The Wild Ones (The Wild Ones #1)(50)
Author: M. Leighton

I feel tears burning at the backs of my eyes. “But if I could just—”

“He’s gone. Let him go. Let our family heal. It’s what he wants. Don’t embarrass yourself.”

A ten-inch knife to the heart couldn’t hurt any worse. I feel like someone is cutting out my soul and setting fire to everything that makes me happy, to everything that ever could make me happy.

“Could you tell him…” I trail off. It’s no use. If she even agreed to give him a message, which I doubt she would, there’s no guarantee that she’s wrong, that Trick would want to hear from me. No, if he wants me, he’ll come back for me. He knows where to find me.

Without another word, I turn to the door and open the screen, stepping out onto the porch. Before I let it shut behind me, I look back at LeeAnne Henley. She looks sad and broken and beaten. Just like I feel.

“If it matters at all, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything that I had nothing to do with and for all the pain my family has caused yours. But I can’t be sorry for loving Trick. I feel bad for having a good life, but he’s still the best thing to ever happen to me.”

Although she looks unaffected, she nods once. Without having to ask, I know that’s all I’ll get from her. I let the door fall shut behind me and walk away.

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT – Trick

“Are you sure this is what you wanna do, man?” Rusty asks.

I give his question some serious thought. I’ve asked myself the same thing a dozen times in the last week. But I always come to the same conclusion. “I have to. Besides, it doesn’t mean what it used to.”

“Whatever mistakes your dad made, this was still something good you two had together. He wanted you to have this car. And your mom wanted you to keep it. If you let it go, that’s it.”

I nod. “I know. But it just doesn’t make sense to hold onto something like this when getting rid of it could make things so much easier.”

“Dude, you make it sound like holding on to something you love is a bad thing.”

“Sometimes it is.”

“Are we still talking about the car?”

My eyes snap up to Rusty’s sharp blue ones. He’s so laid back, so devil-may-care, I forget there’s a really smart, perceptive, occasionally wise guy in there.

“I think so.”

“Don’t you think you ought to give it one more shot?”

“Rus, we need the money. This car can fix almost all my problems and help me get started in a business that can give Grace and Mom the stability they’ve needed since before Dad. I have to do it.”

“I wasn’t talking about the car.”

“Oh,” I say, deadpan. “She hates me. And I don’t blame her. I shouldn’t have told her. But it’s done. If she wants me, she knows where to find me. I’m respecting her decision by staying away. I’ve hurt her enough.”

“Does she know you love her?”

“What makes you think I love her?”

Rusty just looks at me. At first, he doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t have to.

“You and Cami are the only two who don’t know you’re in love with her. And she’s in love with you. If you let stupid shit your parents did a hundred freakin’ years ago come between you now, you both deserve to die alone. That’s just idiotic.”

I stare at him. He’s right of course. But it’s not my decision to make. It’s Cami’s.

“Damn, Rus. Why don’t you just let it out? Be honest and tell me the truth about how you feel?”

He grins. “I feel like the inmates are running the prison these days, Trick. You haven’t been right since you met that girl. At least you were still okay, though. But now…this is crazy. Just go get her and get it over with.”

“I can’t do that. It’s because I care about her that I’m leaving it up to her. She has to be willing to let it go, too. We’ll never be able to have anything if either of us is living in the past, holding on to all that trash.”

He shrugs. “Your loss, man. I still think you’re stupid. Women love that grand gesture crap. You’ve seen enough movies to know.”

“Because movies are definitely what men should use as their romantic decision-making paradigm.”

“Decision-what-a-what?”

“Drop the act. You forget I know you. I know you’re more than just a dumb grease monkey.”

Rusty smiles.

“You’re a crazy, delusional dumb grease monkey,” I add.

“Awww, that’s just wrong.”

He feints left and punches me in the right shoulder. “Wanna go a couple rounds? You know, like we used to before you went and got yourself whipped?”

“I’m not whipped.”

“Well, whatever you call it. What do you say? Got a brand new bottle of Patron, all wrapped up and waiting for just such an occasion.”

“Nah. I don’t really feel much like drinking.”

Rusty straightens. “Dude! Since when? You’ve been partying less and less since you met her. Does she have your balls, too?”

Rusty’s right. The urge to drown my troubles has been present much less often since I met Cami. Just another good thing about her that I’ll be left to mourn.

“Shut up! You remember what happened last time we threw down in here, right?”

The last time we rough-housed in his garage, we’d knocked over two tool chests, busted the hose to his air compressor, dented a metal cabinet, spilled an oil pan then sat in the pit and drained a fifth of Patron.

“I’ll take my chances, because this time, I’m gonna kick your ass. No more Mr. Niceguy.”

“Bring it, monkey boy.”

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE – Cami

Like I have every morning for three weeks, I get up first thing and go to the window to look down at the stable. And just like every morning for the past three weeks, today there is no sign of Trick. There never is.

When are you gonna get it through your thick head that he’s gone and he’s not coming back?

My chest hurts. Just saying those words to myself makes me feel like something inside me is shriveling up and dying. Deep down, I know I’ll never find someone like Trick. I think I had my suspicions at the time, but I didn’t really delve into them too much because it seemed too soon. But now, now I know that Trick was the one. He still is the one. He always will be.

But he’s gone. So where does that leave me?