Flawed Love
I start down the main street, backpack slung over my shoulder. I’m wearing my chucks today, thank God, because there’s no way I could walk this far in anything else. My jeans are the oldest pair I have, and the shirt is one I stole from Rainer when he grew out of it. He’s got mega muscles now, the giant stud. My hair is shorter than I would like, but hey, who’s complaining? It’s low-maintenance.
I, unlike Missy, have real blond hair.
“Yo, Ems.”
I turn and see one of my close friends, Kenny, running towards me. He’s got his backpack over his shoulders and it bounces with every step. His long blond hair is flying around the in wind, and he keeps pushing his glasses up on his nose because they’re sliding down. He’s adorably gross.
“What’s up, K-dog?”
He stops when he reaches me, drops his hands to his knees, and starts panting.
“Dude, you need to get fit, seriously. You just ran, what, five meters?”
“Bite me, Em,” he grunts, straightening. “What the hell are you making me run for? Where’s Rainer?”
“Getting STDs with Missy.”
He wrinkles his nose. “Fucking gross.”
I snort. “Yeah, my thoughts exactly. I’m walking home, so if you wanna join you better stop that panting.”
“Dammit, you have my phone. Otherwise I wouldn’t be enduring this hell.”
I hook my arm through his. “Don’t be a hater. How was school?”
He shrugs, studying the side of my face with his light green eyes. “Are you wearing makeup?”
“No,” I snap, rubbing at my eye.
I am wearing mascara, but I couldn’t apply it properly, so I only put it on one eye. It wasn’t my finest moment. I don’t even know why I’m wearing it. I guess . . . well, there’s this guy . . . God who am I kidding? Most of the guys think I’m a dude.
“You so are,” he teases. “Who are you trying to impress?”
“I put it on one eye. It was an experiment.”
He shoves me with his shoulder. “Spill, Ems.”
I sigh. “Fine. I might have a crush.”
He whoops loudly. “There’s hope for you yet.”
“Eat me, dickhead.”
“Don’t be so mean.” He grins. “Now spill. Who are you checking out?”
I can tell Kenny anything. He’s been my friend all through high school. Not the kind of friend Rainer is, but close.
“It’s Jack.”
He wiggles his eyebrows. “No shit?”
“Yeah, but he’ll never notice me.”
He stops and swings me around with long, bony fingers. “Why not? You’re pretty.”
I blink. “Did you just call me pretty?”
He shrugs. “You are. So what?”
“I look like a man.”
He grunts. “Because you want to. If you wore a dress, and didn’t act like a tomboy, you’d look like a very pretty girl. Prettier than Missy.”
“Now you’re just being mean.”
He chuckles and throws his arms around my shoulders, walking beside me again.
“So, tell me about Jack. Have you spoken to him?”
“No,” I mumble. “I don’t even think he knows I exist.”
“Then make him know you exist!”
“That’s not possible.”
“It is. Wear something sexy.”
I scoff. “I don’t own anything sexy.”
He tilts his head back to the sky and rolls his eyes. “Then find something. Come on, if you want him to notice you, then you have to make the effort. Do you want to die a virgin?”
“Shut it, douche. You’re more likely to die a virgin than me.”
He grunts. “Probably.”
“Anyway, let’s not talk about it. Jack will never notice me—end of story.”
“If you say so,” he sings.Bloody Kenny.
~*~*~*~
My window slides up and a booted foot comes through, followed by another, followed by Rainer’s big body. I’m on my bed, eating popcorn and watching Top Gun. I glance over and see Rainer turn and slide the window shut. Then he kicks off his boots and throws himself onto my bed. His hand goes out and takes some popcorn, and he fluffs some pillows behind his head and settles in.
“If you’re wet, or dirty, or sex stained, I’ll kick your ass, Rainer Torrence.”
He glances at me from the corner of his eye. “Sex stained?”
“Yeah, from slut-face. I mean, Missy.”
He grins at me. “Are you jealous, Emy?”
“Am I jealous for not having a bank of STDs?”
He chuckles. “Yeah, right. I get you.”
“Why are you here? I thought you’d be riding the pony all night long.”
He laughs, tossing a piece of popcorn at me. “I’m not the cuddling type.”
“So you only have one round in you? I’m sad for you, Rai.”
He wraps an arm around my neck, putting me in a headlock. “I’ve got plenty of rounds, smart-ass.”
“You smell. Let me go!”
“Nah,” he says, rubbing his underarm near my face.
“Rainer, I’ll break your dick off. Let me go!”
He lets me go with a chuckle and yawns, leaning back into my pillows.
“Your bed is better than mine,” he murmurs.
“You’re not sleeping here again. You snore.”
“Can’t make me leave,” he says, wiggling down into the sheets.
“I can, and I will. I’ll use force, and scissors.”
He raises a brow. “I don’t even want to know.”
“No, you don’t. Go home and torture someone else.”
“You love it when I’m here, Emy. Admit it.”
I grunt.
We fall silent and both of us focus on the TV. I glance over at him about ten minutes into our silence and decide to ask him a question, knowing he’ll give it to me straight. There’s not a lot I don’t tell Rainer.
“Hey, Rai?”
He looks over to me. “Yeah?”
“Do you think I’m pretty?”
He blinks at me. “Say what?”
Dammit, I didn’t say that right.
“I mean . . . do you think I’m pretty enough to ever get a date?”
He studies my face, and when he realizes I’m serious, he answers. “I don’t really see you like that, kid, but yeah, if I’m to answer honestly then yeah, you’re pretty.”
“Pretty enough to get a date . . .”
“Yeah, for sure. Why?”
I look away and shrug. “No reason.”
“Oh come on, you gotta tell me now. Are you crushing on someone?”
I laugh. “No one says that anymore, dude.”
“Spill, Emalie.”
“Ohhh, using my full name. Shit just got real.”
He reaches over and puts his arm around my neck again. “I’ll use force.”
“All right, yeesh. I . . . I might want to ask Jack on a date.”
He’s silent, for way too long.
“Did you hear me?”
“Jack the Sack?”
I burst out laughing. “Oh my God, that’s so mean.”