Up to Me (The Bad Boys #2)(4)
Author: M. Leighton

Watching me from the corner of her eye, she turns and starts walking slowly toward the cut-out. With the bar between us, I walk with her.

“That’s right.  I did mention it before.  I remember telling you how amazing you are.  I think we were in front of a mirror.”  My dick twitches behind my zipper just thinking about sliding into Olivia from behind and coming inside her in the ladies’ bathroom at Tad’s. “Does that sound familiar?”

As she walks, she glances up at me from the corner of her eye.  I see the flash of hot desire.  I know she remembers it just as perfectly as I do.

She clears her throat.  “Um, yeah.  That seems vaguely familiar.” Her grin is playful.

God, what a tease!

“Vaguely?  Maybe I didn’t pound it into you hard enough.”

“Oh, I think you pounded it in plenty hard.”

“Maybe I should’ve taken the time to give you a good tongue-lashing, too, then.”

“Oh, I think the form of communication you used was very effective.”

“So it’s all coming back to you now?”

“Yes, it’s all coming back to me.”

“If you’re lying, I could sweat it out of you, you know.”

“I’m not lying.  It’s etched into my memory. Permanently.”

“Maybe we should revisit it, just so you’re clear on everything we discussed.  I want to make sure it’s in there.  Nice and deep.  So you never forget it.”

Finally her grin turns into a giggle just as we’re nearing the cut-out at the end of the bar.  When she rounds the corner, I’m there blocking her way with my body.

“I doubt there’s anything you could do to get it in there any deeper.”

“Oh, I can think of one or two things.  The only way we’ll know for sure, though, is to try. And I don’t know about you, but I’m committed to this.  Invested.  And I’m nothing if not thorough.”

I see something flicker in her eyes just before the light goes out and she seems to cool off.  Before I can puzzle too long over it, she changes the subject.

“Oh! I nearly forgot.  Marissa.  What did she want?”

Again, I get the feeling that something’s not quite right.

Apparently now’s not the time to talk about what’s bothering her.  But I know something’s up.

“Right.  Marissa.  She was looking for Nash.  Obviously.  She also wants to talk to you. Said she’d left you a couple of messages, but that she’ll talk to you tonight.  She’s gonna wait up.”

Either I’m crazy or there’s a little relief in Olivia’s expression.

“Yeah, my phone’s in my purse. I haven’t checked it yet.  I guess I’d better get going then. See what she wants.  I mean, we can’t blow this.  It’d be a disaster if she found out about…you.”

“Olivia, I told you I’d give up this thing with Dad.  And if that means—”

“Absolutely not!  It’s important, Cash!  He’s your father and he’s in prison for something he didn’t do.  No, you’re not giving up anything.  For me or for anybody else.  We just have to be careful.”

At least she’s still saying “we” and counting herself as being involved.  With me and everything else.

“You know I’d do it for you, though.  To keep you safe.”

“But I don’t want you to do that. I’m perfectly safe.  There’s nothing to worry about.  We’ll just have to take things as they come.”

I get the feeling there’s a double entendre that I’m not quite getting.  Yep.  Something’s definitely up with her.

“So, do you plan to tell Marissa about us then?” she asks.

“That’s up to you.  Me? I don’t care who knows, but I know you do.  Especially the people around here.”

“But you know why, right?”

“Yeah, I understand.  That’s why I stayed away most of the night.  It’s hard as hell to keep my hands off you.  And my eyes.  But I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

Olivia’s cheeks turn a pretty pink.  “Really?’

“Really what?”

“You really can’t keep your eyes off me?”

“God, to be so smart, you’re thick-headed.  Have I not made the way I feel about you abundantly clear?”

I thought I had, but maybe what’s clear to me isn’t so obvious to her. If that’s the case, I’ll have to make a point of being more…forthcoming.

Olivia shrugs and shifts her eyes to the side.  I move in closer and bend until she looks at me.

“Hey, I know this is all new and I know how you feel about guys like me.”  She starts to interrupt, but I stop her with a finger across her lips.  “But I hope you’re starting to see that there’s more to me than you first thought.  Than what you first assumed.  You have to remember that I’m playing a part, too.  One that would be even trickier if I didn’t make each one so extreme.  You know that in some ways I’m both guys and in some ways I’m neither.”

“How will I ever know the real you then?”

I can see the worry in her eyes; I just don’t know what has happened in the last little while to put it there.  I thought we’d moved past all this.

I brush her satiny cheek with the backs of my fingers.  “You already do.  You’ll just have to look past some of the things you see when we’re around other people. I have to keep up appearances if you want me to go through with my plans.”

She watches me closely. I’d love to know what’s going through her mind, but I have a feeling that, in a thousand years, she’d never tell me.

Finally, she shakes her head.

“I still want you to go through with it.  And I’ll do my best to look…deeper than what I see.  It just might take some getting used to.”

“I understand that.  This is not an easy thing, the life I lead.  It’s been my focus, all I’ve lived for the last seven years.  But it’s necessary.”

“I know that.  And I’m trying.”

“That’s all I ask.”

An awkward silence slides between us and I hate it. I feel like there are things being left unsaid.