Until Lilly

“You came!” she says happily, looking at me, then her mom.

“I told you I would.” I smile.

“I know, but...” She pauses, looking back at her mom.

“I told you he would be here,” Lilly reassures her, and Ashlyn shrugs, going back to mixing.

“Is it time to add eggs?” Lilly asks her.

“Yes, can I crack them?”

“How about if Cash helps you crack them while I start the bacon?”

“Okay.” She smiles, and all I can think is how much I love her already. “Is that for me?” she asks, pointing to the doll that’s still in my hand.

“It is,” I tell her, sitting the doll on the counter. “How about if she watches while we make breakfast?”

“Okay,” she says, looking at the doll as I place it on the counter in front of her.

“Here you go.” Lilly hands me three eggs and a bowl. “We don’t want to eat egg shells, so this is easier,” she says quietly before walking back to the fridge, bending over. I have to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from groaning. I haven’t been with anyone since my divorce; I learned a hard lesson when that shit went down. It wouldn’t matter though; even if I had been f**king everything that walked, Lilly had always done it for me. She is the perfect package of sweet and sexy. Watching her with our daughter is completely different than watching Jules with Jax. When we lived together, I may as well have been a single father. The only time Jules had anything to do with Jax was when it was time to show him off like a new handbag, but the minute he served his purpose, she would hand him back to me. I shake my head and turn, just as I see Lilly’s head come up.

“You ready to do this?” I set down the bowl, hand Ashlyn one egg, watch as she taps it lightly to the countertop, and when she gets it to crack, she lifts it over the bowl. Both of her small hands wrap around the egg and her hands squeeze, crushing it. I laugh, looking at the bowl that is now full of shells and egg.

“I did it!” She smiles, and it’s just like her mom’s, bright and blinding.

“You did.” I nod, handing her another egg. She follows the same steps two more times; I take the bowl away from her, along with one of the egg shells so that I can fish all the broken pieces out of the bowl. I feel the weight hit my chest and look up to see Lilly watching us. She’s smiling, but she also looks sad. I reach over, running my finger down her arm; she shakes her head, looks away and puts more bacon into the pan.

“Now we hab to mix it.” I finish removing the shells and hand her the eggs so she can dump them into the mixing bowl.

“Here.” Lilly hands me a measuring cup full of milk, and I dump it in while Ashlyn stirs.

“Where are the pans?” I ask Lilly, my hand at her waist. I feel her shiver as my fingers flex against her.

“What?” She looks over her shoulder at me and I spread my fingers out, putting slight pressure on her waist. “What are you doing?” she asks.

“Asking where the pans are.” I smile when she gives a slight growl, stepping out of my grasp.

“Does your wife know you’re here?” She covers her mouth, looking over at Ashlyn who is not paying any attention to what we’re doing; she is still happily stirring the batter.

“My wife?” My fists clench. She clears her throat.

“Never mind. The pans are next to the sink.” I grab her hand, forcing her to follow me. We’re going to get this shit settled right now. “Now what are you doing?”

“We’re going to get a few things straight.” I turn her so her back is against the wall, and she presses against my chest, trying to shove me away. Her size compared to mine makes it impossible.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” she asks, and I press into her. We’re just around the corner from where Ashlyn is sitting. If I lean back, I can see her.

I put my mouth near her ear so I don’t have to talk too loudly. “I am not f**king married.” I press my hips into hers. “I was married. It didn’t last long. I hated my wife. I hated the reasons why I had to marry her. I missed you every day, but I do not regret marrying her because I have my son now.” Her eyes search mine; she crosses her arms over her chest. I pull her arms apart, putting them up above her head.

“Stop,” she cries, wiggling and trying to get free. Her breathing speeds up, her eyes drop to my mouth, and just like that, it’s on. My body presses the length of hers, and keeping her hands above her head, I attack her mouth. I lick her bottom lip and her mouth opens under mine. My tongue touches hers and I coax hers into my mouth then suck hard, making her moan. She pulls back, biting my lip. I drop her hands and fist her hair, forcing her head one way and tilt mine the other. I missed this; I forgot how much I loved kissing her, and she could f**king kiss like no other. I pull back, laying my forehead on hers, trying to catch my breath and calm the hard-on that is making my jeans way too tight.

“I'm going to make you fall in love with me again,” I tell her without thinking.

“What?” she asks as I press my mouth to hers one more time, not answering her question. I step away, walking back into the kitchen to finish making breakfast.

I look over at Lilly, who is standing on the other side of the counter. “This weekend we will be going to my mom and dad’s for a bar-b-que.” I run my hand down Ashlyn’s hair then look at Lilly. “I will come pick you up with Jax, and we can head over there together.”

“Um,” she mumbles, looking confused. Her lips are swollen and her cheeks are a light pink. Trevor’s words come back to me again. I don’t know if he is right, but I guess we will find out.

“You should pack a bag and we should have a sleepover this weekend,” I say, making Lilly’s eyes grow wide.

“Yay, sleep over!” Ashlyn claps, making me smile and bend over to kiss the top of her head.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Lilly states, crossing her arms over her chest, showing off the curves of her br**sts.

“Well, if we’re going to go to the zoo Saturday morning, it will be easier if we all sleep in the same place. I mean, Jax and I could stay here, but you don’t have as many rooms as I do.” I shrug like it’s no big deal either way.

“Were going to the zoo?” Ashlyn whispers, looking at her mom. Lilly’s eyes fly to hers, and her face completely changes. “Can we, really?” Ashlyn asks.