Safe with Me

I close my eyes as I sigh and lean my forehead against his chest. “Thank God.”

“He’s still been fired. Even if he doesn’t have a record, he was inappropriate with you. Isaac fired him before I showed up there and ripped his balls off.”

I laugh and lift my head to gaze up into his eyes. “I handled him.”

“I really think we’re safer here, Legs.”

My smile evaporates. “No.”

He growls and pulls me against him more tightly, buries his face in my neck and takes a long, hard breath in. “You are so fucking stubborn,” he murmurs against me, the words muffled, and I can’t help but laugh at him.

“Back at you.”

“If we are going back to your house tomorrow, I have some conditions.”

“Wow, this sounds like a compromise,” I reply dryly. He bites my neck, right where it meets my shoulder, before he pulls back and glares down at me.

“One, no school bus. Either Matt or myself will take them to and from school every day. I will not budge on this.” He runs his hands soothingly up and down my back, but narrows his eyes at me, daring me to defy him.

“Yes, si-…” I catch myself and stutter, “Okay.”

Caleb smiles down at me softly. “You can say ‘yes, sir’, you know. I hear it every day.”

“Not in this lifetime,” I mutter and chuckle. “No way.”

“Okay, number two, we have the alarm system on the house expanded.”

“I can’t afford…”

“I know people, Brynna. This won’t cost you a dime, and should have been done weeks ago. I want censors on the windows and motion censor lights outside.” He stops and stares at me, waiting for me to acknowledge him, and I do with a nod.

“Number three, I want you to go to the range with me more often, and I’m leaving my nine mil with you at all times.”

I begin shaking my head, but he leans in and rests his forehead against mine and rubs our noses together. “Please,” he whispers, his voice rough, and I know it’s taking everything in him to agree to letting us go home. He wants us all to be safe. How can I find fault in that?

“Okay,” I acquiesce, and kiss his chin. “Anything else?”

“Yes, neither you nor the girls are ever to be alone. Ever.”

“Can we go to the bathroom alone?” I ask sarcastically.

“You are such a smart ass,” he responds, but his lips are pulled back into a half-smile and his eyes are happy.

“I can live with this,” I murmur and kiss his lips softly.

“Good.”

“I’m sleepy.” I yawn widely and then chuckle. “I think I’ll head to bed.”

“I’ll be along soon.” He kisses the tip of my nose before I move away from him toward the bedroom. “I have to call Matt and then I have a bit of reading to do.”

“Okay.” I grin and saunter into his bedroom, yawning once again.

***

“Holy fuck! Get down, get down! Retreat!”

Rat tat tat tat tat. Boom! Boom!

I jolt up in the bed and search frantically around, but Caleb isn’t in the bedroom.

“Take cover, Goddamn it!”

I jump from the bed and run into the living room. The lights are still on, as is the television, turned to a military show on the History channel. Caleb is laying across the couch, where he must have fallen asleep while watching the show, but he’s thrashing about, sweating and his breath is coming in hard, harsh pants.

I rush to his side and sink to my knees beside him.

What do I do? Do I touch him?

The television continues behind me. Boom! Rat tat tat tat tat!

I grab for the remote and snap the power off and then turn back to the terrorized man before me.

“Caleb,” I murmur and gently lay my hand on his bicep, and before I know it he’s rolled us both onto the floor, he’s pinning me with his huge body and wrapped his hand around my throat, squeezing.

He’s having one helluva nightmare.

And so am I.

“I said retreat, goddamn it!” He shouts and glares down at me, his eyes glazed and blank, as though he’s not really there at all. It’s the most terrifying thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

Holy fucking shit.

“Mommy! Mommy!” I hear the girls in the doorway, scared shitless and crying.

Dear God, don’t let him choke me to death in front of my girls.

“I’ve got you, motherfucker!” Caleb growls in my ear, and a cold sweat breaks out all over my body. Jesus, if I were an insurgent, I would just lie down and die at the sound of this voice.

He wouldn’t have to shoot me.

“Caleb,” I try again, but he squeezes even harder. I wiggle my arms free and begin hitting him on the back and sides, over and over, trying to wake him but he just pins me harder with his legs and snarls down at me. The bright color of his eagle tattoo catches my eye and I watch his shoulder muscle flex as he tightens his grip on my throat.

“Stop hurting my mommy!” Josie cries just as the edges of my vision begin to darken and I see stars.

Just as Maddie lets out an ear-piercing scream, I knee the inside of his thigh, hard, and am suddenly freed and pushed away from him, rolled onto my stomach, gasping and wheezing.

I cover my throat with my hands and cough, pull myself up onto my knees and watch Caleb’s eyes clear, the blankness replaced with horror and disgust. He scrambles away from me, in a backwards crab-crawl, until his back hits the wall.

The girls are huddled together in the doorway, clinging to each other with wide eyes, crying for me.

“Fuck me,” Caleb whispers, and my head whips around to find his knees pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around them, and his face in his hands. He’s shaking violently.

“Caleb,” I manage, my voice hoarse, but he cringes back away from my touch and shakes his head adamantly no.

I jump from the floor and run to my babies, pull them into my arms and carry them back into their bedroom, to the full sized bed they’ve been sharing.

“Why was Caleb hurting you?” Josie sniffles and buries her face against my chest as Maddie clings to me and buries her face in my neck.

“He didn’t mean to,” I reassure them, repeating it over and over again, while reassuring myself. I kiss their heads and breathe in their sweet baby shampoo smells, rocking them back and forth. “He was having a bad nightmare.”

“He sounded scared,” Maddie murmurs and sniffles.

“I think he’s still scared,” I whisper and kiss her forehead.