The Goddess Test (Goddess Test #1)(54)
Author: Aimee Carter

I spent the rest of the morning in bed crying. My head ached and my entire body was so sore that getting up didn’t seem possible, but all I could think about was the way Henry had looked at me before he’d left. As if he would never see me again.

It wasn’t fair, and for the life of me I didn’t understand why he was doing this. Was it because I’d said I loved him? It’d been quick, and I hadn’t given it much thought, but after I said it, I knew it was the truth. I was willing to do anything it took to give him another chance, even if it meant giving up any choice I had in my life, and if that didn’t equal love, I didn’t know what did. But it wasn’t like I expected him to love me in return.

The more I thought about it, the more I put the pieces together. The confession that fell off my tongue in a shower of words I couldn’t stop—the sudden need to be with him—the warning not to eat. I’d been poisoned. Except this time, so had Henry and Calliope, and we’d all survived.

It hadn’t been designed to kill me. It was an aphrodisiac.

Once I understood, everything seemed much clearer to me. The only question was who? Was someone trying to give me and Henry a push in the right direction, or was there something else to it? And if there was, who hated me enough to even try?

The only person I could think of was Ella. She hated Ava, and maybe if she thought I was on her side…or maybe she thought that getting rid of me would mean getting rid of Ava, too. With the way Ava had behaved lately, I almost couldn’t blame her. But what did Ella have to gain?

James? I dismissed the thought as quickly as it appeared. The last thing he wanted was to push me and Henry closer together. It was possible that this was his intention, for Henry to storm out and ignore me for the rest of my stay, but it was a risk I was sure James wouldn’t take. Giving Henry any excuse to fall for me and to fight for his realm would be dangerous. Besides, the only surefire way to stop it was to make me fail a test, and—

My blood turned to ice in my veins. Of course. The tests. Gluttony, the seven deadly sins—lust.

Despair filled the pit of my stomach. I’d failed, hadn’t I? Even if it wasn’t my fault, even if it had been an aphrodisiac, it didn’t matter. That had to be why Henry was so upset. Anything else didn’t make sense, unless he really had been forcing affection for my sake.

I didn’t want to think about that. I didn’t want to think about possibly failing either, so instead I dragged myself out of bed, grateful that Nicholas was stationed outside my room instead of inside. Without any painkillers, I had to deal with the aches and pains, apparent side effects of whatever drug I’d been given, but even those were duller now.

I dressed, and despite my protesting body, I picked up my clothes from the night before and remade the bed. The council had to see what had happened, that we’d been set up. If they were at all fair and just, they couldn’t fail me because of this. I clung to that hope, that one last chance, and forced myself to push any other possibility aside. Everything would be okay. It had to be.

Calliope came by shortly before sundown, looking about as sick as I felt. She was pale and trembling, and instead of sending her away, as Nicholas had with every other servant who tried to check on me, he offered his arm to her and escorted her inside.

“Calliope?” I said from my spot near the window, curled up in one of the overstuffed armchairs. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” she said with a tired smile as Nicholas helped her into a chair. “The more important question is, how are you?”

I waited until Nicholas left to answer, even though I was sure he could hear everything through the door. “Tired,” I admitted. “I ache a lot.”

That had unexpected results. Calliope’s face crumpled, and in less time than it took for me to haul myself out of my chair, she was sobbing. “Oh, Kate! I’m so sorry, I didn’t know until after I’d dropped it off, and I tried to send someone to warn you, but it was too late, and I didn’t know what to do—”

I knelt beside her chair, taking her hand. “Don’t apologize. You had no way of knowing, and I’m sorry they got to you, too.”

Her lower lip trembled, but she seemed to be making a valiant effort to keep herself in check. “I should have waited a few minutes. It was stupid of me, and it could have gotten you killed.”

“But you didn’t,” I said. “We’re both fine. All three of us are fine.”

She stared at me, her eyes almost unnaturally wide. “But did you and Henry…”

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “It’s fine, Calliope, really. If this works out, then that would’ve probably happened eventually anyhow. And if it doesn’t, I won’t remember it, so either way.”

The dark look on her face told me she didn’t believe me. I didn’t believe myself either. His extreme reaction to the drug had distracted me from thinking about the fact that something major had happened the night before, and it didn’t feel as if it’d totally sunk in. This was supposed to be a big deal; I was supposed to feel upset or dirty, or at the very least confused about what to feel about the whole thing. But at that point, I was far more concerned about Henry than I was myself.

“Why do you think it was inevitable that he go to bed with you?” said Calliope in a careful voice I couldn’t read. “There are rumors that he has never…that he and Persephone didn’t even…” She trailed off, clearly uncomfortable.

I opened my mouth, fully intending on saying something intelligent, but the only thing I managed to blurt out was, “He was a virgin?”

“No one knows for sure,” said Calliope quickly. “He was very possessive of Persephone, but he did love her. She just didn’t love him back, that’s all. They had separate bedrooms and everything.”

I frowned. “He doesn’t have to worry about that with me.”

“Which part?”

“The part where she didn’t love him back. I mean, if we’d met on the street or something, I probably wouldn’t have even bothered—I mean, he’s gorgeous.” I remembered what James had said so many months ago and managed a small smile. “He’s a ten. A twelve, even, and I’m nowhere near that. I would’ve never worked up the courage to talk to him on my own. But getting to know him…” It was pathetic and hard for me to admit, but it was the truth. And maybe if Calliope understood, she wouldn’t feel so guilty about letting it happen in the first place. “I love him. I don’t understand how anyone could know him and not love him.”