Wrecked (Clayton Falls #3)(21)
Author: Alyssa Rose Ivy

“Because marrying the father of my child was a bad idea?”

“Emily.” She looked at Noah and back at me. He wasn’t a baby anymore. I couldn’t just say anything in front of him.

“I know. I’ll go talk to him.”

I took the steps as slow as humanly possible. There had been a time when I’d been Daddy’s little girl, but that ship had sailed years ago. I stopped in front of his closed door, steadying myself before knocking.

“Come in.” His voice was gruff. It was nothing like the voice I remembered from my childhood.

I took a deep breath and pushed it open. Dad sat propped up in bed with a laptop on one of those portable desks. “Hello, Emily.”

“Hi, Dad.” I awkwardly leaned around the computer to hug him.

He patted my arm just as awkwardly. I remembered back to a time when he would have given me a bone crunching hug instead. “I didn’t think you were getting in until tonight.”

“I couldn’t wait any longer to see Noah.”

“He’s a sweet boy.” Dad glanced at his computer screen.

“I know.” I looked down. I couldn’t look Dad in the eye anymore either. I guess it was one thing we had in common.

“I appreciate you letting me spend time with him this summer.”

Why’d he have to put it that way? Like I was doing him a favor. “Of course. It worked out well. I got a lot of extra shifts in this summer that I couldn’t have otherwise.”

“That’s what your mother said. At least you haven’t lost your work ethic.” He typed a few words on the computer. Dad was still on the payroll at the college, but he wasn’t teaching any classes anymore. I think he was having a hard time letting go, and he definitely wasn’t ready to give up on his research.

I picked at my nail. “How have you been feeling?”

“You’re not my nurse, Emily. You don’t have to ask that.”

“I’m asking as your daughter.”

“I’m fine. How am I supposed to be doing?”

“I’ll let you rest.” I wasn’t going to cry. I’d already shed enough tears over my dad’s distaste for me to last a lifetime. Surprisingly, it wasn’t the fact that I got pregnant in high school that he resented me for. No, it was because I married the guy who knocked me up. Dad thought Tim was trouble—and he was right. But what was I supposed to do?

Dad nodded, and I left the room.

“That was fast.” Mom stood with her arms crossed at the bottom of the stairs.

I shrugged. “I tried.”

“Did you?”

I was about to ask where Noah was, but I heard his squeals coming from the living room. I followed them to find him rolling around on the floor with my parents’ golden retriever.

“He loves that dog.” Mom put an arm around my shoulder.

“It seems that way.”

“You know if you moved back up here, he could see him all the time.”

“We’ve been over this…”

She turned toward me, placing a hand on each of my shoulders. “Sweetheart, you look exhausted. You’ve been working yourself to the bone. Why won’t you come home and let me help?”

“We live in Wilmington now.”

“You only moved there for Tim. Don’t you think it’s time you moved on?”

I shook my head. “No.”

“Is this about your father?”

“No.”

“Emily. You have to think about more than just yourself now.” She said it softly but it hurt like hell.

“You think I don’t know that? Do you think I’ve been working this hard just for myself? Do you think I’ve had almost no life since Noah was born because I’m selfish?” I might have stopped myself from crying with my dad, but I wasn’t able to stop it this time.

“I know. But you can make it easier.”

“I can’t. I’m not crawling back here.”

“Is that it? You’re afraid of looking like you can’t handle it on your own? Because plenty of moms can’t handle it even with a husband.”

“It’s more than that. I think we’re where we should be.”

“I thought you’d say that.”

“Then why’d you bring it up?” I wiped away the tears with the back of my hand.

“I had to try.”

I sat down on the floor next to Noah. I let him play for a minute before pulling him onto my lap. He only let me snuggle him for a second before chasing after the dog again.

“Why don’t you go lie down?” Mom said from behind me. “He’ll be ready for his nap soon too.”

“I know. Maybe I can convince him to nap with me.”

She laughed. “Good luck with that. But his portable crib is set up in your room anyway.”

“I’ve missed him so much.”

“I know.”

Noah stopped and walked back over to me, falling down into my arms.

How could I stay upset when I had the most amazing little man in my life? I stood up holding him against me. “I’m going to see if I can get him to nap.”

Mom smiled. “See you both in a few hours.”

I walked back upstairs and pushed open the door to my childhood bedroom. I held Noah against me for a while longer before putting him down in his pack and play. He seemed surprisingly content to play with some toys.

I curled up under my quilt and watched him until I heard his breathing even out. Once I knew he had fallen asleep, I followed.

Chapter Fourteen

Emily

“Mama, Mama,” Noah woke me up an hour later.

It took me a second to wake up fully. “Hi, baby.” I stayed in bed for a minute listening to his happy chatter. An hour wasn’t nearly enough sleep. I’d have to make some coffee to survive until Noah’s bedtime.

I picked Noah up out of the crib and carried him back downstairs. He struggled against me so I set him down. He took off and raced into the kitchen.

I heard a couple of voices. I quickly realized the male voice belonged to my brother’s best friend, Austen.

I tensed when I heard Noah scream—until I realized it was actually a happy squeal. I stepped into the kitchen and watched Austen swinging Noah around.

“Hey, Em!” Austen set Noah down and pulled me right into a hug.

“Hi, Austen.”

“You look great.” He turned back to my mom. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. She looks incredible.”