Reject Me (Kin #5)(26)
Author: Jennifer Foor

Chapter 14

Jamey

I’d like to say that it got easier as the days went by, but it wouldn’t have been the truth. The more time that passed only made me wish I could go back and do things differently. I never realized how much Peyton meant to me until she was gone from my life. What was the most surprising was that it wasn’t the sex that I was missing so much. It was her smile, and the way she looked at me like nobody else in the world existed. She took care of me in a sense, nurtured me to push me to be a better person. I felt lost, completely out of my realm.

After spending the night at my brother’s house that first night I knew I couldn’t sleep in my bed and not think about her, so I agreed to go ahead and take over the lease to his place. I also took on more hours at the diner to stay busy and make extra money to be able to afford a place on my own.

After two weeks of being miserable I helped my brother move into his new house. Since Lacey wanted new furniture, they left me almost everything. It was nice not having to move twice in one week.

I don’t really understand why, but I started hanging out with my brother more. It was as if me being let down had opened up a door for us. We didn’t bicker, and he was constantly inviting me to things that he’d never done before. It was also nice to hang out with my cousin Ford. Since Lacey and Sky were best friends they were together all of the time. The house they purchased needed work, so every night they’d meet over there and help out.

It wasn’t until a couple weeks after the whole ordeal with Peyton that I started to feel like the fifth wheel. Joey and Ford had women that loved them, while I usually sat in a chair away from them watching how happy they all were.

I was jealous.

It really made me realize all that I’d been denying myself, and I knew that my brother had been right before. Once he met Lacey everything about his life had changed. She made him see that being alone wasn’t all that it was cracked up to be, not when something so amazing could be waiting at home for him every night.

I got that now.

I understood what it was that he was talking about, and it hurt a little more that I’d had the chance to have it and somehow let it slip away from me.

On a Monday when we weren’t too busy my mother pulled me aside to have a chat. After the last argument about Peyton I wasn’t really sure of her motive.

“Jamey, I want you to be honest with me when I ask you this, because to be perfect blunt, I’m worried about you. Are you okay?”

I shot her a sarcastic grin, like she was way off base. “Yeah. I’m fine.”

“Do you really believe that you can bullshit a bullshitter?”

I shrugged and looked down at the table. Grabbing the salt shaker to avoid eye contact with my mom. “Fine. I’m not okay. Are you happy now?”

“No.” She crossed her arms and waited for me to look at her. When my mother spoke she required eye contact, and she’d stand there silent until she got it. “Is it because you moved out? I knew it was a bad idea.”

“It’s not that.”

“Then what, Jamey? You’ve been moping around for weeks now. Hell, even some of the customers have noticed.”

As scared as I was to mention her name, I knew I had to come clean with my mother. She had the ability to cut me off from a job if she wanted to, and from the way she was talking it seemed as if she was more concerned about my performance at the diner. I was getting that vibe from her. Sometimes she was extremely hard for me to read, or maybe I just sucked at understanding women period.

“I’m havin’ girl problems. Before you say somethin’ you need to know that I’m not foolin’ around anymore. This shit is for real.”

“I figured as much, since I haven’t seen her around.”

“You can say her name, mom. I know you hate her, but you don’t have to pretend that you haven’t known her since she was born.”

“I don’t hate Peyton, son. I hate what she does to you.”

“That’s where you’re wrong. All she ever wanted was to be with me. Everything that happened between us was on me. I didn’t understand the hype about bein’ with one person.”

“Jamey, part of my problem with Peyton was the fact that our families are so close. I knew that by you two dating each other it would only cause problems. So what happened? Did she finally wise up?”

“It didn’t exactly happen that way. You remember that chick Angie from Jersey?”

“She’s hard to forget with that accent. Why?”

“She told Peyton that we were together when we weren’t. She ruined everything we had goin’, and I don’t get why she did it. Peyton didn’t deserve that shit. Now she refuses to speak to me. In fact she told me that she never wants to see my face again. The hardest part about it was that I finally realized what I wanted. I made a promise to her for us to be together, and it’s all over now.” I sat down the salt shaker and leaned back in my seat, running my hand through my hair as I waited for my mom to reply.

“Sometimes it takes something drastic for people to see how important things are in their life. Your brother had to leave the country to see it. I don’t know how I raised such hard-headed boys. I thought I’d taught you to respect yourselves, and the women that you got involved with. A part of that blame should fall on me.” She leaned forward so that she could talk in a lower tone. “I don’t like seeing you hurting the way you are, but if Peyton can’t see the truth you need to move on. You can’t live in limbo while she’s out running around. It’s not healthy.”

“Mom, I respect your advice, but you’re wrong again.”

She raised her brow, silently demanding a further explanation.

“I don’t care how long it will take, or what I have to do to prove it. I’m goin’ to get her back.”

“You’re in love with her. I get that.”

That word was getting easier to hear. “It’s more than that. I know we’re young, and maybe too naïve to understand what it takes to be in a relationship, but I need to at least try. If you taught me anything it’s to never give up. I’m not goin’ to leave the country like Joey. I’m stayin’ and I’m fightin’ for what I want, even if I have to go through Shayne.”

“I’m not the best at giving advice considering my track record. I met your daddy when I was just eighteen, and when he moved us over here I never thought I could be happy. After I got the diner I ignored his needs, focusing all my energy on making this business work. Even though I learned my lesson when he left us, I wasn’t that upset about it. I’d worked too hard to make a name for myself. It’s hard for me to see you and your brother struggling with relationships, especially when I’ve never felt the way that you feel. Sure, I loved your daddy, but it wasn’t that forever kind of love. Some people just never find that.”