From Rags(16)
Author: Suzanne Wright

What did Jaxxon like the most about her new life? Not the attention or the fancy car or the designer clothes or the constant mingling with celebs. It was the financial security; the fact that she didn’t have to fret every day about whether she’d make her rent money or afford enough food to last the week. What’s more, not only did she feel as though she was finally in control of the direction her life was taking, but her life was actually taking a direction instead of her just plodding along. She was still adjusting to that, but it was an adjustment she was gladly making.

Still, though, a conflicting cocktail of emotions assailed her; awe at the grandness before her, awkwardness at entering this other world, and also dread at having to be around people who were for the most part condescending to her. It wasn’t the fact that they were celebs that had Jaxxon rumpled, it was the judgmental looks and the smiles that were so sickly sweet they were simultaneously acidic. Where Jaxxon had grown up, if you had something to say you said it. In this world, it was all indirect insults and whispering behind your back. Groan! Not that everyone was like that, but the ones who were just grated on her nerves. Jaxxon swore that she would never allow herself to become so used to luxury and money that she was snobby and narrow-minded.

Basking in the attention, Anna took her time heading through the break in the gang of reporters, posing and smiling and blowing kisses. Chris waved like he was royalty. Bruno just nodded and smiled with his hands tucked in his pockets. Jaxxon might have given a fleeting wave if the lights weren’t getting on her bloody nerves. It occurred to her that the frustration would leak into her eyes and give the reporters what they wanted so at least Ollie and Richie would be happy with any photographs printed.

The questions being yelled were just as frustrating; were she and Bruno an item? Would she care to comment on the rumors about her and Matt? Who designed her dress and where was it flown in from?

Jaxxon groaned aloud. “What’s the point in answering any of your questions when you’ll only print whatever you want anyway!?” She had meant it as an insult but it seemed they all thought it was rather funny.

As soon as they stepped inside and Jaxxon realised how huge the place was and how many celebrities were about, she reached for a very nervous Anna. “You’ll be fine.”

“My God, Jaxxon, there’s Stuart Nolan!”

And so it begins, thought Jaxxon.

After they had each been greeted by the celeb host, Bruno went off searching for his ex and Chris went off to find himself some meat for the evening – as he so oddly put it. Jaxxon and Anna tried the ‘mingling’ thing but soon names and faces became blurry and Jaxxon felt dizzy with it all. The attention was unreal; it was as though every move she made was watched, every word she said examined, every expression she wore scrutinised. And then there were the randy bastards who kept giving her tits-to-toes inspections then glaring into her eyes. Just goes to show oddballs are everywhere. Mostly Jaxxon just glided through the crowds murmuring soothing words to Anna who was by that point almost bouncing off the walls with excitement. “Christ, Anna, breathe. You’re going to hyperventilate.”

“I’m sorry but it’s just so…wow. Aren’t you even a little bit excited? I mean come on, Jaxxon, you’ve had enough celebs flirting with you like crazy and haven’t even blushed.”

“Anna, they’re just people. Same as you and me. Just because I get to occasionally see them on the big platinum box in my apartment doesn’t mean they deserve to be worshipped like gods. Granted, most of them have worked hard to get where they are but so do plenty of other people and just because their job doesn’t get them on the big box doesn’t mean they’re worth any less than anyone here, does it?”

Anna inhaled a long breath, steadying herself. “You’re right. I know you’re right. I shouldn’t let them scare me.”

“No you shouldn’t.”

“They’re just people, same as us.”

“Exactly.”

“Oh my God! Isla Merrick and Jonathan Griffith are on their way over!”

Jaxxon groaned. Starry-eyed Anna was back.

“The face of Allure,” drawled the curvy auburn-haired actress.

Jaxxon resisted the urge to scowl; Isla’s greeting had been pleasant but there was a clear undercurrent of that good ole condescension. The tall, immaculately groomed film producer wore a flirtatious grin that topped anything she had ever seen before now. Instead of it making her blood rush, it made her skin crawl.

“Jaxxon, isn’t it?” he asked.

She nodded then gestured to the giddy girl beside her. “This is Anna Lawson.”

Isla and Jonathan both smiled at her, deepening Anna’s blush until her face glowed like a neon sign.

“My God,” said Anna, “I’m a massive fan. Of both of you.”

Isla peered around and then zoomed in on Jaxxon. “Looks like you lost that model boyfriend of yours.”

“Can’t lose what you don’t have.”

“Oh, you two aren’t a couple then?” asked Jonathan.

“Mates.”

Isla looked at her with (false) sympathy. “Don’t take it too much to heart that he’s not looking for more than friendship with you.”

Jaxxon had to again resist scowling; Isla knew that was not what she had meant.

“Move on to different pastures,” continued Isla. “They might not be greener but there’s no dignity in chasing after someone who isn’t interested, is there?”

Anna gasped. “It’s not Bruno, it’s Jaxxon. She’s always getting the come-on from blokes but she’s too picky.”

It was said with such affection that, even in this situation, Jaxxon found herself smiling.

“You know what they say,” began Isla, “beggars can’t be -”

“It won’t work, you know,” said Jaxxon in a bored, flat tone. “Trying to make me feel small…It won’t work. I feel sorry for you if you have to put other people down to make yourself feel big.” Isla guffawed but Jaxxon could tell that her directness had put Isla out of her comfort zone.

“Sweetheart, if you’re such a sensitive person then fame really isn’t for you.”

“Sensitive?” Jaxxon smiled. “No. You see the thing is, sweetheart, unless insults come from someone who I care about then I really couldn’t give a shit about their opinion. It’s the fact that you’re trying so hard to get at me that I don’t like. If you can’t handle frankness, then having a conversation with me really isn’t for you.”