Solitary Man(42)
Author: Carly Phillips

“I’d be foolish to turn down good medical care, Dr. Molloy.” Nikki smiled, but Kevin wasn’t fooled by her affable demeanor. As a general rule, she barely said two words to him without him prompting her first. This morning’s “I have a doctor appointment at noon, remember?” was the longest sentence to pass from her lips.

He hadn’t forgotten but he was grateful she’d included him on her own. Otherwise he’d have to resort to caveman tactics again, and he didn’t relish another scene in front of the good doctor.

“Well, I wasn’t talking about using my private practice instead of the clinic,” she said wryly. “But I think you made a wise decision. Now let’s get started. Nikki, since this is a routine monthly visit, you don’t need to undress. Just let me see that stomach and you’ll be out of here before you know it.”

Kevin watched as the doctor readied a small machine. With barely a glance in his direction, Nikki lifted her shirt to reveal her pale, rounded stomach.

He walked around to the side of the examining table and reached for her hand. Her protest was minimal—a slight resistant tug against his hand, but when he refused to release her, she stilled.

“Everything okay?” Dr. Molloy asked her. “Any unusual symptoms, questions?”

Nikki shook her head. “Everything’s been fine lately.”

“Nausea’s gone?”

“Thank goodness.”

The doctor glanced at the chart. “You’ve gained two pounds. That’s good considering you’re merely putting back on what you lost during the first trimester.” She shook a white bottle in her hand. “This might be cold,” she warned, before squeezing the gel onto Nikki’s exposed skin.

He watched, mesmerized by the sight of her flesh, by the knowledge that his baby lay growing inside her.

“Now I’m going to listen for this little guy’s—or girl’s—heartbeat. Ready?” she asked, then began rolling what appeared to be a rectangular-shaped instrument over the gel coating Nikki’s stomach.

Without warning, a strong and steady sound reverberated throughout the room. “Hear that?” Dr. Molloy glanced up and met his gaze, a wide smile on her face.

He had the distinct sense that no matter how many times a day she heard the sound, Dr. Molloy got as big a kick out of the sound as her patients and their respective spouses. He listened in awe. Everything else in the room faded until only the combination of a whooshing noise and the distinct thump of his baby’s heartbeat remained.

“That’s… him?” Nikki asked, breaking into his concentration.

The doctor nodded. “Or her. Have you two discussed whether or not you want to know the baby’s sex ahead of time?”

Sex. A boy or a girl. No longer an indistinct blur on a monitor screen, the whooshing sound confirmed what he already knew. They’d created a life. Together. Pride and many other emotions swelled in his chest and clogged his throat until he could barely swallow, let alone breathe.

“Knowing the baby’s sex.” Nikki’s voice cracked as she spoke. “I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it” She rolled her head to the side and met his gaze. For the first time in two days, Nikki’s emotions were raw and visible for him to see.

He understood because for perhaps the first time in his life, his were just as exposed. And he wasn’t as uncomfortable as he’d imagined he’d be.

“What do you think, Kevin?” Nikki asked, obviously referring to the baby’s sex.

He’d given a lot of thought to her accusations of control the other night and much as he’d have liked to turn a deaf ear, he couldn’t ignore the truth. Or the fact that the controlling part of his nature was likely to drive her away and distance him from his child. He’d resolved to tread lightly or at least attempt to talk himself out of the burning need to hold the reins on everyone and everything around him.

The doctor had given him his first opportunity to back off and give Nikki space. Hoping to let her know he’d go along with whatever she wanted, he gave her hand a brief squeeze.

He glanced at Dr. Molloy. “Whatever Nikki wants is fine with me.”

He didn’t expect her to squeeze his hand back, or hang on even tighter, but she did. The lump in his throat grew larger. What he and Nikki shared, could share, was rare. He’d be a fool to lose it.

He’d truly be his father’s son if he let it go without a fight.

“Why don’t you two give it some thought. It’s not something I’ll be finding out today anyway. Want to hear more or can I stop now?” she asked, with that same knowing grin. “You’ll get to hear him every month.”

“Or her,” Nikki said.

Kevin raised an eyebrow. “Changing your mind? She thinks it’s a boy,” he said in response to Dr. Molloy’s questioning look.

Nikki shook her head. “Just covering my bases.”

The doctor lifted the machine and flipped the power off. She handed Nikki a towel. “Everything looks fine. You can clean up a bit and meet me in my office. I’ll answer any other questions you have.” With that, she slipped out the door.

Kevin and Nikki were alone. The sheen of tears in her eyes matched the emotion stirring inside him. “Do you have any other questions for her?” Kevin asked.

“Not right now.” She crumpled a white paper sheet and wiped down her stomach, while he granted her the courtesy of turning away.

“Will you be okay if I put you in a cab and send you home? I need to run an important errand.”

“Not a problem,” she said, her words warring with the questions in her violet eyes.

No doubt she wondered why the man who professed not to want to let her out of his sight was suddenly willing to put her in a taxi alone. But she didn’t ask where he was heading. And he didn’t offer the information.

This short appointment had altered his entire life. To be more precise, Nikki had altered his life. But these last ten minutes had shown him what true bonding between people meant. For the first time, he understood some of what Nikki wanted from him—apart from the nights they used to share beneath the covers.

He heard the ripple of paper as she tossed the sheet into the trash and moved to his side. “As long as I’m in the city, I’d like to go to Janine’s anyway.”

“I can pick you up on my way home.”

She shook her head. “No need. I don’t know how long I’ll be.”