me.

I offer him the best comparison I can think of. “You seen Lexi?”

His brow knits as he nods.

“You seen Twitch?”

Brows still bunched, he nods. He nods some more. A small smile tugs at his lips, and I know he gets me. I tell him, “Opposites, bud. Opposites attract.”

Starting the car, I pull out my cell and text Twitch.

Me: The kid got his girl.

Not ten seconds passes when my phone chimes.

Twitch: Good. Now get back to work.

Turning to Michael, I ask, “You ready to see the real side of Falcon Plastics, boy?”

His eyes widen and he whispers, “Fuck yeah.”

I chuckle.

The kid is doing just fine.

Going through the rest of the budget from Falcon Plastics is stressing me out.

Who am I to decide which charities and organizations need it more than others?

Charlie stopped by half an hour ago to find me all but hyperventilating. He asked what the problem was. That was about the time Alexa the Freak-Out Chick pushed her way out of my brain by means of my mouth. “There’s not a lot of money left, Charlie, and I thought this would be easy, you know? Giving money out to people who need it like Robin Hood. Which makes you a member of my merry men. And that’s fine, because you’re like this huge Islander teddy bear, so people would be scared of you and have no idea that you’re a sweetheart, but as a member of my merry men, I have to ask you to take this burden away from me. Because it’s a lot of burden. And I’m only human, Charlie.” I looked up into his eyes in pleading. “I don’t like being Robin Hood. Please don’t make me wear tights.”

And pause for air.

Charlie smiled and stepped closer to me. Once he reached the edge of my desk, he said, “You know what I like about you, Lex?” I shook my head, still in a panic. He went on, “You’ve got heart. And I knew you’d be like this. I’m surprised this didn’t come sooner. But that’s also why I knew you’d be perfect to take care of the budget.” I wasn’t following. And from Charlie’s chuckle, he knew it too. “I know that whoever ends up on your budget will deserve it. I know that every last cent of that money will be given to a range of organizations. The money will be distributed equally and without discrimination.” My heart warmed and he smiled. “That’s why I chose you.”