Divide & Conquer (Cut & Run #4)(35)
Author: Abigail Roux

“Take care of you?” Deuce finished for him. “Are those the only reasons? Your job and your pride?”

“No,” Zane murmured as he spread his fingers over Tys chest. “Those arent the only reasons.”

“Spill, Zane,” Deuce ordered. “Get it out now.” The words balled up in Zanes throat. He was talking to Tys brother, for heavens sake. “Im afraid,” he whispered. “Im afraid itll change things.”

“What things?” Deuce asked. “Relationship things?” “Oh yeah,” Zane answered in a rush.

“You think my brother will dump you because youre blind,” Deuce surmised in a troubled voice.

Zane hesitated. “I dont want to think that. Its….” He grasped for a word. “Disloyal.” “Disloyal,” Deuce repeated curiously. “To whom? To Ty?” “Yes, to Ty.” Zane frowned. “Who else is there?”

Deuce hummed thoughtfully. “Theres you, Zane,” he continued after a pause.

“Me?” Zane shook his head as he inhaled deeply and sighed. “I dont follow.” Deuce sighed, long and loud. “If theres one thing my big brother taught me, its that sometimes you have to look out for number one. Dont worry so much about what hell do or what hell think.”

Zane sighed. “Well, until just recently I was the only one looking out for me, so Im kind of used to that part of it.” “Tell me something, Zane,” Deuce said in a sly voice. “Is that really the biggest thing youre worried about right now? That Ty might leave you?”

Zane pressed his lips together hard. The tone of Deuces voice made him a little suspicious. But Deuce was never cruel, even if he did like to tease sometimes. Zane was worried about so many things he couldnt even start to rank them, but Ty—and whether Ty would still want him after such a radical change—really stood out. Zane figured it was a reflection of how much their relationship had developed. The next words were out before he thought them through. “He said he loves me.”

“I know he does,” Deuce assured him with a laugh. “Im surprised he told you, but Im glad he did. So, keeping that in mind, Ill ask you again: is that really the biggest thing youre concerned about?”

Zane closed his eyes, even though it made no difference in the darkness, and really considered the question. What did he really have? His job, and Ty. If it came down to it and he lost his job, he was relatively sure he could flounder his way into something else to do, somehow. But if he lost Ty, Zane just wasnt sure hed care about anything else. The slight pangs of pain he felt whenever he caught Ty looking at him in a particular way came more often now, and it was starting to make him want things he wasnt sure he could handle. “Damn it,” he swore under his breath, hoping Ty really was asleep. “Yes.”

“Well, Id say thats pretty good, then,” Deuce said happily. “I mean, as far as problems go. Tys too stubborn to leave you if he loves you.”

Zane let out a groan that reflected both frustration and relief. It helped so much just to hear that. “So Im stressing over whats probably nothing. Paranoia.”

“I wouldnt call it paranoia. More… spinning your mental wheels. I mean, has he given any indication that he might leave now? Whats he been doing?”

“Hes been great, not that there was anything he could do in the hospital. But he didnt leave me alone,” Zane said. “Was there when I woke up, sat with me there, got the doctors to let me leave, and got me home. All that aside, I really dont know what to do with myself. In theory? Its temporary. I could wake up tomorrow just fine. Or it could be permanent. Not one doctor of five could tell me anything more than „We just have to wait and see,” he muttered, “which was kind of cruel in itself.”

“Wait and see. Makes you wonder what they tell deaf people,” Deuce muttered. “Oh God, that was horrible. Forget I said that.” “You know how many idioms there are that have something about „seeing or „sight in them?” Zane asked, letting a little waspishness into his voice. He groaned aloud to punctuate the annoyance. He could hear Deuce trying not to laugh. “Ill go nuts if I have to sit around here doing nothing,” Zane added. “Its not even day one, and Im already antsy. And thats with being worried about running into a wall.”

“So do something,” Deuce suggested. “Who blew you up? Cant you plot revenge or something? Any open cases you can mull over?” “We were investigating a report of a suspicious package,” Zane said as he started thinking over their caseload. “Although I wouldnt be averse to a little plotting. As for cases, its not like Im assigned to Financial Crimes, tracing forgers or art thieves through paperwork. Criminal involves more than a little legwork.”

“So… why was there a bomb there?” Deuce asked. Zane shook his head, belatedly remembering he had to speak. “No idea. And Ive got no information after being in the hospital. Im sure Ty will find out what he can while hes at the office.”

“No, Zane. I mean, why was there a bomb there? Who called it in? Was it a trap? Think about it. Come up with a theory.” “Yeah, okay. I can do that.” He shook his head. “Hey, Deuce?” “Yeah?” He sounded amused.

“Why are you surprised?” Zane asked, giving into the curiosity niggling at him. “Is it that he told me, or that he feels that way to start with?”

“I knew he was in love with you when we were in West Virginia, Zane. Im surprised he figured it out. And yeah, Im surprised as hell that he told you.”

Zane barely stopped himself from sitting up and dumping Ty on the floor. “In West Virginia? That was almost four months ago.” “That surprises you?” “Deuce, if I hadnt been scared out of my f**king mind when he told me, I would have fallen over from the shock,” Zane said with some amount of surety.

Deuce began to laugh softly. “And then he shoved you over the edge of a balcony or something, I know. Very romantic.” He began to laugh harder.

“It was a three-story drop!” Zane growled in outrage. “I didnt even get a chance to say anything because the ship security guys were waiting for us!”

The laughter trailed off, and the line was silent for a moment. “What would you have said that you cant say now?” Deuce asked, voice neutral.

Zane literally flinched, flashing back to the confusing coil of emotions that had rocked him in that not even two minutes of revelation, jumping, and falling after Ty had said “I love you.” But now, he wasnt remembering the literal fall from three decks above a cruise ship swimming pool. He was feeling the echoes of his more recent emotional shock in the stands at a fan-filled softball tournament: The fall wasnt coming. It was already over. He just had to figure out how to find words of his own. The honest words. “I dont know,” he got out in a strangled whisper.