The Tied Man

Lilith handed me glass of water, but my hands were shaking so much that I couldn’t take a drink without spilling half the contents across the sheets.

She took the glass from me and held it to my mouth with one hand and supported the back of my head with the other.  ‘Steady – just take a couple of sips for now.’

‘Bad?’  I dared ask, and she nodded.

I shifted to look at her properly, and winced.  ‘Fuck, I hurt.  Must’ve been hardcore.’

‘It was.’ 

The realisation made me want to throw up again.  ‘She made you watch.’

Lilith nodded.  ‘Part of my re-education. And the final part, believe me.’

‘Oh God, Lili, I’m so sorry.’  That useless, empty word again, for everything I had let happen to her.  ‘I can’t stay here…’  I made to get out of bed again, but the world shimmered and shifted around me and I had to swallow a mouthful of bile.  I wondered when my stomach was going to catch on that there was nothing left to bring up.

I shut my eyes and forced everything back behind a wall that was harder to maintain with every second I remained in this room.  I didn’t dare speak or move or even breathe for fear of everything crumbling away and leaving me entirely destroyed.  I couldn’t show her that, for both our sakes.

The knock at the door threatened to tip the balance, even though I knew Coyle wouldn’t see the need for such manners.

‘It’s Blaine,’ Lilith said.  ‘It’s fine, Finn.  I’ve been expecting this; it’s part of it.  It’s what she does, remember?  She wants to gloat.’  She tied her hair back from her face and strode to the door.

Lilith

‘Good morning, Lilith.’  Blaine stepped into my room, dressed for a day at the office.  She appraised me, still in my pyjamas with my hair messily scraped back from my face and smiled.

‘Good morning.’  She wouldn’t have been able to resist a trip to view the damage, and part of me was surprised that she’d stayed away for this long.  She would want to gaze upon the wreckage of her own making, and prolong the pleasure for as long as possible. I was ready for it, but I feared for Finn.

‘You look exhausted,’ she said.

‘It’s been a long night.’

She almost looked maternal.  ‘You should rest today. Our agreement still stands and you seem to be remarkably ahead of schedule – I’m sure you can spare yourself a few hours to recharge.’ It was as if Finn was invisible.

‘I wasn’t aware there was a schedule, other than completing the commission.’

‘Ah.’  She took the chair I had used for my vigil and turned it so she was facing me.  ‘I’m so sorry; I thought I’d mentioned it.  My birthday – it’s in a little less than four weeks; the tenth of December.  I usually have a small gathering, just my closest friends, nothing too formal.  I thought that might be a fantastic opportunity for the great unveiling.  What do you think?’

‘It sounds ideal.’  The very moment I spoke, an embryonic light glinted in the furthest recesses of my mind.  I didn’t dare acknowledge its presence for fear that I might extinguish it, or that Blaine might read the scrap of  hope in my features.  I promised myself that I would revisit it the moment I got the opportunity, and returned to the business in hand: getting Blaine where I wanted her.  ‘There are a few finishing touches, but nothing that’ll take more than a few days.’

‘Excellent.  Well, I’ll leave you to your day off.’   She placed the chair tidily by the bedside, still without so much as glancing at Finn.

I still had no real idea what I was going to do, but I needed to buy time; make my first move.  ‘Blaine?’

‘Yes?’

‘Do you think we could talk later?  Please?  In private, I mean.’

I was rewarded with the hint of a smile that suggested she knew she’d finally worn me down.  Gracious in victory, she nodded.  ‘I’ll be free at eleven.  You can come to my study.’

‘Thank you.’  I forced as much humility and gratitude as I possibly could into the words.

I thought Blaine was about to leave, but at the last second she turned to Finn.  ‘You should be grateful to Lilith for taking the time to look after you, darling.’

‘I am.’

‘Good.  And thank you for last night’s entertainment.  You were very… versatile, is perhaps the best word.  Chester and Ellis were delighted with your performance.  They asked that I gave you their gratitude, and let you know that they’re hoping to spend some more time with you in the spring.’ Blaine reached inside her jacket.  ‘I thought you might like a reminder of your talents.’ She dealt three photographs of the previous night’s savagery neatly on the duvet.   ‘You’ve always been the most photogenic of my staff.’