The Impact of You(18)
Author: Kendall Ryan

He’s still holding my limp hands in his. “It’s fine, Jase. You’re free to do whatever…whoever you want.”

“Okay, I know. I just…I want you to know that things really are over between her and me, despite what this looks like. I’m not with anybody right now.”

“Fine,” I say. I don’t know whether to be mad at him, myself, or Stacia. There are so many emotions running through my system – anger, hurt, embarrassment – that I don’t know what to think. For all my supposed caution in getting involved with Jase, I suddenly realize I’ve built up our bond in my head into something it’s not.

Jase pushes his fingers through his thick hair again, cursing himself under his breath. “She took a bunch of shots and begged me to let her stay. All I did was give her a blanket and leave her up here. She was passed out when I came to bed a couple of hours later.”

My hands are still trembling. That news conjures up the image of a drunk Stacia hanging all over him, begging him to take her to bed. I don’t think for a second that she accidently drank too much and needed to stay. She’s much too calculated for that. The urge to hit something is barely contained. “You know she does this on purpose, right?” I ask.

He shrugs. “Probably. She likes to mess things up for me.”

I decide then and there I won’t let Stacia run me off. I’ll stand my ground. If Jase wants me here, I’m staying.

Jase picks up the coffee from the dresser. “You got me coffee?”

I nod.

He pulls me in for a hug. “Thanks, Whistle.”

I stiffen in his arms. One step forward, two steps back.

Stacia chooses that moment to grace us with her presence again. Jase rolls his eyes at her before turning to me. “I’m going to take a quick shower. Wait for me, okay?”

“Sure.”

He grabs a towel and some clothes and leaves me and Stacia alone in his room. Damn, this is awkward.

She makes a production of lacing up her strappy heels and organizing the items in her obnoxiously bright orange purse. “Gosh, I don’t even remember what happened last night.” She chuckles, inspecting herself in her compact mirror. “But I guess that’ll happen when Jase is feeding you shots.”

I stay quiet, knowing if I open my mouth, it won’t be ladylike. But it takes everything in me, and I repeat a quiet manta in my head. Don’t sink to her level. Don’t sink to her level.

Once Stacia is packed and ready to go, she crosses the room and stops in front of me. “You know he and I are neighbors back home. We practically grew up together. We have a history that can’t be undone.” She studies me silently for a moment, and getting nothing in response, she chuckles to herself and continues on her way.

God! I want to hit something. Preferably her face. My blood is boiling. I pace Jase’s bedroom, too keyed up to sit down. Maybe all that caffeine was a bad idea. When I pass by his unmade bed, I can’t help but stop and stare at the little wicker trashcan sitting beside the bedside table. If they did have sex last night, that trashcan should contain a condom. I walk closer, my heart pounding and peer down into the wastebasket.

An empty water bottle, a wadded up a receipt from the gas station for a tank of gas and a toy whistle.

No condom wrapper.

A breath escapes my lungs in a whoosh of air, and I sink down onto his bed. It’s this moment I realize I like Jase way more than I have any right to. I’m in way over my head.

Chapter 13

Jase

When I return from the shower, Avery is curled up on my bed with my journal from our human sexuality class. What the…

“Avery?”

She sets the notebook down beside her. “I have soft skin? That’s it. That’s all you wrote?” She shakes her head in mock disgust, not at all self-conscious that I just busted her for snooping.

I cross the room and grab the journal. “Now you have to let me read yours.”

She smiles. “No way. Not when all you wrote was that cheesy line. You haven’t earned it.”

I sit down next to her. “Then let me earn it.”

She brings her palm to my cheek and meets my eyes. The banter between us dies away, and I’m left with a longing to my very core. Her eyes linger on my mouth. I’ve never wanted to kiss someone so bad in my entire life. My heart is pounding painfully in my chest while I wait to see what she’ll do next.

She reluctantly drops her hand and moves away from me on the bed. “Things went pretty well with Mitch last night.”

“Oh, right. Mitch.” That’s just f**king great. “My challenge was to talk to him. Not to go home with him.”

She swats my arm. “All we did was talk. He drove me home and was a perfect gentleman.”

“Good.” Thank f**king God. “Are you seeing him again?”

She lifts one shoulder. “Not sure. We’ll see if he calls.”

“He got the digits?”

She nods, smiling coyly.

Damn. That tiny, inconsequential fact shouldn’t make me want to punch something, but it does. I mean, Christ, she walked in to find Stacia in my bedroom this morning and she’s being so f**king cool about it. I need to pull it together.

Avery sits on my bed, still watching me, waiting for a reaction. I can’t be held responsible for my actions when her mouth is so lush and pink. It’s practically taunting me. I stand and place my hands on my hips, needing to infuse some humor into the situation. Otherwise, I’m going to kiss her again, and that clearly isn’t what she wants.

“Well, since it seems you’re really excelling at the challenges I’m dishing up, it looks like we’re ready for something more advanced.” I hope she can’t tell I’m literally making this up as I go.

A musical ringtone fills the silence and Avery lunges for her phone. “Oh, hang on one sec, it might be Mitch.”

Shit f**k.

* * *

I lie in bed, still wondering if I handled things right with Avery. I practically pushed her into Mitch’s arms last night. But of course that was after she told me she wasn’t ready for anything. What can he give her that I can’t?

Before I call her for our nightly chat, I dial my mom’s cell.

She answers on the first ring. “Jasey?”

I inwardly groan at the nickname. “Hey, Mom.”

“Hi honey. What’s up? Calling to check on me?”

I smile. No use beating around the bush with her. “I guess so, yeah. How are you?”