Souls Unfractured

My head snapped to the kid. “Why the fuck would you wanna be like me?”

Asher pointed at me. “You’re huge, strong, can protect yourself.”

“I lift a lotta fucking weights,” I replied.

Asher shook his head. “I saw what you did to our poppa. I know what you did to Pastor Hughes and Elder Paul.” Asher threw a handful grass to the ground, and said, “I used to dream of being able to do that to Poppa, what you did. After my mama died, when he beat on me with a bat in that cellar, I wanted to hurt him back. Because he took my mama from me. My mama, Flame. She was such a good woman. But too weak to cope with him.” Asher sniffed, and quickly used his forearm to wipe his face.

My head twitched, not knowing what the fuck to do. But Asher pulled his shit together, and choked out, “Then the older brother I always prayed would come back and get me, did. And you killed that fucker. You killed him so that he couldn’t hurt anyone ever again.” Asher started pulling the grass again, and said, “That’s why I wanna be like you. I don’t want to be hurt by anyone again. I wanna be able to defend myself, like you. I wanna be able to protect myself, from people like him.”

I looked at Asher’s size and knew that when he was my age he’d be a big motherfucker too, but all I said in response was a promise. “No one will fucking touch you again. You got me, and a fuck load of Hangmen, at your back. And no one fucks with us. No one.”

Asher was silent, then as his head dropped forward, his breathing changed. I turned, panicking at what the fuck was wrong, when I saw water in his eyes. I ran my hands down my face when he said, “Thank you.”

I blew out a breath, and sitting forward, elbows on knees, I put my head in my hands, feeling like the worst brother on the damn planet. “Asher, I can’t be touched. Fuck, I can’t… I can’t—”

“I know,” he interrupted, as he wiped his cheeks dry.

“You do?” I rasped, fucking hating myself for being so fucked in the head.

“Yeah, AK explained. Flame, he told me everything about you. I kept asking about you, so he sat me down and told me. I just want to know you more. And you never really came out of your cabin, or even talked to me.” He paused, then added, “But I know you can’t be touched. AK was real clear about that.”

“Right,” was all I could say in response.

Asher looked behind him, and then back to me. “But Maddie can touch you.” I froze. Holding my breath I nodded my head. “It's all good,” he quickly replied. Turning a deep shade of red, he said, “She’s real pretty. And… and I’m glad she can touch you. I’m glad you have her.”

Maddie’s face flashed into my head, and I stated, “She’s fucking beautiful. She’s everything to me.”

“Yeah,” Asher said, then his face flushed redder still. “And Flame? Will you call me Little Ash? It’s what I’ve been getting called by all the brothers. Viking said it was my road name… and… and I like it. It feels new, different, like I’m someone else. Just, Asher reminds me of—”

“I get it,” I said, cutting him off, knowing I hated the fucking name Josiah just as much, if not more, as he hated Asher.

“Thanks,” Little Ash replied, and we returned to our silence. Just as I was about to get up, not knowing what the fuck else to say, Little Ash said, “I really like all the bikes round here.”

I sat back down to the grass, and said, “I’m good with bikes. Harley’s and Choppers especially.”

Little Ash smiled up at me and said, “AK told me you can build them from scratch.”

“Yeah.”

Little Ash dipped his head, then lifted his head, a new expression on his face. “Would you build me one, Flame? Vike said he’d teach me how to ride, but that I needed a bike. He said to talk to you about it.”

“Yeah, I could build you one,” I said.

“A black and chrome Fat Boy? Like yours, with Flames on the side? AK showed me how to use the net. I’ve been reading all about them and how they’re built. I wanted to understand how you built them in your work shop. Then AK told me you could customize the paintwork as well. He told me you’d done your Harley.” He turned his head away and said, “I went and had a look one night when I couldn’t sleep. And I loved it. I loved the flames and skulls on the side. It looks amazing, Flame. So if I could, I’d like one just like it. Just like yours.”

A warm feeling spread within my chest, and I said roughly, “Whatever you want.”