Pure Wicked (Page 32)

Pure Wicked (Wicked Lovers #9.5)(32)
Author: Shayla Black

She didn’t say a word for the longest time, merely crossed her arms over her chest as if protecting herself. But he could see the wheels turning in her head, examining the situation. He thanked god she was too polite not to listen and too logical for his rationale to escape her.

“I hear what you’re saying,” she said finally. “In your shoes, I probably wouldn’t have told me, either. I shouldn’t be upset that you had to protect yourself from a near stranger because you didn’t know if I would sell you out. But that doesn’t make being lied to hurt less.”

Jesse felt guilty for not believing in her sooner and coming clean, but grateful she understood, at least on some level. “Hurting you was never my intention, so I really am sorry for that. But I think you also never expected to care about me.” He curled a finger under her chin but she resisted meeting his gaze. “Are you this upset because you do?”

Her eyes widened to big green pools of confusion and contrition. More tears shimmered, threatening to spill. “I swore off relationships. I’m bad with romance.”

“You’re bad…or you’ve tried it with the wrong people? I’ve made the same mistake.” He took a deep breath, diving head first into the already deep conversation. “I’m going to put the truth out there. I’ve never felt this way with any other woman.”

Instantly, she shot him a scathing, skeptical stare. “You don’t have to let me down easy with a lie.”

“I wouldn’t bother.” He anchored his hands in her hair and clenched his fists. “If you were anyone else, after the sex I would have already shrugged and walked away.”

“So you’re saying all those celebrities and groupies you’ve screwed don’t hold a candle to me? Right…”

Her sarcasm bit, and he tugged on her hair. “They didn’t. Everything about you makes sense to me. And let me tell you, nothing in my life has made sense in a long time—especially not relationships. You’re pretty without artifice, kind even to the people who have wronged you, smart, ambitious. And you’re refreshingly not narcissistic or mercenary. You admitted that we click.”

Agreement crossed Bristol’s face, though she didn’t say it aloud. “So?”

“I’m going to ask again, are you this upset because you didn’t want to care about me? Or because it shocks you that you do?”

She pulled away from him with a huff, her little fists clenching. “Why can’t I be normal? The rest of the free world can find someone and hook up for a day or two without getting involved emotionally. The first time I try, what happens? Yeah, I wind up being all giddy and excited. You walk in the room and I feel something in my stomach flutter. I can barely wait to touch you. Or even talk to you. I have to remind myself not to fall in love. And now I’m making an idiot out of myself with one of the most famous people on the planet.” She shook her head. “I was already aiming high with the prince of Lafayette County because he was nice to me once upon a time and—”

“Don’t beat yourself up about Hayden. He’s the deficient one. He broke apart from you to be with your sister because he can’t equal you in intellect, ambition, or character. He found someone more his speed. If he’d stayed much longer, you would have realized he wasn’t for you.”

She shrugged. “Maybe.”

“He left you before you could beat him to it. He probably felt outdone by you. But don’t for one second think that small-town prick split because you weren’t good enough for him, so therefore you’re nowhere near enough for me. It’s bullshit, and I’ll argue with you all day long.”

“Hayden doesn’t matter anymore.”

“He doesn’t, but we do. And I’m sorry I wasn’t on the up-and-up, but you know why. I’m not letting you go over this crap.” He shrugged as if his mind were made up. “I’m seriously not.”

She took a shuddering breath, tears still threatening to spill. “How did I come in to confront you about lying to me and wind up feeling like the dysfunctional head case?”

He laughed. If Bristol could tell even a sideswiping sort of joke, then he must have said something that reached her. “Well, I usually feel like a dysfunctional head case and I didn’t want to be alone.”

She gave him a watery grin. “You suck.”

“Not yet, but if you lose the clothes, I’ll be happy to find some part of you I can get my mouth on.”

With a playful swat on the shoulder, she sniffled. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I know exactly why you were upset. No one likes to be lied to. Honestly, it’s a relief to me that you know the truth. And now you can stop calling me Jamie. Every time you cry out that name during sex, I want to punch my cousin.”