Some like It Wild (The Wild Ones #2)(45)
Author: M. Leighton

“What’re you doing here? Finally get up enough balls to come home?” I ask, pushing against her shoulder with my own.

“Something like that,” she answers vaguely. “How’re things going with the estate?”

“The inventory is complete. I guess now we just wait on the hearing.”

Jenna nods. “God, I hope she doesn’t get this place. It would kill Daddy.”

“She won’t get it, Jenna. I told you I’d take care of it. Stop worrying.”

I’ve already decided that I’d use every dime of my savings to pay off our aunt if need be. She’s a money whore. I think that would be like speaking her language. But if that didn’t work, my next step would be to threaten her, which I’m not above doing if it means saving this place from her. But Jenna doesn’t need to know the details. She just needs to know it’s taken care of. And it will be. One way or the other.

She’s quiet for a few minutes before she changes the subject. “So what are you still doing here? I figured you’d get Einie and be gone the instant the lawyer’s people left.”

I shrug. I don’t know how to answer that. “I’m not sure what my next move is just yet.”

“What do you mean? You go back to your life. You live it just like you planned. What’s not to know?”

I shrug again. “Maybe it’s time for something different.”

“Such as . . .”

I shrug yet again. “I don’t know. Where I was just doesn’t hold a lot of appeal for me right now.”

“So move. Find another job in another town. Some place where there’s skydiving. And lots of girls. That’s all you seem to need.” I look at Jenna. She’s grinning.

I smile back. “Yeah, I’m pretty easy to figure out, huh?”

“Hell yeah! As long as there’s a fire to fight, a few skirts to chase, and something to jump off of, you’re a happy camper.” I say nothing, so she nudges my shoulder. “Right?” I shrug. Yet again. “I swear to God, I’m gonna slap the shit out of you if you shrug one more time. What is wrong with you?”

“Did you drive all the way down here just to harass me?” I snap.

“No. I drove all the way down here to see my brother. I’m afraid that after you leave here, I won’t ever see you again.”

Surprised, I frown down into her face. “Why would you think that?”

I see her chin tremble. This isn’t like Jenna at all.

“You’ve never been really . . . into family. And now with both Mom and Dad gone, and this place up in the air, I’m just afraid you’ll travel off to parts unknown and I’ll never see you again.” Jenna turns her dark eyes up to mine. They’re so much like I remember Mom’s being, especially now, glistening with tears. And a lot of love. “Jake, you’re all I have left. Absentee grandparents don’t count.”

I wrap my arm around Jenna’s shoulders and pull her in for a hug. “You’re all I’ve got, too. And I promise you’ll see me again. Hell, who knows. I might even end up here. Stranger things have happened.”

Jenna leans back to look at me. “What? Why the hell would you wanna do that?”

I shrug, and she slaps my arm. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m just getting older, thinking about all the stuff I’ve missed out on all these years. Maybe it’s time to finally settle down. At least a little bit. I mean, it’s not like I can’t travel wherever I want to. You know, to jump off things.” I grin at her, and she grins back.

“As much as I’d never want to live here, it would make me really happy if you did. I won’t lie.”

“I’m not saying that’s gonna happen. I’m just telling you that, right now, I’m not sure where I’ll end up. But I promise to keep you in the loop, ’kay?”

“’Kay.”

Over the last couple of weeks, since that night at Lucky’s, I haven’t looked too deeply into my reasons for suddenly wanting to stick around Greenfield. I know one thing’s for sure: It can’t have anything to do with Laney. I mean, she’s got a life in another town, and for all I know could be marrying someone else. There would be no reason for me to stay here for her. But still, there’s something in me that’s just not ready to move on yet. A gut instinct. And, for a guy, I’m fairly intuitive, so I listen to my gut. And my gut’s telling me to stay. At least for a while.

TWENTY-SEVEN: Laney

Summerton. It was always the perfect place for me. It was far enough away from my parents, but not too far. It was bigger than Greenfield, but not too big. It had stuff to do, but was still a good place to raise a family. It had more job opportunities for me and for Shane, yet it wasn’t so big we could never move up in the world.

What a difference a few short months makes!

I unlock the door to the apartment I’ve barely stayed in. I rented it shortly after getting my first job. I signed the lease for one year thinking that I would only need it for a short time. I figured Shane and I would be getting married within that year and then moving into our first home together.

Now, I look around the cute space—the bright eggshell walls, the cheerful yellow curtains, the comfy ecru couch with its yellow and white throw pillows—and I feel nothing but disappointment. With . . . everything. Nothing turned out like I thought it would. Not that I’d really want that version of my life now.

It didn’t take me long to realize I didn’t love Shane. Not really. He seemed like everything I wanted. He fit the description to a T. The problem was that, until recently, I didn’t know who I was, much less how to go about finding what would make me happy. I’d still love a husband and a family and a home to take care of, but all that has shifted to encompass so much more. Laughter, excitement, passion. True love.

But it’s looking like I’ll never have any of that. At least not the vivacious version that I felt for a few short weeks. I might be able to find some watered-down version of it with a man that will . . . do. But what girl ever dreams about going through an entire lifetime with a person she settled for?

Not me.

For the thousandth time, I hold back tears. I’ve mourned Jake enough for three or four lifetimes. I need to move on.

The problem is, I don’t know how.

There was no real ending. No closure. We just . . . stopped.

Would I rather have spilled my guts and had to watch Jake awkwardly try not to further crush me? No. But in a way, that would’ve been preferable. At least it would feel over. Final. Not like it does now. Every day, I wake up like I’m in limbo. I go through the motions of living, but I’m not alive at all. Not really. It’s like I’m stuck back in those weeks with Jake, the weeks when life held so much promise.