Wicked Burn(49)
Author: Beth Kery

Since he began to have periods of lucidity just before Christmas, Niall had made a point of visiting him at least once a week, often several times. She’d spoken with Rose Gonzalez and Dr. Fardesh at length about whether it would actually be helpful for her to come, determined to do what was right under these circumstances and not just whatever her parents determined was appropriate. The only reason she’d agreed to come at all was because Dr. Fardesh said that Stephen had begun to mention not only Niall’s name but Michael’s, both during his brief sessions with Dr. Fardesh and with his art therapist.

“I get the impression that Stephen is trying to work through something, Niall,” Dr. Fardesh had explained last week. “This medication regime we have him on is no cure, of course, but it might be giving him some psychological resources to try and cope, at least minimally, with his past. He’s been drawing pictures of Michael during his art therapy sessions. A few days ago he asked me how old Michael would have been today if he had lived. As you know, that sort of acknowledgment of Michael—let alone his death—has been unprecedented for Stephen since he’s been under my care.”

Niall had been flabbergasted by the news. To her knowledge, Michael’s name hadn’t passed Stephen’s lips since their four-year-old son’s funeral. It was soon afterward that her husband began to drink heavily and that his behavior became increasingly erratic, agitated, and eventually violent. By the time Matthew Manning’s trial came around, Stephen had declined both physically and psychologically to such a degree that Niall had no choice but to hospitalize him.

He hadn’t been out of a hospital or psychiatric facility for a single day since then.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Niall had asked Dr. Fardesh.

“Just continue to do what you have been doing: listen and offer him support. You know that Rose told him about the divorce proceedings?”

Niall nodded. She’d been glad to hear from Rose Gonzalez that she had indeed ended up informing Stephen back in December about their divorce, after he’d shown several weeks of stability. The fact that Stephen hadn’t relapsed when he heard the news, but continued to have an unprecedented period of relative lucidity and stable functioning, had heartened Niall.

“He’s handled that news very well,” Dr. Fardesh mused. “When he does bring up your name, it’s always associated with Michael. What he’s trying to work through definitely relates to Michael’s murder. He occasionally mentions the name Marchant or the Marchant account. Does that mean anything to you?”

Niall’s brow crinkled as she searched her memories but came up empty-handed. The name sounded vaguely familiar, but . . .

“No . . . I don’t think I know that name.”

Dr. Fardesh shrugged. “Well, whatever the name means to Stephen, he becomes quite agitated whenever he brings it up.”

“And he brings it up in association with Michael?” Niall asked, puzzled.

Dr. Fardesh had nodded. “Don’t be too concerned with it. It will either come out or it won’t. These things take time for an individual like Stephen to process.”

Stephen typically never said much to Niall when she’d come to visit over the last month. He still quickly became restless and agitated in her presence, although never to the point of violence. But he did recognize her and call her by her name. He’d even recognized Alexis on that initial visit back in December, and Niall Chandler Sr. on subsequent visits. That had created some disproportionate expectations from Niall’s parents, who seemed convinced that Stephen would be back behind his desk at Chandler Financial someday soon, barking out orders and making brilliant business decisions under pressure.

Her parents continued to cling to these unrealistic expectations despite Dr. Fardesh and Rose Gonzalez’s warnings as to the monumental unlikelihood of them. Stephen needed supervision and assistance in order to maintain his most basic hygiene, continued to shy away from all strangers, and typically spoke approximately fifty words per day cumulatively to Dr. Fardesh and the various other employees at Evergreen Park to whom he was accustomed. If someone didn’t put a tray of food directly in front of him and encourage him repeatedly to eat, Niall had little doubt that Stephen would eventually starve if left to his own devices.

Niall had taken to just ignoring her parents when they rattled on about Stephen’s miraculous improvements. She was still furious with her mother for what she’d done in front of Vic back in December. But Niall had been so overwhelmed by her own feelings of guilt, grief, and hopelessness when it came to Stephen that she hadn’t yet confronted Alexis about her underhanded, passive aggressive behavior on that day.

And she hadn’t seen Vic since he’d cast one last incredulous, furious glance at Niall before he walked out of her apartment for the last time.

Better not to think about that now. It pained her excruciatingly to think of losing Vic when she’d just found him. And she needed all of her psychological resources to deal with what occurred now, here in the present. She could focus on only one step at a time. She had Stephen to consider, as well as the increasing stress and work associated with the upcoming exhibit at the museum. In addition she’d received notice that she could officially close on her condominium in three weeks, and thus had all the planning associated with that endeavor filling up her days.

Vic had tried to contact her back in December after that ugly incident with Alexis, but Niall hadn’t returned his calls. Maybe he’d believed that her refusal to speak to him signaled guilt—or even disinterest—because the phone calls had stopped. Just as she’d done earlier that fall, she carefully avoided seeing him. She’d begun to wonder if he was even spending any time in his apartment since Christmas, because she rarely heard his door opening or closing at night or in the morning.

And she’d listened so carefully for any sounds indicating his presence. As she lay in bed at night, alone and miserable, that’s practically all she did.

Whenever she considered what she should do about Vic, a sort of emotional paralysis overcame her. All she could do was focus on now, on this step of her life. If she thought too far into the future, she was afraid she would miss a step and spill down a steep, treacherous, emotional staircase.

“It was movie night last night, wasn’t it?” Niall asked Stephen when he sat awkwardly on the couch across from her. She noticed that he glanced over to Eli in the attached solarium. Niall knew that what Rose said was true—Stephen was a grown man, not a child. Nevertheless, that was what he reminded her of presently as he affirmed to himself that Eli, a familiar, comfortable presence, hadn’t wandered too far away from him.