Wasted Words by Staci Hart
But she was her. I was me. And we weren’t together. She didn’t want me.
No, she wanted me to date Adrienne.
I puzzled over it all, tried to push it away and pump myself up for the date, but by the time I reached her apartment, I was still distracted, feeling distant, lost in my thoughts.
I should have been cheered by Adrienne’s smile. I should have appreciated the way she looked in the deep red dress she wore. I should have felt better when she hooked her arm in mine and we made our way to dinner.
But I didn’t.
Our salads had been carried away before she asked me if I was all right, and I took a sip of my wine, knowing I had to at least get my head straight enough to entertain her through dinner.
“I’m sorry. I’m fine.” I sat back in my chair, watching her across the flicker of the candle between us, doing my best at small talk. “Cam says you do cosplay?”
She smiled reassuringly. “I really just go because Sarah hates going alone. Too many creeps, she says. But it’s fun dressing up. She’s so into it, watches anime pretty much nonstop. She’s read more comics than I’ve watched Law & Order.”
I chuckled. “Well, if what you say is true, that’s impressive.”
“Sarah’s convinced me to read a few, but it’s not really my thing. I actually prefer non-fiction.”
“I’m the same way. Cam’s been trying to find a book for me to fall in love with since I met her, but so far, no luck. The last one was The Martian. Should have watched the movie first, but she wouldn’t let me.”
“It’s a good one. You into movies?”
“Over books, definitely.” I shifted, turning my wine glass by the stem, struggling to keep the conversation going. “I feel like I should ask you your sign or something.”
She laughed. “Scorpio. Don’t look so scared — I’m at least self-aware enough not to stab people with my opinions. Often, at least.”
“I’m a Pisces.”
“Ah,” she said knowingly. “Go with the flow. Selfless, loyal. Cam’s good. Astrologically, we’re a match made in heaven.”
“She just seems to know things, like a sixth sense. She’s just hyper-observant, I think.”
“Well, it’s a pretty impressive trick. So you used to play for Nebraska, right?”
I took a drink and nodded. “Tight end. Injured junior year. Jack offered me a job, thankfully, because I couldn’t go back.”
She bit her lip. “I read a little about it. I’m so sorry.”
I smirked. “You studied up on me?”
Her cheeks flushed. “I make sure to at least search my dates’ names on the internet. That’s just being responsible.”
I laughed. “Maybe I should take notes. It’s been a minute since I’ve dated.”
“Any reason?”
“No, nothing specific. Just hadn’t found anybody I was interested in enough to pursue.”
“Well, I’m glad I chased you down.”
I smiled and lied. “Me too.”
She took a sip of her wine. “So, what does Tyler Knight do for fun on the weekends?
“Cam and I watch football every weekend that I’m not traveling. In the summer, she dragged me to a bunch of indie films and a couple of conventions, but otherwise, not much. I’ve been told I’m boring.”
She chuckled. “Well, I have to disagree with that. Were the cons all that bad?”
“Nah. I actually had a great time. She’s easy to get along with — like she’s just one of those people who makes everything fun, you know? I just like to mess with her about it.”
“So what about you though? I mean, what are you interested in?”
My brow dropped a hair, and I tried not to frown. “I play chess, and video games sometimes. But mostly, it’s football. It’s just that’s only a few months out of the year. The rest of the time, I’m pretty open, so I just tag along with Cam wherever she’s going. Otherwise I’d probably just be addicted to Netflix like the rest of the population.”
“It’s a real epidemic. So, you two are close, huh?” She took a sip of her drink, watching me.
I sighed, not knowing why I kept bringing her up. “Yeah. I mean, when I met her, I’d just come out of a long-term thing that didn’t end well. I have friends, don’t get me wrong, but …” I paused, not even sure where I was going with any of it. Not that I could stop rambling. “Everything changed when I was injured. You look at your life, the course of it, and you think you’ve got it figured out, you know? But then one day it’s gone. That dream disappears, and you’ve got to figure everything out.”
“I get that,” she said quietly.
“Well, everyone else I knew got their dreams in one way or another. Part of me is glad it turned out this way. I’ve seen what going pro has done to some of the guys I know, and even though I’d like to think I’d hold onto who I am, who knows if I could have. In any event, I just didn’t fit anywhere after that. I want to stay connected to the game, but sometimes it hurts. And Cam … well, she was the first person in a long time who didn’t care about any of that. She just saw me. So, the short answer is yeah. We’re close.”
“I’m glad you have her.”
I swallowed hard. “Yeah, me too.”
“Do you … are you two …”
I shook my head. “Cam’s never shown any interest in that,” I said, answering too honestly, catching myself too late.