Wanted (Most Wanted #1)(18)
Author: J. Kenner

He took a step closer to me, and despite my irritation, my pulse kicked into high gear. “And now you’re not doing either,” he said.

“Oh.” The word escaped my lips, more breath than sound. It wasn’t even the sound I wanted to make. What I wanted, was to ask why. Why was he there? Why had he shoved the guy away? He’d followed me here, of course. The odds that this was a coincidence were simply too astronomical to fathom. But why? Did he regret walking away from me on the roof? Was he jealous of Kevin? Or, for that matter, of Bruiser?

Or was he simply watching over me? Looking out for me the way that Jahn had said he always would?

“He was dangerous, Angie,” Evan said, leading me to the edge of the dance floor. “And what the fuck are you doing here, anyway?”

My eyes snapped to his face, and the words were out before I could think better of them. “Maybe I like dangerous men.”

He hesitated only a heartbeat before replying, but even if he’d planned the words for a year, he couldn’t have cut me deeper. “Maybe you shouldn’t.”

Without thinking, I lashed out, intending to slap his face. I didn’t make it. He caught my wrist and pulled me close until I was mere millimeters from him, the heat from our bodies so intense I feared I might spontaneously combust.

He stood a full head taller than me, and he had me so close that my lips were almost pressed to the indentation at the base of his neck. He smelled like sin and despite how riled up I was, I had to fight the urge to sneak my tongue out and taste him.

He bent his head, his breath brushing over the top of my ear as he whispered to me. “I get it,” he said simply.

I went completely stiff. “What exactly do you get?”

“That you’re still crying for him.”

I felt frozen and my breath caught in my throat. Somehow, I managed to force my words out. “What do you mean?”

Something brushed my hair, and though I couldn’t know for certain, I imagined it was his lips. For a moment he didn’t answer, just held me. The thrum of the music pounding through me had nothing on the surge of blood through my veins. I wanted to stay like that forever. Lost in a forest of the senses. Lost in his arms.

This was what I’d craved—why I’d come out tonight. Not the club or the music or the alcohol, but this. The numbness vanquished, my senses on overdrive.

I’d known that the music and the dancing would get me there. That I’d be able to thrust my hand through the curtain and draw in at least a moment or two of real, solid sensation, even if most of it slipped through my fingers like trying to clutch sand.

But I’d never imagined this. Never imagined that I even had it in me to feel so much all at once. To know—to really and truly know—that I was alive.

I swallowed again. Part of me was afraid to speak for fear of breaking this spell. But another part of me had to know. “Evan?” I finally whispered, not at all certain he’d be able to hear me over the roar of the club around us. “What do you get?”

“You,” he said simply, and though it couldn’t possibly be true, right then it was the best thing he could have said to me.

“I miss him,” I said hoarsely, as if that explained why I was going wild in a sleazy club instead of curled up under a blanket sipping hot cocoa and crying.

“I know,” he said, and I felt a shiver run through me because I knew it was true. He knew. Not about the numbness. Not about the times I couldn’t take it anymore and had to fight through the fog. But about tonight and my grief and everything that I’d lost. About the fact that being here in this anonymous crowd with music pumping through my veins took the edge off just a little. It filled up the black hole of grief and loss. Made it bearable.

I didn’t understand how, but he got it. Everything that Kevin couldn’t see in me, Evan did.

I eased back so that I could tilt my head up, and found those gray eyes on me. Wolf’s eyes, I’d thought earlier, and the analogy was even more apt now. I saw danger there. Hunger. As if he would gleefully eat me alive.

And oh, dear god, I wanted him to. “Why are you here?” I whispered.

“You wanted to fly. I wanted to make sure you didn’t crash.”

“So you’re just looking out for me?” I held his eyes, drawing courage from the need I saw reflected back at me. “Or are you interested in helping with liftoff?”

His words were slow and measured. “It’s never wise for a princess to tease a dragon.”

“Who says I’m teasing?”

“It’s not wise to tempt one, either.”

“Why not?” My voice was breathy and full of need.

“Dragons burn. And the wounds leave scars.”

“What if I don’t care?”

He didn’t answer, but his eyes darkened and I knew damn well that he wanted this, too.

“Evan.” I didn’t realize that I’d spoken his name aloud until I heard my own voice, soft and low like a plea.

He shook his head slowly. “No.”

The word was firm and insistent—and I didn’t believe it for a second. This was my chance. My one shining, sparkling moment. I shouldn’t push—I knew that. Hadn’t I already told myself that this was a line I shouldn’t cross? That I needed to keep myself in check. That I needed to not push that envelope.

But dammit all, when I looked at his face, I knew without a doubt that I could fall with Evan. If he would make the jump with me, I was absolutely certain that he wouldn’t let me get hurt. He’d said it himself—he knew how to keep control. And I so desperately wanted to let go of it.

Fear and desire and an odd unwelcome shyness twisted inside of me. I was risking everything but I couldn’t stop. I had to have him. At the very least, I had to try. “Please,” I said simply.

“I stopped being reckless years ago,” Evan said, his tone firm and determined. “That shit gets you in trouble.”

I swallowed. Every ounce of reason told me that he was right,—that I needed to take a step back. That I needed to stop, to go home, to count to ten. To calm the fuck down.

I didn’t do any of that. Instead, I took a step closer. “So now you’re all about control?”

A muscle in his cheek twitched. “Yes,” he said simply, but I knew that he was fighting to hold it together. I could see the tension in him, and a surge of feminine satisfaction cut through me because I knew with absolute certainty that if I pushed him, he would break.