Where I Belong (Page 31)

Pussy humming sex.

Fucking into the friend zone.

Condoms.

Oh God, do not get wet right now. I drop my eyes to Nolan, needing a distraction.

“Pwincess Mia!” He runs over to me and I bend down, bringing myself down to his level. My worries and desires are left above me as I focus in on his cuteness. “Daddy said we’re going to a surpwise.” He reaches out and runs his finger down my nose and I do the same to him. His tiny face scrunches up afterwards.

“We are. But I have to ask you a question before we go.” His eyes get even larger, grayish blue just like his father’s, as he waits for me. “Have you ever been to a real castle, Sir Nolan?” He shakes his head and his mouth drops open. “Would you like to go to one right now?”

I’ve never seen anyone go from one emotion to another so quickly. If I blinked, I probably would’ve missed it. He begins jumping up and down, almost knocking me onto my ass in the process. “A weal castle! Daddy! Pwincess Mia said we can go to a weal castle!”

Ben laughs as I stand up. “You ready to go, buddy?” He picks a squirming Nolan up and smiles sweetly at me. “Are you ready, Princess Mia?”

Am I? For friendship with a man that I can’t stop thinking about? Pussy humming sex. Shit. I force a nod and swallow down my fear. “Lead the way, noble knights.”

**

Nolan’s excitement was infectious and it grew as the evening played out. When we pulled up in front of the castle, he couldn’t get out of the truck fast enough and practically sprinted toward it. When he got his picture taken with the King, he couldn’t take his eyes off him, even when Ben and I told him to look at us so we could take pictures of him with our phones. He stared at him with eyeballs the size of dinner plates, his mouth forming a tiny O. It was the cutest thing I’d ever seen. And when the actual show started and Nolan got to see the knights in action, jousting and sword fighting right in front of him, I don’t think he blinked even once.

And then there was Ben. I kept catching glances from him the entire night, meeting his eyes every few minutes when I couldn’t keep myself from looking at him. I’m sure my struggle was obvious, considering he caught me each and every time I gave into my temptation. But the look he shot back at me wasn’t the one I was used to. It wasn’t the look he gave me when I knew he was thinking about doing things to my body. I was familiar with that look. The greedy shift in his eyes, the tightness in his jaw, the way his nostrils flared like he was a caged pit bull. But I didn’t get that look tonight. Instead of the raw thirst I had seen in his eyes on more than one occasion, I saw tenderness. A friendly affection. He regarded me sweetly but there was nothing behind it. No underlying hunger.

And God, I wanted to be devoured by him.

“He is completely passed out.” I observe, walking next to Ben and focusing on Nolan’s exhausted face. I reach up and brush his wild brown hair off his forehead, smiling at his sleepy state. “I don’t even think an actual dragon could wake him up right now.”

Ben opens up the back door of his truck, laughing softly at the sight of Nolan’s face as he peels him off his shoulder. “I figured he’d crash hard after all of this.” He buckles Nolan into his car seat, closing the door and grabbing the passenger door handle. “I may have withheld his nap from him today in hopes of getting to talk to you alone on the drive back. My son likes to monopolize the conversation, as you witnessed on the way here.”

I smile, climbing up into the truck after my door is opened for me.

Nolan talked nonstop on the drive to the dinner show, and every time Ben tried to talk to me about something other than dragons or knights, Nolan would adorably cut in and change the subject. I’d be lying if I said I’m not grateful for Nolan’s missed nap.

I settle into my seat and buckle up. “I can’t say I blame him. Dragons and knights are way more exciting than what Tessa and I did today.”

He closes my door and gets in on the driver’s side, starting up the truck and pulling away from the castle. I inhale, taking in Ben’s scent that has completely filled the space between us. He smells like pure Ben. No cologne, just him. Like a man that knows exactly how to please a woman. Shit. Don’t go there. “How’s your mom doing? Tessa mentioned a few months back that she was really sick. Is it breast cancer?”

I cross one leg over the other, angling my body toward him. His one hand stays firmly planted on the wheel while his other relaxes on the console between us. I’m glued to his fingers, the fingers that I moronically doubted that night. I didn’t think there was a chance in hell he’d get me off the way he did. And now that I know what those fingers are capable of, I’m fascinated by them. I actually can’t stop looking at them. The length, the thickness, the f**king tips of them that played me like a record. I want him to turn his hand up so I can straddle his fingers and ride out my pent up orgasm right now, but that’s not going to happen. He clears his throat, gaining my attention and I’m quickly reminded of the question he hit me with before I wandered off into finger f**king la-la land.

I paint on my most convincing I wasn’t just fantasizing about what you could do to me face and answer. “Yeah. She’s doing great right now. The treatments aren’t making her nearly as sick as they did in the beginning. It was awful when she first started them.” He glances over at me and gives me a sympathetic smile. “She wouldn’t eat anything and she didn’t have the strength to get out of bed. I couldn’t leave her side for more than a few minutes at a time because she was constantly getting sick.”