Shame (Ruin #3)(8)
Author: Rachel Van Dyken

“Good,” he huffed.

“I was kidding.”

Saylor patted Gabe’s shoulder. “Gotta let the baby birds out of the nest someday, Gabe.”

“No, that’s actually not true, and this is why—”

I leaned forward and banged my head against the coffee table a few times. “Okay, guys, as much as I love all this fun banter and exhausting dialogue, I really need to go finish this assignment, so you two—” I pointed at Gabe and Saylor. “—kiss away. And you guys—” I pointed at Wes and Kiersten. “—go solve world hunger or something.”

Wes tapped his chin . “Done.”

“Wise ass.” I grinned. “Now, you guys go be all mushy and hot elsewhere. I’m going to finish this assignment if it kills me, and then I’m going to go take a nice long walk.”

“And think about your hot professor?” Kiersten asked.

“Bye, guys. See you at the benefit.”

“Dress nice!” Gabe called as I walked off.

“Wear pants!” I called back as I pushed open the door to Starbucks and rammed smack-dab into heat.

My bag fell onto the ground with a thump. “I’m so sorry.” I bent to pick it up and noticed the shoes.

Brown shoes.

Ones that belonged to feet. Feet that I recognized from before. My gaze slid up the dark jeans and settled on a trim waist, finally landing on the same scowl I’d seen a few hours back.

“Maybe if you weren’t so late all the time, you wouldn’t be in such a hurry?” Professor Blake’s eyebrows shot up as he offered me his hand.

Left with no choice but to take it, I grasped his fingers, gasping as the contact singed me from head to toe. Hot professor was a serious, serious understatement. Swear, his gray eyes saw through my clothes.

His breathing changed just briefly before the mask went back on. He nodded to the papers clenched tightly in my hand. “Working on your assignment?”

“Yup.” I rocked back on my heels. “Caffeine’s my drug of choice and all that.”

He smiled.

Not a mocking smile, but a real smile, one that I felt all over my body like someone had just attached me to a freaking tanning bed and turned it on high. I took a step back, nearly colliding with another body leaving Starbucks.

“Whoa! Class meeting!” The male voice said from behind me. “Hey, do I get an A if I spot the professor out of class? You know like seeing a bear in the wild?”

Professor Blake’s eyes darkened as he turned slightly away from me. “No, Mr. McHale.”

“Damn.” He crossed his arms and laughed.

“Assignment’s due at midnight,” Professor Blake said in clipped tones then sidestepped both of us and walked into the coffee shop.

I exhaled in relief and started walking toward my dorm.

“Hey, wait up!” Jack called from behind me. “You finished yet?”

“No.” I wanted to kick every pinecone I saw but refrained, just barely. “I have a few more to write down.”

“Me too.” He smiled warmly. “Let’s do it together.” He blushed and then shook his head. “I mean the assignment.”

“I knew what you meant.” I laughed. “I’m a girl. We don’t think on that same… level.”

Jack eyed me up and down. “More’s the pity.”

“You gonna try to flirt or work?”

“Can I do both?”

“No.”

“Fine.” He slugged his backpack over his left shoulder. “Let’s go watch people.”

I fell into step beside him, and when the coast was clear, when he was jabbering on about homework, I looked over my shoulder to see Professor Blake watching me from the window at Starbucks.

“Hey, you coming or not?” Jack asked. His smile was easy, nonthreatening.

I couldn’t figure him out; then again, I didn’t have to overanalyze everything.

“Yeah.” I quickly turned back around. “Yeah, I’m coming.”

CHAPTER SIX

It was almost too easy, bending her to my will, allowing her to think she was important. I wanted to see how far I could push her, so I broke up with her. I’ve never seen a girl cry so much in my entire life. Hell, she had to have medically dehydrated herself. When she was done wailing, I nodded toward the door and crossed my arms. She stomped out and slammed the door behind her.

Minutes later, she came flying back in and wrapped her body around mine, kissing me forcefully across the mouth. “I can’t live without you,” she whispered.

And I laughed, because I had a dirty little secret. She was going to have to, and I’d laugh — from hell. I’d get the final laugh. “I know, baby, I’m so sorry.” I kissed her back, satisfied that the game was still on, that she was still clueless to who I really was, what I really was, and what she meant to me. Absolutely nothing. —The Journal of Taylor B.

Tristan

WARMTH FROM THE coffee mug seeped into my palm. I stared down at the steaming dark sludge. Bitter. The coffee was bitter. Or maybe it was just my life? Possibly me? Nothing gave me any sense of satisfaction — coffee, food, sex. Ha, now that was a good one. Sex. Did I even know how to perform anymore? Not likely. After all, I’d been the good guy, the golden boy, the one who didn’t do things like get girls pregnant or steal their virginity on prom night. My name wasn’t Taylor.

It was easy to see why she’d become a sort of addiction to him; she’d be that way to any guy with working eyes. Getting her legs out of my head had taken a lot more thought than I’d originally intended.

I gripped the cup in one hand and pulled out my iPad with the other. I still had some work to finish but hated the feeling of being alone in the classroom. I needed noise, a distraction. Odd, how a constant hum of voices soothed me. Funny, it hadn’t really soothed him — it had led to his destruction.

Class, not voices.

“Tristan?” A voice interrupted my dark thoughts.

I lifted my head and damn-near ran for the door. “Wes.” My voice croaked. “It’s been… a while.” Try years. Lots and lots of years. I tried to look busy shuffling papers, but Wes was one of the guys — way too nice, way too available. He plopped down across from me and leaned forward, his eyebrows arching in interest.

“Let me guess. You’re the new hot professor.”

I almost spit out my coffee then tossed my pen onto the stack of papers I’d just shuffled, which hadn’t needed shuffling. “I’m sorry, what?”