Beautiful Disaster

"Hey," she echoes my words, sounding neutral, which in her case means she’s very likely still pissed.

"Do you know when you’ll be home? I miss you."

She pauses, then I hear her exhale slowly.

"Did you talk?"

"Yeah."

"Did he tell you?"

"Yeah." My reply comes out sounding a little dejected, something I don’t really feel. Her answering silence is strained, and I let my forehead touch the cool glass, trying to come up with something witty to say. "We might have to get a new couch soon."

"Huh?" she asks, obviously surprised at what she must guess is a weird change of topic.

"Because there’s lube and jizz all over it."

Now a completely different kind of silence follows, and I can tell she must be smiling although she tries to sound gruff.

"Seriously? Can’t you ever make it up into the bedroom? The sheets are so much easier to change!"

"Guilty as charged. I jumped him. You can spank me for having been such a bad boy. I think it’s mostly my jizz anyway."

Bella gives a brief bark of laughter.

"Oh, no, I won’t, you actually have to be on your best behavior for me to indulge your need to be spanked!"

"Too bad, you do it so well."

"Smart-ass."

"Always," I grin, then look out into the night. "Come home now, please?"

"Sure. Shall I bring pizza? I can grab it on the way over."

"I’ll get it, you just get home, ‘kay?"

"How can you be so needy after what I presume amounted to you f**king the living shit out of Jazz, pun intended?"

"Because I’m a glutton! And it’s been weeks since we just watched a movie together, the three of us, without anyone having their panties in a twist over something."

"What do you know about the state of my panties?" she huffs, but before I can answer, she goes on. "Scratch that. Rose is tired anyway. I should let her sleep. Extra pineapple for me, please."

"Sure thing. Love ya."

"You, too," she replies, then hangs up.

The sound of one of the floorboards creaking tells me that I’m no longer alone, but I wait for Jazz to come closer before I turn around and look at him. He’s trying so hard to appear neutral but his expression screams that if not upset, he’s at least slightly miffed, but that just makes me grin.

Holding his gaze I walk over to him, then pull him close, hating that he has already donned a t-shirt and sweat pants as I would have preferred to feel his skin on mine.

Looking deeply into his eyes I lean in until our foreheads almost touch, then utter the few words he so valiantly insisted he doesn’t need to hear, but obviously wants to.

"Love you, too."

To take some of the sappiness out of the sentiment, I reach for his ass and squeeze it briefly, making him snort before he steals a quick kiss.

"So, what was this about pizza? I’m starving!"

Snorting, I scroll through the directory on my phone, then call the Italian restaurant around the corner and place the order. Ten minutes later I make my way into the cold night, returning to our building just as Bella comes walking down the street from the other direction. I wait at the door for her, trying for an easy grin, but from her knowing smile I gather that I probably still look somewhat guilty. I don’t like fighting with her, and prefer that her screaming at me always ends with hot, equally angry make-up sex, not hours spent apart.

I’m a little surprised when she doesn’t leave it at a quick peck on my mouth but deepens her kiss to a real one, tongue and all. She even has a coy smile for me when she pulls back to unlock the door.

"What? Never heard of conditioning? Gotta reward you on the rare occasion that you get your head out of your ass."

I huff, then follow her inside, the stack of pizza cartons in my arms sadly keeping me from slapping her ass as I really want to right now.

"How’s Rose?" I ask instead as we wait for the elevator.

"She’s good. She was bitching for fifteen minutes that she needs a haircut.

You know how Rose is, when she has nothing else to complain about other than her looks, it means everything is perfect. The baby’s starting to get really active, and I don’t think Rose will get any respite just because she’s sleeping for longer intervals now."

"Probably not."

"I’m so glad we don’t have one. Yet, I mean."

"Yet?" I can’t keep a grin off my face. As usual, Bella scowls, but then shrugs.

"Who knows what I’ll think about that in a few years? If I can see two thickheaded mules like you and Jazz see reason with a single temper tantrum, I’m sure I can get you to change diapers at 3:00 am, too. I should remember that tactic, it might prove useful in the years to come."

"Bella?"

"Yup?" She pops the ‘p’ succinctly, her smile already darkening with anticipation.

"Now you’re the one who deserves that spanking."

"Tease! Like that will keep me from anything."

"I could leave it at just a spanking, you know."

She huffs, then holds the door open for me upstairs so I can bring the pizzas inside.

"Theoretically, I guess you could. Practically? Never. And that’s one of the reasons I gladly suffer all your stubbornness and stupidity."

Taking the cartons from me after having ditched her outer layer of clothes, she makes her way over to the couch, briefly scowling at the spots before she shakes her head in exasperation. Jazz joins her, armed with three bottles of beer and a stack of napkins, and I quickly follow.

Together, we curl up on the couch, Bella wedged between Jazz and me, eating pizza right out of the box and drinking beer straight from the bottle, as it should be. Sometimes, the simplest things in life are still the best.

Chapter 34

"Do you really think this is a good idea? We could just do it in a week or so instead. Or next month. No need to rush it, right?"

I sigh, fighting hard to control the smile that threatens to spread across my face.

"Jazz, calm down. If you don’t want to play, then we won’t."

"It’s not that I don’t want to," he offers, then shrugs. "But, you know, my brief venture into topping hasn’t worked out all that well, with the whole lack of observation thing. Maybe it’s still too soon?"

"Only one way to find out, right? But right now it’s not your lack of awareness that’s a problem, but more the fact that you show as much confidence as a slug."

"Hey, who says that slugs can’t be confident?"

"I do," I reply, and when that makes him pause I simply raise one eyebrow.

He grunts, then grumbles something under his breath about cocky bastards.

"Look, there’s no need to fret. I’ll be there the whole time, a silent observer you can depend on, should you need me. But for what it’s worth, I think you’re ready."

He smiles at me gratefully, then takes a last, deep breath.

"Okay, then let’s do this! I mean, what can go wrong? Chances are five to one that I’ll be the one to safeword, not her!"

I wisely hold my tongue, then follow him across the hall and into the playroom.

It’s slightly weird being reduced to a spectator in my own playroom, but it makes sense to do Jazz’s first scene as a Dom here, with Bella, not me.

We’ve talked at length about what he can do, what he has to keep in mind, and what signals he needs to respond to, should they occur – I really think he is ready. Bella thinks we’re both full of shit and should have done this months ago already. Which is another reason why I think she deserves to be on the receiving end of a few errant flogger hits. She has been asking for it – literally and figuratively.