When Summer Comes (Whiskey Creek #3)(70)
Author: Brenda Novak

* * *

Callie was determined to live in the moment. She refused to think about anything else—the stint in the hospital that had come before or everything that would likely come after. For now, she felt completely content and fulfilled and didn’t want the slightest detail to change.

“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” Levi murmured.

They’d been in bed since he got home nearly three hours ago. They hadn’t even bothered to get up and eat. At one point, she’d finally gone to the kitchen to remove their dinner from the oven, but by then it was too late. They could still smell the charred remains of the roast she’d been cooking, despite having opened all the windows.

But even the loss of her great meal did nothing to tarnish her happiness.

“Callie?”

He’d asked her a question. Pulling herself out of her thoughts, she briefly pressed her lips to his chest. “The Thorn Birds.”

“The what?”

“It’s a novel, a sort of epic historical. My mother gave me a copy when I was in high school. It’s one of her all-time favorites.”

He lifted her chin so he could look into her face. “What made you think of it?”

She admired the thick fringe of lashes that framed his eyes. “There was something in that book about a mythical bird that spends its whole life searching for thorn trees. When it finds the perfect thorn, it impales itself.”

“Why would it do that?”

“I don’t remember, but it’s while dying that it sings its most beautiful song.”

He covered a yawn. “Sounds depressing.”

“In a way, but sometimes pain and loss are worth a moment like that, don’t you think?”

He shifted so he could nuzzle her neck. “Let’s just say I’m not tempted to read it.”

She smiled at his response.

“Why did you think of suicidal birds right now, anyway?” he asked.

Closing her eyes, she tried to commit every detail of how he felt to memory. She was going to need those positive associations later, to sustain her through the hard times. “I really liked the book.”

He leaned over her. “I have bad news.”

Instinctively, she stiffened. Was this where he said he was about to move on? That he’d be leaving in the morning?

She knew it was coming….

“Whoa, relax,” he said, obviously noticing her reaction. “I shouldn’t have put it like that. I was just going to say that now we’ve let our dinner burn, I’m hungry.”

She chuckled. “I’m not surprised.”

“What about you? Any interest in food?”

“Not too much. I have some peanut butter and jelly, though. I can make sandwiches.”

She started to get up, but he pulled her back. “You’re not trying to lose weight, are you?”

This time she was more careful about hiding her reaction. “Not really. Why?”

“You look thinner than the pictures I’ve seen of you. And most of your clothes are fitting pretty loosely.”

She shrugged as if it was nothing to be concerned about. “I had a few pounds to lose.”

“So you’re okay?” he asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Sometimes…sometimes you seem so tired.”

She caught her breath. “We’ve missed a lot of sleep in the past couple of weeks.”

“This is different. It’s more like…weariness. When I see it in your face, I get the feeling that…I don’t know…that something might be wrong. Like that time I saw you leaning on the kitchen table right after I got here.”

Callie knew if she was ever going to tell Levi about her liver, now was the time. But then it would ruin her moment, which she’d sworn to preserve. She was still clinging to the dream that he’d drive off and never have to find out.

“I’m fine.” She pecked his lips. “Let’s get those sandwiches going.”

* * *

“What are you doing?”

Callie forced a smile as Levi came into the room. After dinner, he’d gone into the bathroom while she’d gone to the linen closet. “Just making up your bed.”

He came closer. “That’s what I thought.”

“It’s okay if you sleep here, isn’t it?”

“The question is why would you want me to?”

Because she didn’t dare let him sleep with her. Thanks to the sandwich she’d eaten, she wasn’t feeling well again. She didn’t want to risk being sick in front of him. She’d be embarrassed after all the lies she’d told. But, more than that, she already cared too much about him, didn’t want him to suffer the same loss her parents and friends would. That meant she had to be careful to maintain some distance. “I thought…since you’re only here for a short time we probably shouldn’t risk getting too close.”

His eyebrows slid up. “Sharing a bed is too close, but having sex isn’t?”

She didn’t know what to say to that. “We just…need to keep our…relationship in perspective,” she said, trying again.

He propped his hands on his hips, which made him look sexy and displeased at the same time, since he was wearing no shirt and his hair was standing up on one side. “What exactly does that mean?”

“It means I don’t want to hurt you in the end.”

“You’re shutting me out now so you won’t hurt me later?”

“Who knows how this will go? Life is uncertain, right? I’m also protecting myself. I don’t want my heart broken when you drive off.” It was too late for that, but at least she’d reconciled herself to reality. He didn’t know what her reality was.

“So that’s it. We’re back to goodbye again.”

She could no longer meet his eyes. “Not for a few days, I hope.”

“Why do you always have to talk about the end? And how I can back out if I want? Or get with another woman? Why can’t we just…be where we’re at and go from here?”

“Because I think we should prepare for the inevitable, don’t you?”

He came over and took the blanket she’d been putting on the sofa away from her. “Is that why you haven’t pushed me to tell you my name? Because you see our relationship as being so brief, so temporary?”

“I asked you what your real name was.”

“Once. Immediately after you learned that the name I’d given you wasn’t correct.”