The Goddess Test (Goddess Test #1)(47)
Author: Aimee Carter

Ava was silent. I ran my fingers through her wheat-colored hair, still damp from washing out the blood. “Did they hurt you at all? Do you need to see a doctor?”

“No,” she mumbled. “I’m fine.”

It was clear that she was anything but, but the pain of losing Xander didn’t negate the possibility that she had something more to do with it. “What happened?”

She hesitated, and for a second, I didn’t expect her to say anything. When she did, she spoke so softly that I had to strain to hear her, even though the room was silent. “I don’t know. I just—woke up, and Theo was there, staring at me and Xander like—I don’t know.”

I bit my lip. “Was Theo the one to attack Xander, or did Xander attack Theo?”

“I don’t know. I woke up, saw a sword, screamed and ran into the corner. I wasn’t looking. I just—” She rolled over onto her back and stared up at me, her eyes red and full of tears. “There was blood and I was screaming and they were swearing and I don’t know what happened, all right?”

I nodded. My fists were clenched, and my nails dug painfully into my palms. “Is there anything else you can tell me? Anything else you saw or heard or—”

“No.” She rolled away from me. “It doesn’t matter anyway, does it?”

I wasn’t sure what happened, but something inside of me must’ve snapped. I’d spent months—years trying to stop the people I cared about from dying, and Ava couldn’t muster up enough compassion about someone she claimed to love to figure out what had happened.

I stood quickly, and suddenly the room seemed much smaller than before. “Don’t you get it, Ava? Xander is dead. Really, truly, never coming back here dead. And right now, everything points to Theo murdering him because he caught you in bed with him.”

That got her attention. Twisting around, she stared at me, her mouth open.

“Here’s how it goes,” I said heatedly. “Either Theo is innocent and Xander was the one who attacked him, or Theo is guilty and Xander was defending himself. Do you even care, or are you just upset because you lost a toy?”

Seething, I began to pace up and down the room. I couldn’t remember ever being this angry in my life.

“I get it, you’re dead, your life is over and you’re having fun while you can. But this isn’t fun anymore, not for anyone but you—you’re playing with these guys like they’re only here to entertain you. You act like no one else matters except in relation to you getting what you want, and now Xander is dead because of you.”

“You’re blaming me?” she said. “But I didn’t kill him—”

“You didn’t hack him into little pieces, but you’re the reason it happened.” I stopped in front of the bed, running my fingers through my hair. “Ella wants you gone. Frankly, if all you’re going to do is waste your time sleeping with every guy in the manor and acting like the world revolves around you, then so do I. You’re useless here. The only things you’ve done are bicker with Ella and get Xander killed.”

The moment I said it, I regretted it, but I couldn’t take it back. It was the truth, or at least an exaggeration of it. But when I looked at Ava, I saw a scared girl who was my friend, not the heinous, selfish whore I’d painted her as. My stomach twisted, and guilt flooded through me so fast that I felt like I was choking.

“Henry let you stay here because we’re friends,” I managed to say, and while I was calmer, my voice held the chill of accusation. “And we are, Ava, or at least I thought we were. But he risked that for me, and all you’ve done is get one of his men killed and the other branded a murderer. Do you have any idea how awful that makes me feel?”

Ava stared at me, her lower lip trembling. “You’re just jealous,” she whispered. “You’re stuck with Henry your whole life while I get to be with anyone I want. Admit it—the only reason you’re acting like this is because I get a choice and you don’t.”

I glowered at her, trying to ignore the way her words echoed through my mind. Hadn’t I been thinking the same thing a few months before? But I wasn’t going to give Ava the satisfaction of thinking she was right. She wasn’t, not anymore. “Don’t try to turn this back on me,” I said. “I had a choice, and I made it. More important, I’m happy with my decision, and I’m doing everything I possibly can to live up to it. I’m not jealous of you, Ava. I’m ashamed.”

The hurt in her eyes was painful to see, but I forced myself to continue. She had to understand there were limits, and until she stopped hurting others, I couldn’t stand by and watch anymore.

“Stay in Eden as long as you want, but don’t you dare come near me or Ella or Theo or any other man in this place again, do you understand? You leave them alone. You leave me alone. I have enough to deal with right now without having to make sure you don’t get anyone else killed.”

I would have buckled if she’d looked at me, so I stormed out of the room and past Henry, who wordlessly followed me to my suite. I wanted to slam the door, but he was behind me. Pogo and Cerberus were still curled up together on the floor, and the pillow I kicked missed them by inches.

“Now what?” I said, turning on Henry. “Do we sit here and talk about what happened? Are we the judge? The jury? What happens now?”

“Nothing,” he said, giving Cerberus a scratch behind the ears. “You have already made your decision.”

I paused. “What?”

“Ava will not have any romantic contact with any men, nor will she have any contact with you or Ella,” said Henry, and I sat down heavily on the bed. “As for Theo, that is not a judgment I could possibly ask you to make. Not yet.”

“Why not?” I said, my throat dry with the realization that I wouldn’t see Ava again. After everything we’d both been through since September, I felt like I’d failed her. But in a way, hadn’t she failed herself? I knew it wasn’t her fault, not really—she couldn’t have predicted this would happen. She’d still been careless though, and I’d stood by and let her. This was on my shoulders, too. But no matter who was to blame, Xander was still dead.

“Because you do not yet have the ability to see past a lie.” He moved to my wardrobe and began to pick through clothing as if we were talking about the weather or something equally as mundane.